StubbornLeigh

StubbornLeigh One woman's attempt to navigate chronic health conditions, mental health issues, fitness, family, etc

This is relatable and such a tricky balance. I want to be honest with people, particularly if it might help someone els...
03/06/2026

This is relatable and such a tricky balance.

I want to be honest with people, particularly if it might help someone else.

But I also dont want to be complaining all the time.
And I dont want everyone knowing all the details of everything. Tbh I don't want to know all the details most of the time, particularly due to the current lack of medical support in my area which doesn't bode well for long term if I have to continue self managing with varying degrees of success as nobody knows what to do with me 🤷🏻‍♀️

People don't see me on the bad days and social media is a highlight reel rather than reality so someone who doesnt know me well could absolutely look at my normal feed and make unkind judgements and I dont want that but also dont have the bandwidth to defend myself. I just have to remind myself they dont see the before and after of me doing certain things. The fact I am held together and semi functioning due to lots of meds, supplements, naps, assorted other tricks and a huge amount of stubbornness isn't immediately obvious but I have to trust the people close to me aren't judging.

Also, never take on board someones opinion if you wouldnt take their advice!

I have felt like this and still do on occasions but I am coming to terms with the fact that keeping the flesh suit sort ...
16/05/2026

I have felt like this and still do on occasions but I am coming to terms with the fact that keeping the flesh suit sort of ticking along is pretty much a full time job and if it bothers other people, I really just have to let it be their problem and not mine.
Waste of my valuable energy to stress about it

Same! And I always discount the effect emotional exertion and stress has until it floors me. You would think I would k...
12/05/2026

Same! And I always discount the effect emotional exertion and stress has until it floors me. You would think I would know better by now 🤦🏻‍♀️

Slept most of the day and am currently lying in the dark with a heatpad on my arm and an icepack on my head feeling a bit sorry for myself and hoping it is a one day version because I have appointments tomorrow.

11/05/2026

This week (11th-17th May) is ME Awareness Week, a chance to raise awareness of the debilitating, multi-system condition Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (encephalopathy) also known to as Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS).

ME/CFS is a complex is a multi-system disease involving the brain, muscle, immune and neuroendocrine (hormone) systems and it affects over 400,000 people in the UK today, yet it is often misunderstood.
ME Awareness Week is vital in raising the profile of this disease, and a key part of the ME Association's objectives, as we work tirelessly to change attitudes in the hope this will improve the lives of the people with ME/CFS.

We encourage all those who are able, to use this week as an opportunity to share our posts with your colleagues, friends, and family - whether in-person or online - so the community they know that they are not alone.

Chronic illness is rubbish. Normal illness on top is rubbish.Your body making decisions for you is rubbish.Other people...
10/05/2026

Chronic illness is rubbish.
Normal illness on top is rubbish.
Your body making decisions for you is rubbish.
Other people making decisions for you or that affect you based on any of the above, no matter how reasonable and rational they are, yep you've guessed it - still rubbish.

Usually my feelings about it all are neatly in a box. I will talk about thing but manage to be sufficiently disconnected that it doesnt feel I am talking about me so dont have to deal with the emotional side (I've never been great with processing emotions healthily) but today they bubbled over and I had to feel feelings about a bunch of different things I had been avoiding (ngl, very muxh not my favourite thing to do). I am now mainly tea and biscuits because that felt like the appropriate way to process. Therapy is probably healthier and a better approach longterm but biscuits are cheaper!

Fingers crossed that tomorrow is a good day and letting all the emotions do their thing leaves me feeling lighter rather than triggering a flare because if it triggers a flare, I may cry and I refuse to cry two days in a row.

Finally getting round to listening to audiobook and make my own decision on it as I am currently sofabound and a little...
04/05/2026

Finally getting round to listening to audiobook and make my own decision on it as I am currently sofabound and a little groggy so audiobooks are the way to go.

She has just shared an adage that stuck with her "If you listen your body when it whispers, you wont have to hear it scream" and my stubborn chronically ill post-surgery self definitely needed that reminder today!!

03/05/2026

"If your pride is louder than your pain"??
Ouch, yep that resonates. Took me a long time to accept that a stick is required sometimes and its an issue that I have when other health related curveballs are chucked at me. I can acknowledge it now, working on it is taking a bit longer

01/05/2026

Turns out that, whilst I am usually ok-ish dealing with the chronic illness nonsense as I know how to manage it for the most part, I am increasingly rubbish at dealing with new illness. Having limited functional hours yet not being able to use them because something else is acting up doesnt feel right and is incredibly frustrating

I've been struggling a lot mentally with my body and its limitations recently. Lots of "I'm fine, I can do it, there's ...
22/04/2026

I've been struggling a lot mentally with my body and its limitations recently. Lots of "I'm fine, I can do it, there's nothing wrong" etc. The copious amounts of medication, supplements and appointments do kind of point to the contrary so rationally I acknowledge there is still some internalised ableism at play. But whoever said my rational mind was in charge?? Probably not anyone who has actually met me 😂

However the fact there was an audible squeal of joy when I realised I was in a room with a shower chair and enough room to do the physio with my stick going in various directions may be telling me something...

Brains are weird things. I am objectively not doing great right now but I can't stop trying to bingo myself 🤦🏻‍♀️Time to...
15/04/2026

Brains are weird things.
I am objectively not doing great right now but I can't stop trying to bingo myself 🤦🏻‍♀️

Time to breathe, reset and try to figure this nonsense out!

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