25/06/2026
We talk a lot about the importance of listening nowadays, especially when it comes to mental health. But lately, I’ve been thinking about how the kind of listening we need changes as we get older.
The incredible ladies I spend time with are in their 80s and 90s. Many of them navigate memory loss, but they still have so much to give. There are times when they look at me and tell me about things they want to do, tasks they want to take on, or ways they want to help out.
And too often, the world’s default reaction is to say, "Oh no, don't worry about that, I’ll do it for you."
I understand the logic. I know the people stepping in are doing it out of love, care, and the belief that they are protecting them from struggling. But it got me thinking... is it wrong to not even let them try?
When we take over completely, we accidentally take away their agency, their purpose, and their dignity.
Aren't we supposed to be there for support, rather than taking over? Support looks like standing by, holding the safety net, and letting someone try—even if it takes longer, even if it isn't perfect, and even if it’s just a small task.
True listening with our elders isn't just about hearing their words; it's about listening to their need to still feel capable, valuable, and alive. Let's give them the space to try. 🤍
What do you think? Have you noticed this with the older loved ones in your life?
