Ascending Intentionally

11/09/2026

Grief brain: I don't want to bother anybody.
Also grief brain: Why does nobody know I need somebody?

Remi would like to formally remind everyone that needing people is not, in fact, bothering people. 💀
ALSO-Reach out to your friends. Even if you bother them.

11/09/2026

Things you DON'T have to be to come to a Death Café:

Dying. 😵
Grieving. 😭
A healthcare worker.👨‍⚕️👩‍⚕️
“Comfortable with death.” 👌
Spiritual.🪷
Morbid. 😂

You can simply be curious.🤷🏾‍♂️

That's enough.

We drink something, eat something, and talk about death. And somehow, we almost always end up talking about life.

2 dates coming up this month!!

11/09/2026

PET FRIDAY!!!! Let's make this one super easy this week.

Drop the most recent picture in your camera roll of the creature currently running your household.

No cheating and looking for the cute one.

MOST. RECENT. PHOTO. 😂👇

(ALSO-Shout out to Robin Hayes at Dog Bath & Beyond for making Troy and Bella look AMAZING!)

11/09/2026

You're allowed to keep ONE age forever.

Not go back to that age—you keep everything you know now.

But physically, you're that age forever.

What age are you picking?

This has absolutely nothing to do with death. 😂 I just want to know.
I'd have to say the age I am now. I think I'm the strongest and healthiest I've ever been. So I'm staying at 46.

10/09/2026

🛌🏿What I do isn't always sitting at someone's bedside. 🛌

🤔Sometimes it's helping someone think through what they want before they're dying. 💭

🤗Sometimes it's helping a daughter understand what she's seeing.👀

🗣Sometimes it's talking about regrets, relationships, unfinished business or legacy👂

👩‍🏫Sometimes it's teaching a room full of people who aren't dying at all.👨🏿‍🏫

👂And sometimes it's simply being the person willing to have the conversation everyone else is avoiding.🤫

Death doula work isn't one thing.

Because dying—and living—aren't one thing either.

10/09/2026

Did you know… you don't have to know what you want before talking to a death doula? So many people don't.

“I don't know” is actually a perfectly good place to start. 🤷

I don't know where I want to die.🤷🏾‍♀️🛌🏥
I don't know what I want my family to do. 🤷🏽
I don't know what I'm afraid of. 🤷🏿‍♂️😱😨
I don't know what matters to me at the end. 🤷🏻‍♀️⏳⌛

Okay. Let's start there. My job isn't to hand you the “right” answers.

It's to help you find YOUR answers.

10/09/2026

09/09/2026

A question I think we should ask each other more often:

What makes you feel most alive?

Not successful.
Not productive.
Not useful.

Alive.

What's yours?

09/09/2026

👀 ❓☠Things you probably didn't know you could ask a death doula about:

“What happens if Dad dies in the middle of the night?”🌚⭐
“Can the grandchildren be there?” 👵👧
“How do I know when death is getting closer?” ⌛
“What can we do at the bedside?” 🛌🏼
“How do I start a legacy project?” 🗣🎤👂
“Is it normal that Mom isn't eating?” 🚫 🍽
“How do I tell someone I'm scared?” 😱😥😳
“What do we do immediately after they die?” 🫧😢☎

You don't need to already know the right questions.
Helping you figure out what to ask is part of the work.

09/09/2026

Did you know… death doulas support the living, too?

Sometimes my work is sitting with the person who is dying. 🛏

Sometimes it's sitting at the kitchen table with the daughter who says:
“I have no idea what I'm supposed to be doing.” 🤝🤗

Sometimes the person who needs the most support isn't the one in the bed.
Dying happens to one person.
But it affects an entire circle of people around them. 👨‍👩‍👧👨‍👨‍👧‍👧👩‍👩‍👦‍👦

Death doula care can hold space for that circle, too.