Marital Bliss with Oma

04/09/2022

03/09/2022

Elevating your identity and overcoming trauma

1. When you get married, don’t stop caring about yourself. Create a me, myself and I plan too.

2. Don’t get into marriage and try to be everything, create a balance and do what you love too.

3. Marriage should not drown your own purpose, support your spouse while you fulfill your own vision.

4. The trauma you don’t heal from while still single will show up in a bad way in marriage.

5. Pay attention to your healing so your children do not model your trauma.

6. Be truthful about your trauma and healing journey. Be willing to invest in a therapy session when you need to.

09/02/2022

MARRIAGE IS LIKE A SHOE

MARRIAGE is like a shoe. When you wear oversize be ready to drag it along through out life, and when you wear under-size be ready to feel the pains through out life." One thing about marriage is that you don't drop your shoe or remove it at any point, no matter how painful or how stressful it is.

That is why I thought it necessary to write you this letter.

Dear Singles,
When you are ready to buy your own shoe please take note of these three things:

1. PHYSICAL APPEARANCE

Do not look for the beautiful ones, the nice ones or the cheap ones. Look for the one that is your size. Not every handsome, wealthy or intelligent guy is for you, not every beautiful woman is for you. Look for the one that is meant for you, the one that aligns with your values and beliefs, the one who you meet at your life's journey.
It is important to know where you're going in life before you think of getting a wife or a husband.

2. POSITION:

All sizes of shoes are not placed in the same place.
There is a place for court shoes, laced up shoes, sport footwear, snickers etc. We have Children sizes, young people's sizes and the adult sizes. Know where to get your own shoe. Your size cannot be everywhere my brother, your type cannot be everywhere my sister. You cannot be a Christian, and be looking for a wife material at a club. Your wife or husband can't just be everywhere.

Stick to your values and therein you shall find someone like you, but when your values are not defined anyone can just match you. Discover yourself and define your values

3. PERCEPTIONS:

In this kind of shoe purchasing enterprise, you are not permitted to try the shoe before you buy. This is why it is important to seek guidance and counseling, from people who have bought shoes before or are into the business of directing people to the right shoes (pastors, marriage counsellors and Relationship coaches).
And most importantly to avoid much time wasting , simply consult the shoe manufacturer to tell you your size (Almighty God).

NOTE :"You do not prepare for wedding, you prepare for marriage."

Ladies of today get so motivated when they attend weddings and they will quickly want to say yes to that guy. Wait!!! It is not just the wedding ooooh. The wedding is just one day. After the wedding WHAT NEXT?

Finally, it is not something you rush to the market and just pick a shoe because you like or can purchase it.
Ask questions

-Where is this shoe made from? (Background)

-What's the size (Values)

-How much (His/Her interest)

-How long will it last (His/Her Character)

-Who made it? (Is she/He of the same faith This is compatibility)

-Will it match me? (This is whether he/she loves you and will

accept you the way you are)

Dear one, remember many are dragging their foot and they
would hardly reach their destinations, many are feeling endless pains and wish they could pull off the shoes but no way!!! I have seen people with beautiful shoes and when they show you their foot, you will see scars. Beloved, it is not about the physical, it is the size, you can't know the size from afar so come close, build a relationship first but remember 'you are not permitted to try it before you buy it'.
And for those who have purchased the wrong shoes, you can still make it your size again if you'd consult the manufacturer and let Him have His way in your marriage.

May God bless us all. Feel free to share to all singles, you might be touching someone's life.

07/02/2022

PROPOSAL AND COURTSHIP

A lot of us are familiar with this words

Now what is proposal?
Proposal is an act of introducing a plan to someone or people
There is no proposal ontill it involves more than one person
A proposal is not complete ontill there is an agreement

Now what is courtship
Courtship is the period between the agreement day and your wedding day

Courtship is the period of development TOWARDS an intimate relationship wherein the both party get to know each other and DECIDE if there will b an engagement
If you read my second definition very well you would notice there were two words on capital letters.
Courtship is not marriage but a period of development towards an intimate relationship not into an intimate marriage. Don't mix it up
Wherein both parties get to know each other and decide if there would be an engagement meaning there is no engagement yet. Its a period of knowing, thinking and rethinking

OBJECTIVES OF A HEALTHY COURTSHIP

1) It is a time of consolidating your conviction.

This is a period of cementing your sureness.
Am I really sure he/she is what I want?, am I convinced about this?
This is the foundation of that relationship

2) It is a time of confirmation, discovery and reconsideration

Its a period to confirm and discover lots of things about him/her then after reconsidering if you can continue on same both

3) It is a time of understanding and understudying

Get to understand and understudy your partner. What do he like, what is her hobby , temperament, motivation etc

4) It is a time of checkmating your vision and values.

This is a very important aspect of courtship and should not be joked with.
If a career woman and you end up marrying a man who's vision is to marry an housewife you will be will frustrated or as a man your vision as always being to marry a partner who will support you and she tell you, you're to handle all d financial responsibilities

5) It is a time and period of Orientation

Introduction to families, friends and every relationship that each of you holds
Tell your partner all there is to know about your family, culture and beliefs

A wedding was canceled because the bride was asked of her grooms middle name and she did not know it. Hmmmm not orientation

6) It is a time/period of insulation from external entanglements

Give people the time to release you in their mind before they finally release you on your wedding day
Let your friends, suitors, colleague be aware of the fact you are in courtship and will be getting married to your partner.
This is always the reason why many commit adultery cos their crush or ex is not aware of their marital status

Lastly but not the least
7) It is a time/period of planning and amalgamating your spiritual looks together

Like planning how your marital home should be, what are the does n don't of your yet to be home, planning from career, children, church, family visit etc

Finally courtship is only but an agreement seeking under God to come together in the FUTURE not in courtship
You're still two separate bodies, so there should be no s*x.

Courtship should be conducted with purity.
Never go into marriage with a guilty conscience. If you engage in s*x before marriage you will never be able to trust each other after marriage.

©OMA SYLVIA OTEGWU 2019
Bliss with Oma

05/02/2022

One of the biggest questions singles ask is " HOW DO I KNOW THE RIGHT PERSON FOR ME"
Knowing and choosing rightly is the most important aspect of a relationship. If you choose wrongly you're bound to live with it all your life. Don't forget marriage is not something to gamble with, if you do, you will surely come out with lots of injury that's if you succeed in coming out alive.
TESTS TO KNOWING THE RIGHT ONE:
* TEST OF TIME: Can he/she withstand the test of time.
* TEST OF DISTANCE: would there still be love and understanding if distance occurs.
* TEST OF AFFLICTION: would he/she still be there when challenges storms at you.
* TEST OF REALITY: would there still be contentment and commitment when the real reality of life showcases in your relationship form your he/she.
This four test is very important in every relationship.
God bless you and keep your relationship as you work towards fulfilling success in your relationships.

© Oma Sylvia Otegwu
Bliss with Oma #
and singles forum #

04/02/2022

*DO NOT BUILD A RELATIONSHIP ON FALSE INFORMATION, LIES AND DECEPTION.*

A Relationship or Marriage built in the foundation of lies and half truths is a ticking time bomb, it's only a matter of time, truth always finds its way out.

A Person you can't TRUST with your TRUTH is a Person you shouldn't trust with your LIFE

A Person who can't handle your truth is a person who doesn't deserve to handle You.

You are Your Truth .

Don't lie about your past and your background.

Don't Lie about your s*xual history,

Don't lie about the true state of your Finances/business and Career.

A Person you need a lie to Impress is a Person you WANT, but don't NEED. You need a Person who you can be real with and be safe with.

Remember, that truth you are hiding can find its way out all on its own. People talk, news travels, the past comes visiting, and Laboratory tests can gossip.

If they can't handle the truth, let them go, it's better NOW than TOMORROW.

Don't be a Liar. Lying constantly isn't WEAKNESS, but WICKEDNESS.

Fake nothing. Anatomically and Physiologically

Forge nothing.

Be You.

Marriage is too long a time for you to chose to be fake.

Trust me, you won't be able to keep up with fake appearances forever. And when you no longer can, their love will turn to Hate and you'll have no one to blame

Remember honesty is still the best policy...

26/01/2022

MESSAGES FROM MY PLANTAINS: I went for a ministration somewhere about two weeks ago. One of the packages I was given was this bunch of unripe plantain. You know how we do it nau? I hid it under some clothes to hasten its ripening process.

To my surprise, after about 3 days, I noticed that, only one out of the 5 of them was ripe. Others were still as green and as hard as when I was given. I was wondering why was it only one that was ripe and others were not. They were cut the same day. They were given to me the same day. I kept all under clothes at the same day. But, only one was ripe while others were not.

I know that one that got ripen before others might want to be seeing its self as the wisest, smartest and fastest of them all. That's how many of us behave. Just because things are going very fine & fast for you, you are quick to judge people as lazy or slow.

Just because you married early, just because you graduated on point, just because you have children without any delay, just because you are well placed in your office, just because your ministry is growing fast, just because your children are doing well in their studies, just because your business is growing faster than your friends' own, just because and just because, you are thinking others are ' too slow to ripe' Such thinking is pride! Such thinking is false.

The Bible says " I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all" Ecclesiastes 9:11.

In whatever aspect of our lives where it seems we got 'ripe" (successful, blessed, lifted, fruitful, wealthy, e.t.c) before others, lets know it is simply by God's grace.

Finally, Other plantains later got ripe after few days. Friends, don't envy those your friends and colleagues who are already 'ripe' before you. Don't let envy push you to hate them or plot evil for them. Wait inside 'those clothes" where God is 'hiding' (preparing) you. It will not be long, in 'few days" to this time, you will soon get ripe! It will soon be your turn. Just 'few days' more!!!

Oma Sylvia Otegwu

21/01/2022

SINGLES PLEASE TAKE NOTE:
Kings don't sag their trousers and queens don't walk around the street in bum shorts.
Your appearance determines who you attract.