Kellytakesmedicine

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Kellytakesmedicine I’m Dr. Cheung, an internal medicine physician who specializes in older adults and serious illness, aka geriatrics and palliative care! Views mine.
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Follow along for underrated knowledge and deep talks.

22/08/2026

Medical students and residents ask me this A LOT. Sadly, it is well known that empathy starts to decline in medical training. While I don’t have all the answers and I’m still a work in progress, I can share my experience so far & what I’ve learned from my role models:

1 - Intentionality and prioritizing. If it’s not a priority unfortunately empathy will be easily taken away. I told all my attendings and my husband this was my number one fear and goal and they actually helped me stay grounded.

2 - Therapy therapy therapy!!! Everyone in medicine should have one considering the things we see. It taught me how to internalize the good and process the bad. Also, our natural response to moral injury and distress is numbing. Unfortunately that works for temporarily then poisons us over time.

3 - If therapy isn’t an option, find some way to master emotional regulation! Huge fan of Brene Brown and her concepts of vulnerability.

All that to say: NOT EASY. Worth it.

In residency, I was taught to get the DNR. Walk in, explain the odds, explain them again if they didn’t “get it” and to ...
21/08/2026

In residency, I was taught to get the DNR. Walk in, explain the odds, explain them again if they didn’t “get it” and to keep pushing goals of care hoping they’d come around.

From geriatrics and palliative care, I’ve learned it’s rarely that simple. We cannot have a logical conversation until we acknowledge the emotion underneath it. We know this. We know that when emotions hijack the brain, logic doesn’t stand a chance.

I’m not saying this makes it okay to do things to patients that aren’t indicated or appropriate.

I’m saying the conversation goes nowhere until we make space for the emotion first.

16/08/2026

I was 20 years old when I searched Google for “doctors that specialize in older people”.

For 12 years, ageist opinions echoed and fed into my shame. I’d say “geriatrics” and brace myself. What will it be this time? Disappointment or contempt? It fed into insecurity, too. I said yes to research, to leadership, to anything that might prove I’d chosen right.

I never felt that way with my patients.

Not once, in a room with them, did I doubt this.

It was always outside the room. The faces. The people who’ve never sat across from my patients, never heard them say what they said to me last week. That they haven’t felt heard in a long time. Even friends - while never intentional, the impact still hurt.

I’m done bracing.

I’m not done fighting for them. Thank you all for giving me this platform. 🫶

14/08/2026

Despite our best intentions to empathize, saying this then makes it about you and can shut down your patient!!

Suggestions - not a script, please fit to you/your patient!
✨ I can only imagine what that must’ve been like
✨ I don’t know if I would’ve handled it as well as you did
✨ I’m not sure what I would’ve done in that situation
✨ I am sorry that happened. Thank you trusting me enough to share that

(Thank you to all my mentors and role models for teaching me these soft skills in medicine!!)

🩵 Follow along if patient centered communication is your thing.

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