Jessica Chu, MDiv, RP

27/05/2022

Laughing, crying, pondering, questioning, escaping, raging, being silent - what it means to be human & what it means to journey together.

笑ったり、泣いたり、考えたり、探索したり、逃げたり、怒ったり、沈黙したりしていること。人間として生きていること。一緒に旅をしていること。相談室で残っている。

13/11/2021

新たな出発
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A new beginning

26/08/2020

13/09/2019

Loving the new language editions to Psychology Today’s profile! I am passionate about cross-cultural counselling and integration, and current research in the field is beginning to focus on diverse ethnic groups. Working through issues in your mother tongue feels very different, and often more effective, than English. Language holds more than just words - it holds emotions, values, unspoken expectations, and relational experiences of that particular moment. With the growth of mental health awareness and care, mental health research, and diversity in Toronto, there are more and more therapists who offer therapy in other languages. Reach out to a therapist who speaks your mother tongue!

19/02/2019

很多亞洲人沒有心理治療輔導的經驗，因為在東方文化和歷史中，心靈健康與關係健康是很新的概念，沒有熟悉的語言能夠表達這些東西，頂多用「解決問題」的類似詞彙來尋求解脫。但是時代在快速的改變中，在這個全球化、現代化的社會裡已經呈現許多關乎心靈與關係健康的社會問題了。我們不能夠不承認、不重視這個話題。這個話題也不能只用「解決問題」的詞彙來了解，因為有很多心靈與關係的不健康是不能夠「解決」的（例如說，被愛人用言語暴力對待的創傷是能夠「解決」的嗎？）我們需要用更豐富與多元的方式來談論這個話題。
Most Asians have no experience seeking professional help for mental, emotional, and relational issues. In Asian history and culture, mental health and counselling are new and emerging concepts. In Chinese, there is limited vocabulary to describe experiences such as depression, anxiety, trauma, emotions, identity, and relationship processes. However, in this rapidly changing era of modern globalism, we see many emerging social issues in Asian communities correlated to underlying emotional and relational unhealth. To name a few: teenage suicidality in Japan, Chinese fuerdai in China, and mental health crisis in Asian international students abroad. The global Asian community can no longer ignore the topic of emotional, mental, and relational health. We need to develop more nuanced language to describe these issues in the context of Asian culture and open the dialogue in view of lowering barriers for Asians to access help and support.

15/02/2019

情人節的傍晚：跟愛人之間的互動與溝通，是經過日常生活的酸甜苦辣培養出來的。維持親密關係必須要天天付出愛與被愛的代價。如果每一天能夠練習用言語跟愛人表達感謝、練習聆聽愛人所分享的話題，你與愛人會在這份親密關係裡享受決定去愛與被愛的果子。
Valentine’s evening: intimate relationship with a loved one is developed through the joys and pains of daily living. Maintaining intimacy requires the great cost of loving and being loved. If you practice articulating your appreciation and listening empathetically to your loved one, you will find yourselves enjoying each other and the fruits of your choice to love.

05/02/2019

「家醜不外漏」不知道傷了多少亞洲家庭。因為「家醜不外漏」，所以青少年想要尋求幫助變成一個羞愧的動作，他們只能無助的躲在房間裡一邊聽父母吵架、一邊哭泣。因為「家醜不外漏」，所以丈夫不知道怎麼面對妻子的焦慮與性拒絕，只能無奈的在晚上用螢幕與自己的手滿足自己。因為「家醜不外漏」，所以祖母只能用賭博來逃避年老被拋棄的經歷。其實不是「家醜不外漏」，而是「不敢面對與家人的破碎關係」吧。如果「不要再說了」的話，大家就不會不高興，不會有問題，對不對？如果您真的想要保住家庭的面子、維持家庭的健康關係，那就必須要面對家裡的破碎，才能有嶄新的空間。所以請您把「家醜」分享給您信任的人，包括專業家庭婚姻治療師，好讓您與家人能夠走向改變的過程。
There is a deep-rooted Chinese saying: 「Don’t air the family’s dirty laundry outside」So many Asian families have suffered under the weight of this belief. Because of this saying, teenagers who want to seek help feel ashamed and guilty, so they can only hide in their room and internalize the helplessness they feel when their parents yell at each other outside. Because of this saying, husbands who do not know how to communicate with their trauma-survivor wives about s*x can only watch po*******hy and ma******te to satisfy their desires for intimacy. Because of this saying, grandmothers who do not know how to face aging and loneliness can only spend time at the casino to escape their sense of hopelessness. More than「Don’t air the family’s dirty laundry outside」perhaps it is 「Don’t face the family brokenness」- after all, if we don’t talk about it, it will just go away and return to peace right? However, only in facing the family brokenness and acknowledging the problem can there be spaces for change. So please 「air the family’s dirty laundry」 to trustworthy people and professionals so your family can go through the process of transformation.

01/02/2019

心理治療輔導是一個有「目的性」的「專業」「談話」過程，並不是隨便聊天。治療者有想要成就的目標與改變的東西，而治療師的工作就是一起和治療者達到目標。大多數的人在剛開始治療輔導時並不清楚自己想要達到什麼目標，這是很正常的！弄清楚治療目標是治療過程的一部分，通常會在第一次到第三次的約談才會清楚呈現。今天我想跟大家分享常常見到的治療方向，好讓大家有一點頭緒，如果想要尋求幫助至少有個起跑點，不會一頭霧水。在圖二中我分類寫出常常遇到的主題，有可能還漏掉一些～這些主題裡，有比較嚴重的問題呈現，有比較輕微的問題呈現。在我接的案件中，我發現相對於西方背景的客人，東方背景的客人的問題呈現通常比較嚴重，因為東方背景的客人等到沒有辦法時才會尋求幫助。其實很多事情如果可以早一點尋求幫助的話，會比較容易改變的喔。

怎麼樣選擇目標？
回到上一個 post 的問題：「現在有哪些事情造成日常生活的阻礙？」「現在有哪些事情是你想要改變的問題？」

怎樣知道有在朝著目標進展？
通常每四、五次的約談時，會重新討論治療者的目標以及探討緩解與改善的地方。比如說，如果治療目標是改變焦慮的想法，那在探討過程中我們會看治療者的日常思維裡有沒有改變的地方。我們在訂目標時會希望訂一個可以測量的目標。

Psychotherapy is a relational and therapeutic processed established on “talking with a purpose.” Clients come into therapy with some goals they want to work on. It is very normal for clients to begin therapy without knowing their goals. Coming up with and articulating therapeutic goal is part of therapy too. These are some common issues I have encountered in my work with clients. I have briefly organized these issues into different theme clusters. Of course, much more can be expanded under each issue. For example, under “self harm”, addiction can be categorized into substance use, food, internet, s*x, shopping, etc. I have noticed that certain themes come up more frequently with different client populations. For example, Asian clients often come in with parenting and family issues. I have also noticed that in general, my Asian clients present with more serious issues compared to my non-Asian clients. My guess is that Asian clients seek therapy as their last resort, when there is no other way anymore. I encourage people to seek support and professional help earlier because issues are more readily addressed early on. Some issues require more work to address and change when they have rigidified or formed into normal patterns of interaction.

26/01/2019

我的朋友們常常問我：「什麼是心理治療啊？什麼樣的人會去找你做治療？」我的回答：「正常人。正常的上班族、正常的爸爸、正常的大學生、正常的國中生、正常的退休族、正常的夫妻、正常的單親媽媽、正常的小孩。都是正常人。」我的朋友們：「.....（懷疑的眼神和困惑的表情）..... 那.... 為什麼去找你？」我：「因為他們有勇氣面對自己。有時候是逼不得已的，但是這些正常人想要被了解、想要有地方哭泣、想要改變。」在心理治療當中，每個人有自己想要達成的目的。有一些人想要改變的東西太多了，不知道從哪裡開始。又有一些人過得很順利，沒有想要改變的東西。對於處在第一種狀況的人，我會問：現在你的日常生活中，哪一個東西影響你最大？對於處在第二種狀況的人，我會說：認識自己也可以是目標喔。運用「談話」和「互動」做「治療」不能解決一切的問題，有些問題需要看醫生吃藥、有些問題是社會政策所帶來的、有些問題是被迫要處理的（車禍、死亡、外遇、侵犯等）。但是在治療師與治療者所創造的信賴安全關係中，「談話」和「互動」讓治療者能夠走在自我認識以及改變的過程中。
A lot of my Asian friends ask me: “So what do you do in therapy? What kind of people do you see?” My response: “Normal people. Normal corporate employees, normal single mothers, normal university students, normal teenagers, normal couples, normal foster children. All normal people.” My Asian friends: “..... (quizzical look and confused expression).... then why do they come to therapy?” My response: “Because they have the courage to face themselves. Sometimes the circumstance leaves them no choice. But all of my clients crave to be understood, to have a safe place to cry, and to change.” In therapy, clients have goals they want to accomplish. Some clients have too many things going on and don’t know where to start. To these clients I ask this: what is the biggest thing impacting your daily life now? Other clients have no problems and nothing they want to change. To these clients I say this: getting to know yourself can be a goal too. Utilizing “conversation” and “relationship” as agents of change cannot solve everything. It cannot take away the problem of suffering and pain. However, talk therapy is able to provide a space of healing, coping, and discovery for those who desire the journey.

07/01/2019

新年快樂！2019的第一個話題是專門給多倫多讀書的大學生。同學，如果你是全職學生(Full Time Student)，你知道自己的學費裡面包含了各式各樣的服務嗎？學生健康保險是當中很重要的服務之一。每一所大學的學生保險擔保的項目和金額不同，但是保險裡一定包含心理輔導的額度。例如，多倫多大學的大學生健康保險裡，同學可以和心理治療師或心理師約談20次，每一次的費用如果$125以下保險全額補助。我整理了四所大學針對心理輔導的保險額度，其中要注意的是大學生與研究生的區別。這些保險額度能夠幫助你得到你需要的專業服務喔。
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Happy 2019! January marks the beginning of a new semester for university students. For students dealing with mental health issues, January can be a daunting month. Today I will briefly talk about the university Health & Dental Plan for full-time students in Toronto, which is automatically included in every full-time student’s tuition fee. The Health & Dental Plan offers different coverage for different Toronto university, but every plan includes some coverage for psychotherapy and professional counselling. For example, U of T’s plan for undergraduate students covers 20 sessions up to $125 per session for psychotherapists, psychologists, and registered social workers. U of T students, this is an amazing coverage that really helps to lower financial barriers for you to access quality mental health support! I provided a summary of psychotherapy coverage for the 4 big universities in Toronto. Note that for Ryerson, York, and OCAD, some coverage only recognizes psychologists and social workers but not psychotherapists - please call your university to confirm before you decide to book an appointment with a mental health professional.