Mary Klovance Consulting & Public Speaking

Mary Klovance Consulting & Public Speaking Go-to keynote speaker on neurodiversity-affirming care in schools, families, workplaces, and community settings.

Award-winning counsellor and consultant delivering pro-d workshops and presentations to support neurodivergent children, teens, and adults.

08/18/2026

The biggest mistake we often make when our child comes to us with a problem or big feelings?

We jump straight into problem-solving.

We want to fix it. Give advice. Tell them what they should do next so they stop hurting.

But sometimes, our kids don’t need us to fix anything yet. They need us to sit in the muck with them. 💛

Before solutions, we want them to feel heard, accepted, loved and understood.

Here’s how:

STEP 1: Ask questions. 🗣️

Get curious and stay in their story.

✨ “And then what happened?”
✨ “How did that make you feel?”
✨ “What did you do next?”
✨ “What happened after that?”

You’re not interrogating or trying to find the solution—you’re communicating: I care about what happened to you. I’m here. Keep telling me.

STEP 2: Validate with empathy. ❤️

Once you understand their experience, support the feelings underneath it.

✨ “Wow, that must have been really hard.”
✨ “I can understand why you felt so upset.”
✨ “That sounds really disappointing.”
✨ “It makes sense that you’d feel that way.”

Validation doesn’t mean you agree with everything they did or said. It means you’re communicating that their emotional experience makes sense.

There will be time for problem-solving later.

First, sit in the muck. Listen. Get curious. Validate.

Because when our kids feel truly heard and understood, then they’re much more likely to let us help. 💛

Want me to dig deeper into this? 👇

Tell me in the comments: What part of “sitting in the muck” feels hardest for you? Is it knowing what questions to ask? Validating feelings when you don’t agree? Resisting the urge to fix it? Knowing when it’s finally time to problem-solve?

Or tell me what video would help you get better at sitting in the muck with your child. I’ll use your answers to create my next reels. 🎥💛

08/06/2026

✨ I am beyond excited to share that HELD: A Group for Mothers of Neurodivergent Children is officially FULL after only two weeks! 🤍

To me, this says something incredibly important: mothers of neurodivergent children are carrying so much, and they are craving spaces where they feel understood, supported, and don’t have to do it all alone.

I can’t wait to walk alongside these amazing women over the coming months. 💛

If you were hoping to join us, don’t worry—we’ve opened a waitlist and are already exploring the possibility of running a second cohort due to the overwhelming interest. Be sure to join the waitlist through the link in our bio/website so you don’t miss out!

07/30/2026

One of the hardest lessons I’ve had to learn is this:

Understanding doesn’t automatically lead to agreement.

Sometimes, we keep explaining ourselves over and over because we’re hoping that if we just find the right words, the other person will finally see our perspective and agree with us.

But here’s the thing: someone can fully understand where you’re coming from… and still disagree.

When you keep trying to convince someone after they’ve already understood you, it often has the opposite effect. Most people don’t like feeling pressured or persuaded, and the more we push, the more they may pull away.

Your job isn’t to make everyone agree with you. Your job is to communicate your truth clearly and respectfully. After that, allow others the freedom to have their own perspective—even if it’s different from yours.

Healthy relationships aren’t built on always agreeing. They’re built on mutual respect, curiosity, and allowing each other to think differently without trying to force a different outcome.

Sometimes the most regulated thing we can do is say, “I’ve explained my perspective, and it’s okay if we don’t see this the same way.” ❤️

✨ Have you ever caught yourself over-explaining because you wanted to feel understood?

✨ I’m so excited to share that I’ll be presenting at the upcoming Gather Women’s Retreat hosted by Grow Wild Retreats ✨...
05/16/2026

✨ I’m so excited to share that I’ll be presenting at the upcoming Gather Women’s Retreat hosted by Grow Wild Retreats ✨

📍 Shawnigan Lake, BC
🗓️ August 1–3

I’ll be facilitating a women’s circle called Celebrating the Neurodivergent Woman — a space created for neurodivergent women to connect, reflect, feel seen, and honour the unique ways we move through the world. 💛

Together, we’ll explore:
✨ authenticity & unmasking
✨ nervous system awareness
✨ connection & belonging
✨ the strengths and struggles of being a neurodivergent woman
✨ what healing can look like in affirming community

As a neurodivergent woman myself, this offering is incredibly close to my heart. It means so much to be part of a retreat that values community, growth, reflection, and creating space for women to show up fully as themselves.

This retreat looks absolutely beautiful and includes an incredible lineup of offerings, workshops, movement, connection, and opportunities for rest and healing in nature.

🌿 Learn more or register here:
https://www.growwildretreats.com/gather

04/08/2026

You can’t make a child do anything.
And the more you try… the more resistance you get.

Especially with neurodivergent kids.

✨ The shift?
Stop focusing on control → start focusing on connection + direction

Instead of:
“Just do your homework.”

Try this 👇
“What’s something you want right now?”

💡 They want money → they need a job
💡 To get a job → they need a resume
💡 To write a resume → they need English skills
💡 To build that → what’s ONE assignment you can do today?

Now it feels doable.
Now it feels theirs.
Now you’ve got momentum.

Same with:
🧠 “I want to be more organized” → start with ONE drawer
🧠 “I want better grades” → start with ONE task
🧠 “I want independence” → start with ONE small step

This is how we support executive functioning without power struggles.

👉 Break it down
👉 Make it achievable
👉 Build momentum

That’s where the magic happens.

Let me know in the comments how this worked for you or if you have any questions.

Follow for more neurodiversity-affirming parenting & support 💛

⸻

04/03/2026

Sleep & ADHD – Why It’s Tough & How Food Plays a Role 🌙✨

Hey friends! ADHD often affects our sleep, whether it’s falling asleep or staying asleep. 😴 But did you know eating right before bed could make it harder? When you snack late, it can trigger hormone shifts, sugar spikes, and energy fluctuations that tell your body, “Hey, we’re still in energy mode!” when you’re trying to wind down. 🛌

I’m not a doctor or nutritionist—so do your own research—but giving yourself at least an hour after your last bite can help signal your body: “It’s time to rest.” 🌛 Let’s get that sleep routine on point! 🧠💤

03/26/2026

✨ I have THREE book ideas in my heart right now and I need your help deciding where to start…

1️⃣ A book for late-diagnosed ADHD women — the grief, the relief, the identity shifts, and learning how to finally work with your brain instead of against it.

2️⃣ A book for ADHD moms raising neurodivergent kids — real-life, compassionate, neurodiversity-affirming parenting without the pressure to “fix” your child while also navigating your own brain.

3️⃣ A more “woo-woo” workbook — think inner child healing, shadow work, and powerful journaling prompts ✨
→ This could be a standalone or something that pairs with either of the other books.

Honestly… I feel lit up by ALL of them 🔥
But I want to create what will support YOU the most.

💬 Tell me:
Which one would you read first?
Which one do you need right now?

Your voice will help shape what comes next 🤍

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Victoria, BC
V0S, V8N-V8Z, V9A-V9E

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