Magpie Counselling

26/08/2026

More tea and CPD…

Two hours of in-person safeguarding training yesterday and apparently this is who I become when somebody starts asking the room questions. My inner Monica was unleashed.

Hand straight up. Knows the answer. Trying very hard to give somebody else a turn while internally screaming I KNOW THIS ONE…..mortifying 🫠

More importantly, I was genuinely relieved to hear unconscious bias being properly talked about in safeguarding. We all have bias. Of course we do. We’ve spent however many years being shaped by our families, communities, education, experiences, culture, the media, the people we’ve met and probably a whole load of stuff we aren’t even aware has lodged itself in there.

Professional training doesn’t suddenly scrub all of that out of us. We can know the procedures, recognise the signs and know exactly where a safeguarding concern needs to go, but there’s another bit of the work that I think deserves just as much attention. Looking at ourselves.

What have I already decided about this person without realising it? Who am I more inclined to believe? What behaviour am I reading as threatening, difficult or concerning? Would I be having the same reaction if the person in front of me were a different age, gender or class? If they spoke differently? Had more money? Less money? Had a diagnosis attached to their name? It’s uncomfortable stuff. It should be really.

Unconscious bias isn’t something that belongs to other people. We all have it. I’m far more interested in being curious about mine, where it might have come from and how it might affect the way I see somebody. Anyway. Excellent training. Learnt plenty and managed, with considerable personal sacrifice, not to answer every question.

Monica would have been appalled.

14/08/2026

A lovely new local venture from a friend and fellow counsellor…

Space to Be Together is bringing local counsellors, therapists and psychotherapists together for coffee, conversation and a bit of connection outside the therapy room.

Such a good idea, and one I’m very happy to give a little Magpie shout-out to

☕ Space to Be Together – Therapist Coffee Mornings

It’s getting close! The first Space to Be Together coffee morning is just around the corner, and I’m really excited to finally see this idea starting to come to life.

We’ve already got a lovely group booked in for August, and I’m really looking forward to bringing local therapists, counsellors and psychotherapists together for a relaxed morning of coffee, conversation and connection at Midgar Cafe in Bury St Edmunds.

And because I know one date won’t work for everyone, I’ve now opened bookings for the next one too:

📅 Thursday 24th September
⏰ 10am
📍 Midgar Cafe, Bury St Edmunds

I’m trialling different days of the week to see what works best and hopefully make these mornings accessible to more people.

Whether you’re a student, newly qualified, have years of experience, or are somewhere in between, you’re very welcome. The idea is simply to have a space to meet other people who understand this work, share experiences, have a chat and hopefully build some supportive connections along the way.

You can come along to the August or September coffee morning — or both if you fancy it!

Full details and booking information are available here:
https://buytickets.at/spacetobetogether

And if you know a local therapist, counsellor or psychotherapist who might appreciate something like this, please feel free to share this with them.

I’m really looking forward to seeing what we can build together.

14/08/2026

Notes from the Mop Handle

I haven’t posted much recently and, frankly, I haven’t had the capacity.

When I was training, I spent four years with my head in a book or staring at a laptop, furiously swearing while trying to find evidence to back up whatever I’d just written. When I finished, that didn’t really stop. I’d become slightly addicted to information. There was always another book, another paper, another bit of CPD, another rabbit hole to disappear down.

I think somewhere along the way I’d convinced myself that if I wasn’t constantly reading and learning, I was doing the people who trusted me with their stories a disservice. But I’d forgotten to look up.

So this summer I made a conscious decision to look at my family. Their actual faces. To listen when they spoke to me rather than responding with vague grunts while my head remained down. To actually be there with the people I love. And that’s where capacity comes in.

This platform has been incredible for my little practice and has been a genuine tool in reaching people who have eventually chosen to come and work with me. But it’s also a bit of a minefield. My posts are relatively short, yet they can take me bloody ages to write.

Part of that is because I’m careful about language. There’s been plenty in the news lately about the language used in the mental health profession, qualifications, titles and people overstating their credentials. It’s made me think even more about what I put out publicly and what somebody might reasonably take from it.
But there has to be a point where I shut the laptop.

I haven’t stopped reading or disappeared from the occasional rabbit hole. I’m just learning that I don’t have to fill every spare bit of my brain with something useful. Last night I looked up and saw this. My actual response was, “This sky is making me daydream about being in a music video. God, I’m a show pony.” So perhaps replenishing our capacity doesn’t always have to be particularly profound.

Sometimes I gather my thoughts with a book. Sometimes with a mop in my hand. Sometimes talking absolute rubbish with the people I love. And sometimes apparently by staring dramatically out to sea imagining there’s a camera crew involved.

Where do you gather yours?

04/08/2026

More Tea and CPD ☕️

This week’s glamorous line-up includes safeguarding, GDPR, data protection, Prevent Duty and fire safety.

In the interests of full transparency, I find this sort of training unbearably dry. Give me attachment theory, coercive control, the psychology of shame or what makes us human, and I’m all in. Ask me to spend the afternoon clicking through data protection modules and suddenly I’m looking at the garden wondering if the fence needs repainting. It’s also reassuring to know that, despite an untold amount of personal therapy, I can still procrastinate like an absolute boss.

That said, these aren’t the exciting parts of being a counsellor, but they are important ones. Good practice isn’t just about what happens in the counselling room. It’s also about making sure people’s information is handled properly, safeguarding responsibilities are up to date and the less glamorous parts of the job are taken seriously.

P.S. I have a couple of counselling spaces becoming available over the coming weeks. If you’ve been thinking about getting in touch, you’re very welcome to arrange a free 15-minute telephone consultation to see whether I’m the right counsellor for you.

P.P.S. Yes, that’s a Wispa Gold for breakfast. It’s medicinal, obviously.

17/07/2026

Notes from the Mop Handle

My daughter has been watching reruns of Geordie Shore. I may or may not have found myself sitting down to watch a few episodes too. Before anyone questions my life choices…

It got me thinking about group dynamics.
Then I remembered an episode of Friends. Chandler has the least amount of screen time during one of the Thanksgiving episodes and yet somehow manages to cause the biggest upset.

When I was at university, we analysed that episode as a group. One of our lecturers considered group dynamics his holy grail. He had this remarkable ability to pause almost any film or television programme and show us that what looked like one person’s behaviour was often telling us something about the group as a whole.

Looking back, Chandler wasn’t really the story. His comment simply landed in the middle of a group already carrying years of history, assumptions, loyalties, hurt and unspoken feelings. It made me wonder how often that happens in real life. Groups are fascinating.

Whether it’s a family, a friendship group, a workplace or a reality TV cast, they often settle into a kind of equilibrium. Not necessarily a healthy one or an unhealthy one. Just a balance. People quietly adopt roles without ever agreeing to them. The funny one. The dependable one. The peacekeeper. The rebel. The one who’s “too sensitive”. The one who always smooths things over. The role almost becomes more important than the person.

When someone behaves outside the role they’ve been assigned, the group often wobbles. Not because anyone is malicious, but because systems naturally try to restore equilibrium. We like predictability. We like knowing where everyone fits. I also wonder whether we spend too much time responding to the headline and not enough time understanding the article underneath. “She shouted.” “He was rude.” “She overreacted.” Those become the headlines.

But underneath there might be shame, fear, grief, loneliness, a lifetime of not feeling heard. It’s remarkable how often one wounded part is speaking to another wounded part, while both are trying desperately not to feel wounded at all. Then comes the part I find most interesting; the apparent repair. The apology. The hug. The agreement to move on. And then, almost without noticing, the group splinters into smaller conversations.

The story is revisited. People look for reassurance that they weren’t the one in the wrong. Another perspective is added. Someone remembers something from six months ago. Someone who wasn’t even involved offers an opinion. Not necessarily out of spite. Sometimes because sitting with the possibility that we’ve hurt someone can stir up shame that’s incredibly difficult to tolerate. Our ego naturally wants somewhere to put that discomfort. And I wonder if that’s how the elephant begins to grow.

Not because of the original disagreement, but because of everything that happens afterwards. Healing a rupture asks something incredibly difficult of all of us.
The courage to stay curious when certainty feels safer. The courage to hear another person’s hurt without immediately protecting our own. And perhaps hardest of all, the courage to tolerate the uncomfortable truth that we can be decent people, with good intentions, and still misunderstand one another.

I wonder whether real repair begins the moment we stop asking, “Who was right?” and start asking, “What happened between us?”

16/07/2026

☕️ 🍰 🍵 🧁

🤍 Because those who hold space for others deserve a space to be together.

Working as a therapist is deeply meaningful- but it can also be surprisingly isolating.

Whether you’re still in training, newly qualified, building a private practice, working within the NHS or voluntary sector, or have years of experience behind you, we all deserve spaces where we can connect with people who truly understand the work we do.

Space to Be Together is a relaxed monthly coffee morning created especially for counsellors, psychotherapists, trainees and other mental health professionals.

This isn’t a networking event or a CPD workshop.

It’s simply an opportunity to step away from your professional role for a couple of hours, enjoy a great coffee, have meaningful conversations and become part of a supportive local community.

✨ Meet fellow therapists from across Suffolk.
✨ Share experiences in a welcoming, informal setting.
✨ Build friendships, referral relationships and professional connections.
✨ Hear about future coffee mornings, peer reflection groups, CPD opportunities and social events as the community grows.

📍 Midgar Café
📅 25th August 2026
🕙 10am - 12 pm

Places are intentionally limited to 20 attendees to help create a relaxed, personal atmosphere where everyone has the opportunity to get to know one another.

Your contribution helps support the continued growth of this community, with a proportion of every booking also being donated to environmental initiatives- reflecting Space to Be Together’s commitment to caring for both people and planet.

If this sounds like something you’ve been looking for, I’d love to welcome you.

🎟️ Book your place here:
https://buytickets.at/spacetobetogether/2312259

Please feel free to share this with any counsellors, psychotherapists, trainees or other mental health professionals who you think might enjoy coming along.

Psychotherapy MentalHealthProfessionals HelpingProfessionals PeerSupport Wellbeing PrivatePractice NHS VoluntarySector Suffolk BuryStEdmunds TherapistLife

10/07/2026

Sweetie darling… another fabulous business is moving into The Harvey Adams Enterprise Centre.

Neon Nostalgia is opening its doors soon and, from what I’ve seen already, it’s giving me unapologetic Edina Monsoon energy… colourful, quirky and impossible to ignore.

Claire is also the creative talent behind Face It- Face Painting Suffolk, so if you’ve ever seen her work you’ll already know she has a brilliant eye for colour and creativity. I have no doubt this new venture will be every bit as full of personality.

If you’re partial to vintage finds, bold prints and a little bit of glorious nostalgia, pop over and give Neon Nostalgia a like and follow. You’ll be able to keep up with the opening date, offers and all the fabulous treasures heading into the boutique.

I absolutely love seeing independent businesses taking the leap and creating something that’s unmistakably them. Wishing Claire every success with her new adventure.

09/07/2026

The last few weeks have brought a real flurry of new enquiries and new people through my door. Every time someone chooses to trust me with their story, I never take it for granted. What has really struck me is where those enquiries have come from. “A friend mentioned your page.” “I saw one of your posts.” “Someone invited me to follow your page.” “ I found your website.”

It might seem like a small thing when you like a post, leave a comment, share something that resonated with you or mention Magpie Counselling to someone you care about, but those quiet acts of support have helped build this little practice more than you probably realise.

So, thank you. Thank you to the people who trust me enough to walk through my door, and thank you to everyone who quietly champions my work behind the scenes. You’re helping me build the kind of practice I always hoped I could.

If you’ve been wondering whether counselling might be right for you, you’re always welcome to get in touch for a chat. There’s never any pressure, just an opportunity to see whether working together feels like the right fit.

I shared the news with my soon-to-be office companion, Rocket…

He was completely unmoved.

04/07/2026

Notes from the mop handle: There’s quite a bit of discussion in the counselling world about gifts.

Should therapists accept them? Does the cost matter? What does accepting, or declining, a gift communicate? Ethical guidance exists for good reasons, and every therapist has to think carefully about those questions.

When I was training, I remember feeling awkward when someone wanted to give me something at the end of our work together. At first, all I could see was the ethical dilemma. Then, over time, I started to wonder about something else. Sometimes a gift isn’t really about the object at all.

I became less interested in the gift itself and more curious about what it might represent. Perhaps it carries the thought that went into choosing it. Perhaps it’s a way of saying thank you that feels more comfortable than words alone. Perhaps it’s simply one of the many ways people make sense of an ending. If therapy has been about someone reconnecting with parts of themselves that have spent years feeling unseen, I found myself wondering what it might feel like if that offering was met with, “I’m sorry, I can’t accept that.”

I’m not suggesting that giving your therapist a gift is the “right” way to end therapy. It isn’t expected, and it certainly isn’t necessary. For me, one of the greatest privileges is witnessing someone leave with a stronger sense of themselves than when they arrived. Whether they leave with a smile, a quiet goodbye, a handwritten card, or occasionally a small gift, each ending seems to carry its own meaning.

The flowers in this photo remind me of all the different ways people mark the end of therapy. The flowers are easy to photograph. Everything else remains theirs. Moments like these remind me what an extraordinary privilege this work is. To be invited into someone’s world for a little while, and to witness their courage, their setbacks, their humour, their grief, and their growth, is something I never want to take for granted.

What I’ve come to appreciate is that, more often than not, the meaning behind these moments matters far more than the object itself. Sometimes what is being offered isn’t simply a present. Perhaps it’s a way of saying, “This mattered.”

03/07/2026

Meet Rocket. The goodest good boy in all the land.

He’ll soon be joining me at Magpie Counselling, where he’ll be assisting with metaphors and whatnot. His particular areas of expertise include convincing people to take a walk, reminding us that naps are rarely a terrible idea, and demonstrating unwavering enthusiasm for the people he loves.

He also has a slightly complicated professional relationship with cats, so we’re choosing not to dwell on that part of his CV. Like the rest of us, he isn’t perfect.
He just turns up as himself every day. And I think that’s a pretty good place to start.