07/27/2026
why self care doesn't feel good at first, especially when you're high functioning and burnt out
when you've been high functioning for a long time, living a stressful life, prioritizing everybody else over yourself, that comes from a place that's deeply hardwired in your subconscious. so when you start to rest, when you start to take care of yourself, even though you know taking care of yourself matters, it may make you feel more stressed and icky at first.
that's your ego fighting you. your body resists it. it'll bring up guilt and shame. worry. it'll make you feel like you're doing something wrong. you likely learned a long time ago that everything else came before your needs. your subconscious and your body see doing anything for yourself, first or at all, as a threat.
that self care guilt, shame, anxiety (or whatever else you feel) is part of the process. it's totally normal.
with practice and repetition, taking care of yourself over and over and over, knowing and being with the struggle of it, it gets easier. that's nervous system regulation. new neural pathways forming. taking care of yourself starts to feel like second nature. the guilt may loosen. your stress decreases. it starts to feel like you've returned home.