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Confidence can take a knock for all sorts of reasons.A difficult conversation.A setback.A mistake.A comment that catches...
05/06/2026

Confidence can take a knock for all sorts of reasons.

A difficult conversation.
A setback.
A mistake.
A comment that catches us off guard.
A situation that matters more than we’d like it to.

When that happens, I don’t tend to ask myself, “How do I become more confident?”

I ask, “What do I need right now?”

For me, it’s often one of the things in this post.

✏️ Writing things down until I can see what’s really going on.

🗣️ Talking it through with someone I trust.

☀️ Getting outside and letting fresh air and daylight do their thing.

🧘 Stretching, breathing and reconnecting with my body.

❤️ Speaking to myself with a little more fairness and a little less criticism.

None of these magically solve the problem.

They simply help me return to myself.

And from there, I usually find that confidence was never as far away as I thought.

I’d love to know what’s in your confidence first aid kit. ⛑️ ⬇️

04/06/2026

This came from a participant at my Hold the Room workshop last night (thank you!) and I thought it made a great journal prompt.

✏️ Where in your life is there currently a gap between your intent and your impact?

Maybe you’re trying to be calm but coming across as abrupt.

Maybe you’re trying to be clear but finding yourself over-explaining.

Maybe you’re trying to set a boundary but it arrives wrapped in apology.

Maybe you’re trying to connect but somehow ending up distant.

Often the issue isn’t a lack of intention. We know what we want to say. We know how we’d like to show up.

The challenge is that pressure changes things.

When we’re stressed, rushed, overwhelmed or feeling exposed, our nervous system can pull us away from our original intention and towards protection.

That’s why awareness matters.

Not so we can criticise ourselves after the event but so we can better understand what happens when the pressure is on and make choices!

Because the smaller that gap becomes, the more likely it is that people experience us as we intended.

I’d love to know what came up for you when you reflected on this question.

Last night’s Hold the Room workshop left me with a phrase that one of the participants shared:“The gap between intent an...
04/06/2026

Last night’s Hold the Room workshop left me with a phrase that one of the participants shared:

“The gap between intent and impact.”

We spent the evening exploring confidence in high-pressure situations and that phrase seemed to capture so much of what we were discussing.

We often enter a conversation, presentation, meeting or boundary-setting moment with a clear intention. We know what we want to say. We know how we want to come across.

Yet when pressure arrives, our nervous system has other ideas. 🫩

We rush.
We over-explain.
We become defensive.
We stay silent.

Where is that shiny version of ourselves that we had hoped would show up?

The result can be a gap between what we intended and the impact we actually had.

Last night we explored what happens under pressure, how the nervous system influences our communication and some practical ways of staying connected to ourselves when it matters most.

A huge thank you to a wonderful group who brought openness, curiosity and thoughtful reflection to the session. Zero photos. Fully engaged!

This is very much the territory of Projected Confidence for me. Those moments when we are visible, speaking, leading, facilitating, teaching, setting boundaries or navigating difficult conversations.

If this topic resonates and you’d like to explore it further, whether through coaching, workshops or workplace training, feel free to get in touch.

Do you know what I admire about you?It certainly isn’t your inbox. Or how many hours you worked this week. Or how many b...
02/06/2026

Do you know what I admire about you?

It certainly isn’t your inbox. Or how many hours you worked this week. Or how many boxes you ticked off your to-do list at 5am this morning.

We’ve become very good at celebrating exhaustion.

“I’m so busy.”
“I’m flat out.”
“I haven’t stopped.”

They’re often offered as badges of honour. Evidence that we’re useful, successful, important.

I bet if I sat down with someone who mattered to you and asked them what they loved most about you, I doubt they’d say:

“Do you know what, Gemma…They are brilliant at answering emails.”

They’d probably talk about your kindness.
Your humour.
Your sensitivity.
The way you listen.
The way you make people feel.
Your curiosity.
Your courage.
The things that make you you.

Humans are fascinating creatures. We create. We contribute. We achieve. Those things can be deeply meaningful.

But your value DOES NOT begin and end with what you produce.

You are more than your output. More than your efficiency. More than the contents of your to-do list.

So here’s a question:

If work, productivity and achievement were taken off the table, what would you hope people admired about you?

👇 I’d love to hear your answer.

29/05/2026

Sometimes parents reach out feeling unsure whether coaching is the right step for their teenager and that makes complete sense.

I know it can feel vulnerable handing your young person over to somebody new and wondering whether they’ll open up, engage or even want to be there.

Discovery calls are simply a gentle starting point.
A chance to meet, ask questions and get a feel for whether the space feels comfortable for everybody involved.

There’s no pressure and no big commitment.
It really is just a conversation.

If you’d like a parent pack or teen pack with a bit more information about how coaching works, feel free to drop me a message and I’d be very happy to send one over 🤍

28/05/2026

We hear phrases like:
“Grab life with both hands.”
“Live life to the full.”
“Make the most of it.”

But what do those phrases actually mean to you?

Sometimes big sweeping ideas can accidentally leave us only noticing what’s missing. Like we should constantly be chasing BIGGER experiences, BIGGER achievements, BIGGER moments.

Maybe “grabbing life” for you looks adventurous and expansive. 🧗
Maybe it looks peaceful. 🧘
Maybe it looks like finally resting. 🛌
Maybe it looks like saying yes more often. 👍
Or saying no more honestly. 🙂‍↔️

Maybe it means feeling present enough to actually notice your own life while you’re in it.

Try pulling the phrase apart a little.

🟡Where did your definition come from?
🟡Who taught it to you?
🟡Does it genuinely fit you now?

You might discover that you’re already living it?

Maybe your version of a full life looks very different to somebody else’s. And that’s probably a good thing.

Enjoy your scribble x

A little “about me” for some of the newer faces around here 👋I’m Gemma.Confidence coach, mum, former actor, journal enth...
27/05/2026

A little “about me” for some of the newer faces around here 👋

I’m Gemma.
Confidence coach, mum, former actor, journal enthusiast and someone who is endlessly fascinated by people.

I work with adults, teenagers and workplaces helping them uncover a more comfortable, sustainable sense of confidence. The kind that feels grounded in who you are rather than something you have to perform or force.

A lot of my work is about slowing things down enough to actually hear yourself again. Understanding what sits underneath the pressure, the overthinking, the people pleasing or the self-doubt so you can move through life with more CHOICE, clarity and self-trust.

Outside of coaching I’m usually with my family, walking my very soppy Labrador, journalling, analysing human behaviour (far too deeply), getting excited by a really delicious conversation or swishing watercolours around. 🎨

Very glad you’re here 🤍



“Coaching is collaborative, not corrective.”This feels especially important when working with teenagers but matters acro...
26/05/2026

“Coaching is collaborative, not corrective.”

This feels especially important when working with teenagers but matters across the board.

A lot of young people already feel observed, assessed, advised, corrected or “worked on” from every angle. Whether that be from worried parents, concerned teachers, influential friends, the lure of social media. There is CONSTANT feedback.

So coaching needs to feel different.

I’m not there to tell a teenager who they should be or to lecture, diagnose or mould them into the “right” version of themselves because coaching is collaborative.

I am a thinking companion who can help them to shape thoughts, feelings and experiences into something more workable. I can help them to hear themselves more clearly and I am ever curious alongside them.

Sometimes young people simply need a space where they are allowed to slow down enough to notice what is actually going on for them so that things begin to make more sense.

DM me COLLABORATE if you want to start a coaching process for your teen.

I feel very strongly about this.I don’t believe confidence is handed out to a lucky few while the rest of us stand aroun...
25/05/2026

I feel very strongly about this.

I don’t believe confidence is handed out to a lucky few while the rest of us stand around hoping to stumble across it one day. I believe it’s already there.

I think life happens. Experiences happen. Comments stick. Pressure builds. We learn to protect ourselves. We adapt. We overthink. We disconnect from our own instincts a bit…or a lot.

And one day you realise that confidence feels really far away or inaccessible.

But inaccessible doesn’t mean absent.

A huge part of coaching for me is companioning people back towards themselves. Helping them uncover what’s already there underneath the noise and the self doubt and then supporting them to express that confidence in a way that feels natural and comfortable for them.

I don’t support ‘faking it til you make it’ or performing confidence or copying someone else’s version.

I fully support your version because it’s the one that feels grounded and sustainable and true to who you are.

DM me ‘CONFIDENCE’ if you want to find out more about coaching for you, your teen or your workplace.

The faster life gets, the easier it is to lose contact with yourself a bit.You stop noticing you’re tired.You stop notic...
24/05/2026

The faster life gets, the easier it is to lose contact with yourself a bit.

You stop noticing you’re tired.
You stop noticing your body is tense.
You stop noticing that little internal “actually I don’t want to do this” voice.
You react quickly instead of responding thoughtfully.
You run on autopilot.

And to be fair, modern life really does encourage speed.
Quick replies. Quick decisions. Quick content. Quick fixes. Constant noise. 🤯

But confidence and self-trust often need a bit more space than that.

Not loads necessarily but enough space to NOTICE.

Notice how something feels.
Notice what’s underneath the reaction.
Notice what you need.
Notice what keeps repeating.

Speed ⬇️ Awareness ⬆️ Choice ⬆️

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Cheadle Hulme

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