07/08/2026
TW - addiction, emotional abuse, homelessness, death
Writing the trigger warning as a list like that still makes me feel like I am describing an episode of a soap opera - but it actually happened to me.
It was over 20 years ago so it is surreal but I promised you I'd tell you my story one day, and this is just one chapter of a bigger book.
I was a naive 22 year old when I said I'd marry the father of my child - there was no proposal, we just booked in a date when we went to register our son's birth!
I had a panic attack before I walked down the aisle because my gut was telling me not to do it but I had no life experience to listen to it.
The stories I could tell you about what happened within the two years we were married, social media probably isn't the best place for that, maybe I will write that book one day?
But what it taught me was that marriage isn't something to just do because society tells you to.
I didn't even want to get married the second time as I was so scarred from my first one.
The thing that changed my mind?
Was being in a loving, healthy relationship plus I was more clued up on what that 'bit of paper' actually meant.
Would I change what happened to me and my son?
Probably not - it matured me quickly and I am the woman I am today because of that trauma.
I would change it for my son - he is still affected by it even though he was so young and has grown up with the traumatic lived experiences and without his Dad.
Bit heavy for a Friday in August but I was hoping you would all still be away on holiday like me!
Jade x