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Monday 10am - 5pm Tuesday 10am - 5pm Wednesday 10am - 5pm Thursday 10am - 5pm Friday 10am - 5pm

KCB Therapy

Integrative Counsellor || MA, Dip. MBACP
Adults | Expats | Mums | Teens 🏋️‍♀️

20/12/2023

There can be a dissonance between what is expected of us - to be JOLLY and LIGHT versus what we are actually feeling (dread, annoyance, fear, grief, overwhelm….). This gap between feeling and expectation can create what Sarah Ahmed called the ‘alien affect’. When we don’t fulfil the collective’s expectations to meet the moment - ie to be happy, then our real feelings are rejected as inappropriate. These kinds of moral repudiations are painful! And can cause us to feel rejected or wrong and split parts of ourselves off into our shadow...

Read on over here: https://www.kcbtherapy.com/blog/the-holiday-affect

18/12/2023

If you are averse to Christmas, it is worth asking ourselves, what is our implicit memory of Christmas growing up?

Do we remember it fondly? Was it consistent in its rituals and traditions? What was the felt sense anticipating it as a child?

For many people, this is where the resistance remains and we carry it over into adult life. This time of year is loaded for many of us. I feel you. Curious to explore more of what I call 'the holiday affect'? I've revived my blog from the attic here: https://www.kcbtherapy.com/blog/the-holiday-affect

24/02/2022

Many of my female clients take a long time to identify and name their anger. We disown it! As if it is a bad thing we don’t want to associate with – a stain on our name. A rash!

We use ‘discounting language’ to minimise our uncomfortable feelings. This puts a buffer between ourselves and how we show up in the world.

Over time, if we continue to deny our true feelings to put on a happy face to the outside world, our sorrows and disappointments build and turn into resentment.

Anger is a normal part of our humanity and when harnessed, it is a tool for real self-awareness.

22/02/2022

🌿 What is the stuff you are made of? Who are you in the family of things – a peacemaker, aka the middle child? A joker? The caretaker? The ‘sensitive one’?...

⭐Is there space for you in your relationships to express anger?

Interested to see how therapy could help you to become more self-aware? Send me a DM or fill out the contact form on my website:
https://www.kcbtherapy.com/contact

17/02/2022

💚 Sometimes we lose sight of how enmeshed we are with our children/spouses/mothers/family(!) and judge them rather than offering them the fullest expression of their humanity – to just be and feel and experience life fully.

💡 Notice what’s coming up for you when your child/spouse is feeling something you don’t approve up. Do you want to correct it? Do you wish to rescue them? Is it because you feel responsible for their happiness?

Helping women navigate motherhood and family dynamics is something I do in my online therapy sessions, To find out more about me and my services, you can visit my website and book an initial consultation to see if we might be a good fit,

15/02/2022

⛰️ For Jung, integrating the shadow or making the unconscious conscious is part of making us whole. It is not about banishing our parts - or by extension - ourselves into exile but to have a deeper self-understanding to see how all these parts can be of service to us and enrich our lives with meaning.

👉🏿 Check out my ruminations on the Shadow and more on my blog. CLICK HERE > https://www.kcbtherapy.com/reflections-on-covid-19

10/02/2022

Watch ourselves, listen to that inner misogynist inside of us…

🤎 The contempt and blame for women is centuries old. It’s part your inheritance but it’s not yours to keep.

⭐️How do you perceive femininity?

⭐️ What’s the difference between having opinions and asserting oneself?
The contempt and blame for women is centuries old. It’s part of your inheritance but it’s not yours to keep.
⭐️ When we disproportionately react to someone else’s attributes and character, it’s not really about that person. It’s about what’s gone underground in yourself. It’s about you. What parts of you do you not accept? What part of you are you ashamed of? This is where the gold dust is. This is where self-awareness comes into conscious life.

08/02/2022

🌿If you know me, I refer a lot to our shady-ness. This is not one and the same as throwing shade (which is a very enjoyable pastime).

What I’m referring to is Carl Jung’s seminal theory on our shadow. Our wounds, our sorrows, our nastiness, or dark side is all comprised in the shadow of our psyches.

We may deliberately keep some of these parts well-hidden from society or family and friends.

Or it is most likely out of awareness because these parts are deeply embedded in our psyches as a form of adaptation we learned in order to get by and fit in.

ℹ️ Can you find your shadow? What feelings does it comprise of?
ℹ️ What situations or relationships can provoke you into your shadowy emotional states?

04/02/2022

🗯️ It’s not about that woman or your husband or that Amazon fraud caller [fill in a person and occupation of a really annoying person!]. You’re feeling angry/tired/sad/etc.

📣 It’s very unlikely that someone is trying to sabotage you or hurt you directly in real life.

Rather, what is it about this person I’m in relationship to that gets me so ginned up? 💡 This moment of reflection offers up the possibility for insight about yourself. It puts a buffer between ourselves and our ego's defences and holds possibility for deeper self-understanding.

02/02/2022

☝🏿 All too often, we unconsciously gaslight ourselves into thinking that our feelings and moods are not important. We should just get on with it. And just push it down - agitating our nervous system even further.

💡 We’re human. We feel. And sure, our hormonal systems will influence our moods. Let’s first start with awareness. Next time, give yourself a little more credit. There may be a reason you are feeling something uncomfortable.

When we offer ourselves compassion, we may arrive to logic. 🙏🏾Then we are offered context and reason for our feelings. We can’t bypass the messy parts.

27/01/2022

Thinking of booking in some online therapy sessions with KCB Therapy? What can you expect from a session with me?

I am a professionally qualified Integrative Counsellor (Dip, MBACP) trained in a number of tools and theoretical frameworks that are tailored according to your needs. I am also a trained social scientist (MA, Sociology, Goldsmiths).

The combination of the two studies allows me to see the bigger picture of the larger systems and structures that affect our social lived realities. 👍🏿

Factors such as addiction, bereavement, chronic illness, gender issues, loneliness, poverty, racism, social status, and more do not occur in isolation nor are they strictly limited to childhood.

See how I can help you achieve clarity, depth and growth by booking in a free consultation with me - which will be a brief assessment to gather what you are seeking from counselling and how we might work together.

Sound good? Send me a DM or fill out the contact form on my website (link below)👇🏿
https://www.kcbtherapy.com/consultations

Address

Saint Leonards

Opening Hours

Monday	10am - 5pm
Tuesday	10am - 5pm
Wednesday	10am - 5pm
Thursday	10am - 5pm
Friday	10am - 5pm

Website

https://www.kcbtherapy.com/consultations

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