16/06/2026
When my kids were little and we would go to the park, like all the other Mum's I would sit and watch them play, pushing them on the swing and watch as they ran around.
Always self-conscious of my size and weight I had joined a fitness program for Mum's and the organiser would encourage us to take photos of us exercising and post into the group to encourage other Mum's to do the same.
We took a holiday and we were walking through a park that had bridges, various birds and there I was trying to take a selfie of me walking whilst I was on holiday to prove to other people that I was dedicated to doing exercise and keeping healthy. It was in that moment that I went this isn't how I want to do life. I put my phone away and stopped and enjoyed the moment of being with my family.
Then we headed to a big park, off the kids went and I stayed with my husband watching the kids, but this park looked amazing and I wanted to enjoy the moment, I wanted to shift from watching on to participating. I wanted to try a slide, I found one at the park where no one could see me and the kids were running everywhere so had no idea I wasn't even on the playground.
Next minute I was sitting on top of that slide telling myself, I just don't think I can, I don't think I can slide down there, what if I get stuck, they are going to have to get a fire truck to cut me out and people will laugh at me. I sat there for what felt like an eternity, my kids came and then my husband, then my 3 year old boy says "Mum it's ok I will wescue you" There was no way I was going to have my 3 year old wescue me and I pushed myself off.
My heart thudded so hard inside my chest, it felt like the biggest slide in the world, but when I got to the bottom my grin was huge, my kids were cheering and I jumped up and ran back up to the top and had another go. We giggled and laughed and then my husband was the one who said, "We need to go and organise dinner."
We got back from holidays and we went to the park and we went on the open slides and then my son wanted to do the twisty covered one. I sat there and thought to myself well hopefully the firemen are hot and went down the slide.
We tried every slide in town, the flying foxes and even the mouse wheel and I stopped caring that other people would laugh at me, because I was out there living and enjoying and making memories with my kids, whilst they all sat and stared.
Why they sat and stared I do not know, we all have our own thoughts and fears, its when those thoughts and fears stop us from living that it might be time to get some help.