03/05/2026
Today felt like an exhale 🤍
It’s been almost two weeks since my mom passed, and alongside that grief I’ve also been holding the loss of my sweet dog Emma. My heart has been carrying a lot.
Today, I returned to a place that has held me through so many chapters of my life — gathering in ceremony to honour Beltane, creating smudging wands, sharing a delicious handmade meal prepared with so much intention, and ending the afternoon in a deeply soothing soundbath ✨️
There was something so healing about working with my hands — weaving together wood, leather, and feathers… gently piecing parts of myself back together 🪶
I shared the day with a dear friend — one of those soul connections that feels like such a blessing 🙏
A beautiful sign… 🕊️
I had been quietly holding that the Blue Jay would be a sign from my mom — I was patiently waiting.
After choosing our spots, I noticed my friend’s pillow was covered in tiny blue birds. Not quite Blue Jays, but enough to catch my attention.
Later, during the workshop, Melissa, our guide, passed around her smudging wand. Just before it reached me, someone asked if it had a Blue Jay feather. She said yes — she had found two and added them in.
When the wand was placed in my hands, I just knew. I had felt my mom’s presence during meditation moments before… and this felt like confirmation.
A little while later, as we sat crafting, I shared that the Blue Jay would be my mom’s sign. Without hesitation, Melissa removed the two feathers from her wand and gave them to me — one for my mom and one for me.
It touched me deeply. I was brought to tears.
So much kindness. So much love. So much connection 💓
For the first time in a while, my nervous system softened. I could breathe deeply again.
Grief is tender and layered… but today reminded me that there is still beauty, still connection, still moments of light within it all.
Holding so much love for my mom and my sweet girl Emma 🤍
And so much gratitude for the signs that find us when we need them most.
