05/11/2026
WOW - 10 YEARS IN RECOVERY.
The first photo was taken days before my arrest, which would lead to a life-changing experience. The 2nd photo is in April 2026, while attending the OC Police Academy Training Graduation, proudly wearing a shirt that reads "Sober because my mug shot was not cute," and the 3rd photo is everything I now have because of recovery...The family I created.
The morning on May 11, 2016, started out like a typical morning in active addiction. Waking up dope sick, planning a scheme of what I can pull off with little effort to get the day started, and to make it through the day as a person addicted to substances. Little did I know this morning that I would receive an intervention from a higher power before my 1st use of the day.
Here I am 10 years later, every so thankful for my higher power stepping in, sitting me down in a jail cell, forcing me to get sober, and planning for my recovery before I even thought that I was ready, while enlisting the assistance of my probation officer and a DOC-funded treatment program. Now that I was sober, not in recovery, as there is a very clear difference in the two, I still thought that I was in control of my life. I really thought on May 11, 2016, that I would be released in a couple of days and back on the street to continue the destruction of my life through the use of substances. In a place where I had no decision-making control, I was able to get sober, yet still thought that I was in control of my life when I was released. I did not surrender; that was never a thought at the time. I did not plan on going to the front door of treatment when I was dropped off by the DOC van that day in July 2026. A power greater than myself took over and assisted me one foot in front of the other all the way to the front door inside the house, where I would learn the skills to change my life. Had it not been for a higher power watching over me during this time, I am certain that I would have been forever 39.
Today, at the age of 49, I celebrate 10 years in recovery. An equal amount of Recovery years as I spent actively using substances. I can honestly say that I walked through hell and came out on the other side. I have seen and experienced things that would make true crime reality television look like a children's bedtime story. At the end of the day, I would NOT change a single experience I had as I am a part of the 2% that make it out of addiction, and rather than being ashamed, I wear my recovery as a badge of honor.
And let's not forget those who want to add doubt to my recovery time by spreading rumors of use because you can't handle the truth....carry on, talk on, do whatever toxic things that you do. People in recovery change; they create a world for themselves where it is easier not to use substances, and have no obligation to defend themselves from untrue rumors and gossip. You are simply eliminated from existence in my world. I do not entertain liars, manipulators, and gaslighters who wish daily for the demise of others and believe that if you speak it into existence, it will happen.
I will leave you with this: I NEVER wanted your money, not even in my active use. What I did want was your support, to be treated as an equal sibling, no favoritism, to feel as important as your other child, and you failed me before, during, and after my addiction. It was never supposed to be what I can do for you, but rather what you signed up to provide when choosing to bring a child into the world, but never did....unconditional love and support.
Happy 10 Clean & Sober years to me!!
