06/06/2026
Anger isn't the wound.
Anger is the protector of the wound.
Over the past few months, my daughter Isabel has been expressing a lot more anger since the arrival of her baby brother. Without awareness, it would be easy to focus on the behaviour itself & try to stop it, shame or blame her.
But through years of inner child healing work, I've learned that emotions are messengers. Energy in motion.
This image perfectly illustrates the difference between the Inner Child and the Outer Child.
Your Inner Child is the vulnerable part of you that experienced pain, rejection, loneliness, fear, grief, shame, or unmet needs. It is the part of you that simply wanted to feel safe, loved, seen, heard, and understood.
Your Outer Child is the protective part of you that steps in when your Inner Child experiences something overwhelming or traumatic.
This is the part of us that develops survival strategies to avoid feeling the pain underneath.
The Outer Child is not the problem.
The Outer Child is protecting the most vulnerable parts of us.
Beneath every protective emotion is a deeper need asking to be seen, felt, and understood.
In this image, Isabel represents the Outer Child expressing anger as a protective emotion.
Standing behind her is my own Outer Child.
And hidden behind both of us is the Inner Child, the little girl who feels sad, scared, alone, unseen, and disconnected.
My commitment as a mother is not perfection (though I can subconsciously strive for it sometimes)...
My commitment is presence.
To meet her anger with compassion.
To create enough safety for what is underneath it to emerge.
This is why inner child healing work is so powerful.
When we meet ourselves in this way, we become less reactive, more compassionate, and more conscious in how we show up for others.
And in doing so, we interrupt generational patterns.
Healing isn't just personal.
It's collective.
Every time we choose awareness over reaction, we raise the vibration of ourselves, our families, and humanity.
What protective emotion shows up most strongly for you when your Inner Child feels hurt, rejected, unsafe, or unseen?
