07/28/2026
WTF !!
It's not what you think it is.
Well, maybe so.
FREE VIRTUAL GATHERING THIS FRIDAY 5 PM EST. EMAIL ME AT [email protected] FOR ZOOM LINK.
WE WILL GATHER JUST TO HOLD SPACE FOR EACH OTHER AND TALK ABOUT OUR SHARED CHALLENGES.
I had a conversation the other day with one of my sisters. We were speaking about the use of swear words or cussing when it comes to a practitioner of any kind or from a teacher when in class. I had to sit back and ponder as my views are completely antithetical to that. The conversation began because I am pondering offering a virtual class entitled "WTF!!", as I am frequently hearing those words from many clients over this past year with all the challenges we are all encountering. Having been raised in NYC, cuss words come naturally to me. They are actually one of the few vices I have. I've gone years without having uttered a single potty mouth expletive, then many times, like now where I will cuss more times than I could imagine, I have had people that have never ever heard me use one swear word, and others who know it to be part of my vernacular. A long time friend said to me the other night, "When you say it it actually makes people feel lighter, it makes me feel lighter, it something about the energy behind it."
I remember in a few of the classes I took in counseling and development we spoke about the energies behind cuss words and not necessarily the meaning themselves. I watch in client sessions as in the midst of clients telling me their stories swear words will fly across the phone and a client will feel compelled to stop and apologize, sometimes profusely, for using those kinds of words. It takes them out of presence, out of the flow of what is unwinding, and right into shame or issues of propriety. It's their session, I tell them. I am familiar with the words. Half the time I don't even "hear" them because when holding space and presence for their story, the f bomb or any other swear word is simply energy.
When I teach classes, I say a prayer in the beginning and let people know that sometimes a cuss word might come out of my mouth. Especially when I am in the midst of group process work and the group as a whole is processing rage and sometimes it is that one little swear word that will bring a light into the room, expand their breathing, and give them permission to express the rage as opposed to internalizing it. Cuss words are intensifiers of emotion when used energetically. In the various forms of psychological counseling I have studied, the ways in which we can present with our clients varies. For the most part, in creating a relationship with a client where we are seen and felt as relatable is so vital for me in my practice. I've been privileged to work with the holiest of people to let's say, not the holiest. They all have crossed paths with a cuss word. Does it mean my mouth could be washed out with soap during every client session? No, not at all. When appropriate, an intensifier might come across my lips, and it does what it needs to, whether in a personal session or in a class.
I decided to do a little research on the history and science behind swearing. One article I read mentioned that a study showed that swearing can improve stress levels and pain tolerance. It can sometimes do for us what laughing does. I'm still reading pieces on the history and use of swear words in different cultures and centuries.
Language is fascinating. It can bind us together or separate us. The energy and hidden meaning behind why we use certain words is what interests me, especially when it comes to the healing arts.
Laura Aversano
