The Inspired Mind Counselling & Psychotherapy

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The Inspired Mind Counselling & Psychotherapy

The Inspired Mind is a private practice in Adelaide offering counselling to women and teens.

29/04/2025

Ever taken the blame when you know it's not your fault?

There can be lots of reasons why someone might take responsibility for something. It might be to keep the peace, it could be to avoid getting caught up in arguments or to save someone's feelings. When you're a people pleaser, taking the blame becomes an automatic reaction, one we've learned as a survival mechanism. It became easier to accept fault, blame or imperfection than to question the behaviour of others around us. And this belief can become so entrenched that we truly believe we are the ones to blame, in every situation. 'Oh that must have been my mistake,' we say, 'I'm sure I got it wrong,' or 'silly me, I'm always screwing things up!'

Taking the blame in the moment might feel like an easy way to avoid confrontation or manage others' feelings but the sad truth is we abandon ourselves when we do so. We abandon our own feelings, our self-worth and our boundaries. And this leaves us feeling angry, frustrated and trapped.

If this resonates with you and you'd like to learn how to develop healthier boundaries, download my FREE Boundary Builder tool below 👇

https://lnkd.in/gUkHDreh

24/04/2025

What's your love language? Mine is words of affirmation. 😊

If you're not familiar with the term love language, it's a term coined by Gary Chapman in his book The Five Love Languages. He suggests there are five love languages: acts of service, quality time, receiving gifts, physical touch and words of affirmation.

As a people pleaser, I have always basked in the glow of a compliment. Even the smallest 'well done' would make my day. And for many people pleasers, we look for this external validation to get our needs met. Even going so far as to see some of our relationships as more deep or serious than they really are, or excusing bad behaviour within these relationships because the idea of asking for our needs to be met is so terrifying, we choose to hang on someone's every word as validation for our 'goodness'.

Take a look at the statements below. If any of them resonate with you and you'd like to learn how to develop internal validation and a stronger sense of self, download my FREE Boundary Builder tool below 👇

https://lnkd.in/gUkHDreh

15/04/2025

They say empathy is a super power but with great power, comes great responsibility (yes, that is a Spiderman quote!)

For people pleasers, we can struggle to draw a line between what is our responsibility and what is not.

Take for example a disagreement. Many people could witness others debating, even an arguing and not feel the need to step in and smooth things over. But for people pleasers, the idea of a conversation feeling uncomfortable, the possibility of someone's feelings getting hurt or heaven forbid, someone being offended, fills them which such discomfort, they feel compelled to step in and rescue, manage or diffuse. It might sound like great peacemaking skills but whose feelings are they really saving?

One of the hardest acts of acceptance for a people pleaser is the idea that their actions may seem selfless but in reality, they are behaving that way to avoid their own discomfort.

If this sounds familiar and you'd like to learn how to develop healthier boundaries, download your FREE Boundary Builder Guide here 👇

https://lnkd.in/gUkHDreh

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01/04/2025

Rejection is one of the most painful emotions and most of us will do anything to avoid it. For people pleasers, the concept of rejection has become our cryptonite, an experience (or series of experiences) that shaped our childhood. In order to manage this rejection, we learnt to please, to make the lives of others around us easier, in the hope we could keep them happy and wouldn't continue to reject or leave us. By keeping others happy, we learnt to reject ourselves. This behaviour may well have worked, but like any maladaptive behaviour, there comes a time when it stops working and starts hurting.

If this sounds familiar and you'd like to learn how to stop rejecting and start choosing yourself, visit https://theinspiredmind.com.au/recovering-people-pleaser.../

25/03/2025

I need to confess something...I have abandonment issues - with myself...

You're probably wondering what that looks like - and how I could do that to myself but before I explain, I first want to point out that for a long time, I didn't even know I was doing it. No wonder I always felt so frustrated and angry! 🤯

So what does abandoning yourself look like? It looks like putting others needs above our own - and thinking we are being kind and caring. It looks like brushing off people's well meaning advice because we tell ourselves we don't have it bad enough to need to make changes. And it looks like feeling too scared to speak up for ourselves because we tell ourselves we'll look selfish if we do so.

If any of this sounds familiar and you'd like to learn how to stop abandoning yourself, visit https://theinspiredmind.com.au/recovering-people-pleaser-course/

21/03/2025

If you're a people pleaser (or you suspect you might be one) you need to read this...

Most people pleaser's behaviour works at an unconscious level, meaning they're not always aware of the underlying motivations driving them. It may sound hard to believe that you could be motivated to do well by the thought of receiving compliments or being recognised as a good person - but that's exactly what external validation looks like. It's a learnt behaviour. And it takes away your power. But there is good news! Anything that can be learnt can be unlearnt and replaced with conscious behaviours that give you more control and autonomy.

Want to know more? Visit https://theinspiredmind.com.au/recovering-people-pleaser-course/

11/03/2025

How well do you protect your boundaries? If you're a people pleaser, the answer may well be, not very well. 😊 Many pleasers don't know what their boundaries are, let alone have the plans in place to action them. If you find yourself resonating with any of the behaviours described below and you'd like to learn more about what boundaries look like and how you can start incorporating them into your life, click the link below 👇
https://theinspiredmind.com.au/recovering-people-pleaser-course/

04/03/2025

Let's talk about the top 3 mistakes people pleasers are making - and how it's damaging your self-esteem...

1. You abandon yourself for the comfort of others.
2. You're so focused on the needs of others, you don't even know what your own needs are.
3. You believe pleasing others makes you a good person but it's creating anxiety, exhaustion and self-esteem issues.

If you'd like to learn how to stop people pleasing, download my Recovering People Pleaser Course today by clicking the link here https://theinspiredmind.com.au/recovering-people-pleaser-course/ or keep following me for more insight and support.

25/02/2025

3 ways you avoid confrontation - and how it's hurting your self-esteem...
1. You agree with people, even when you have a different opinion and their opinion hurts or discriminates against you.
2. You see yourself as an empath who understands everyone whilst leaving no room for your own feelings.
3. You believe good people don't start fights so never stick up for yourself.
By staying silent, whether that's to keep the peace or avoid uncomfortable feelings, you might be staying in your comfort zone but you're not allowing yourself a voice. And when we have no voice, we can feel frustrated, hurt and ignored which ultimately impacts our self-esteem.
If you'd like to learn how to start managing your people pleasing, start following for insight, ideas and support.

18/02/2025

Is the word NO not in your vocabulary? Would you like to learn how to say no without the guilt? Click here 👇to find out how https://theinspiredmind.com.au/recovering-people-pleaser-course/

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Opening Hours

Tuesday	14:00 - 19:30
Thursday	14:00 - 19:30
Friday	09:00 - 13:00
Saturday	09:00 - 13:00

Telephone

+61481573826

Website

https://theinspiredmind.com.au/recovering-people-pleaser-course/

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