Tyler Dawneé Young, LCSW Therapy

Tyler Dawneé Young, LCSW Therapy Helping women untangle burnout, anxiety, and trauma. Psychotherapy in CA & UT 🌿

Accepting new clients

Genuine question.When's the last time you did something purely because it was fun?Not because it was good for you. Not b...
09/05/2026

Genuine question.

When's the last time you did something purely because it was fun?

Not because it was good for you. Not because it counted as self-care. Not because it was productive or efficient or something you could put on a list and cross off.

Just fun. The kind where you lost track of time and weren't thinking about anything else.

If you had to think for a while to answer that, you're not alone. A lot of high-achieving women I work with realize at some point that fun quietly disappeared. Not all at once. Gradually, as responsibilities stacked up and the idea of doing something with no payoff started to feel indulgent.

My theory is this: the ability to do something just for the joy of it is actually a nervous system indicator. When play feels impossible or frivolous, it's often because the system has been in output mode for so long it's forgotten what neutral feels like.

Fun isn't a reward for finishing everything. It's part of how humans actually function.

Drop it in the comments. What's the last thing you did just because it was fun? I'm nosy and collecting evidence for this theory.

🔔 Follow me for more.

I ask clients this sometimes in session.What would it feel like to do this at 70% instead of 110%?Watch how fast the sho...
09/04/2026

I ask clients this sometimes in session.

What would it feel like to do this at 70% instead of 110%?

Watch how fast the shoulders drop just hearing the question. There's almost always a visible exhale. Like something in them goes oh. Like part of them has been waiting for someone to say that was an option.

And then, almost immediately, the anxiety comes in. But what if it's not good enough. But what if people notice. But what if 70% means I'm falling behind.

That's the belief worth examining. The one that says anything less than maximum effort is the same as failure. That rest is something you earn after exhaustion, not something you're allowed before it.

70% done with your nervous system intact is almost always better than 110% done on a system that's been running on fumes for months. The quality of your presence, your thinking, your relationships, all of it changes when you're not perpetually maxed out.

You don't have to earn rest with exhaustion first. That's not a rule. That's just a story that stuck.

If you're ready to actually examine where that story came from and what it would take to change it, I'd love to work with you.

Link in bio to book a session with me.

🔔 Follow me for more.

You've been the strong one for a long time.The one who figures it out. The one who keeps things running. The one who hol...
09/03/2026

You've been the strong one for a long time.

The one who figures it out. The one who keeps things running. The one who holds it together when everyone else doesn't have to.

And you're tired. Not the kind of tired that goes away after a good night's sleep. The kind that lives in your bones. The kind that's been building quietly for years while you kept showing up anyway.

That's not weakness. That's what happens when someone has been carrying more than their share since long before they were old enough to realize that's what they were doing.

You don't have to earn rest. You don't have to finish everything first. You don't have to wait until you've done enough to justify stopping.

Rest today, if you can get away with it. Not as a reward. Just because you're allowed.

And if you've been holding it together for so long that you don't even know what it would feel like to put it down, that's something I can help with.

Link in bio to book a session with me.

🔔 Follow me for more.

Manage your stress. Set boundaries. Practice mindfulness. Journal. Take breaks.Good advice. All of it. And if you've tri...
08/28/2026

Manage your stress. Set boundaries. Practice mindfulness. Journal. Take breaks.

Good advice. All of it. And if you've tried it and still find yourself back in the same place six months later, it's not because you did it wrong.

It's because coping skills manage the surface. They don't touch what's underneath.

Most burnout in high-achieving women isn't just about workload. It's about the belief system running underneath the workload. The part that says your worth is tied to your output. That rest has to be earned. That saying no makes you a burden. That if you slow down something important will fall apart, including how people see you.

Those beliefs don't respond to a mindfulness app. They respond to actual work at the level where they live.

Real recovery means understanding where those patterns came from, why they made sense when they formed, and what it actually takes to update them. Not just manage around them.

That's the difference between coping and actually changing.

When the deeper pattern shifts, you don't just feel less burned out. You stop recreating the conditions that caused it.

That's what I work toward with every client.

Swipe to see what changes when treatment goes past coping and into the root.

Link in bio to book a session with me.

🔔 Follow me for more.

You walk into a room and within seconds you've already clocked the energy. Someone's tone is slightly off and you felt i...
08/26/2026

You walk into a room and within seconds you've already clocked the energy. Someone's tone is slightly off and you felt it before they finished the sentence. A mood shifted and you adjusted yourself to accommodate it before you even consciously registered what happened.

You've probably called this being perceptive. Emotionally intelligent. Responsible.

Sometimes it is. And sometimes it's hypervigilance wearing a socially acceptable outfit.

Hypervigilance is what happens when your nervous system learned early that reading the room wasn't optional. That staying attuned to other people's emotional states was how you stayed safe, avoided conflict, or kept things from escalating. So it got very, very good at it.

The problem is it never got the memo that things are different now. So it keeps scanning. All the time. In rooms that are actually safe. With people who aren't a threat. At a cost to you that accumulates quietly in the background.

The alertness that never fully turns off is exhausting in a way that's hard to explain to people who don't experience it. Because from the outside you just seem aware and attuned. From the inside you're working constantly.

This is something that can actually shift with the right support. Your nervous system learned to do this. It can learn something different.

Swipe to understand what hypervigilance actually is and where it comes from.

Link in bio to book a session with me.

🔔 Follow me for more.

You held it together all day. Every meeting, every demand, every small frustration, you managed it. Then you got home an...
08/25/2026

You held it together all day. Every meeting, every demand, every small frustration, you managed it. Then you got home and snapped at someone you love over something that didn't matter.

And then felt terrible about it.

This isn't a character flaw. It's what chronic stress does to your nervous system and specifically to the part of your brain that handles patience, nuance, and emotional regulation.

When your nervous system has been activated for too long, the prefrontal cortex, the part responsible for rational thinking and impulse control, starts going partially offline. The amygdala takes over. And the amygdala doesn't do nuance. It reads things in binary. Safe or threat. Fine or not fine. And something completely benign gets flagged as a problem that needs a reaction.

The people who get the worst of it are usually the ones you feel safest with. Because with everyone else the mask stays on. At home, with the people you trust, it finally comes down. And all of what you've been holding spills out sideways.

It's not that you love them less. It's that they're where you finally stop performing.

The answer isn't trying harder to control your reactions. It's addressing what's keeping your system so activated in the first place.

That's work I can help with.

Link in bio to book a session with me.

🔔 Follow me for more.

People ask me this a lot. And I get why. EMDR sounds clinical and unfamiliar and a little mysterious from the outside.So...
08/24/2026

People ask me this a lot. And I get why. EMDR sounds clinical and unfamiliar and a little mysterious from the outside.

So let me just tell you what it actually feels like.

You're not lying on a couch recounting every detail of a painful memory while I take notes. It's more active than that, and also more internal than you'd expect.

We start by identifying what we're working on. A memory, a belief, a feeling that keeps showing up. Then we bring it into awareness, just enough to notice it, not to drown in it. And then the bilateral stimulation starts. Eye movements, tapping, sound. Something that works both sides of the brain alternately while you hold the target in mind.

What happens next is different for everyone. Some people notice the memory shifting, becoming less vivid, less charged. Some notice physical sensations changing. Some find that new thoughts or images come up that they weren't expecting, things the brain was connecting underneath the surface.

Most people describe it as feeling like something is moving that has been stuck for a long time. Not always comfortable. But not the overwhelming reliving experience most people fear.

Between sets I just ask what you're noticing. You don't have to explain or analyze. Just notice and report. The processing happens largely on its own.

By the end of a session most people feel tired in a different way than when they came in. Like something shifted, even if they can't fully articulate what yet.

If you've been curious, I'd love to walk you through it in person.

Link in bio to book a session with me.

🔔 Follow me for more.

You booked the trip. You needed it. You came back and felt almost exactly the same within 48 hours.That's not because th...
08/22/2026

You booked the trip. You needed it. You came back and felt almost exactly the same within 48 hours.

That's not because the vacation wasn't good enough. It's because burnout is physiological, not situational.

A vacation changes your location. It removes some of the inputs. But a nervous system that's been running in fight-or-flight for months doesn't downregulate just because you're on a beach. It brought itself with you. The activation, the hypervigilance, the inability to fully switch off, all of it travels.

A vacation gives you a break from the inputs. It doesn't change how your nervous system is processing them.

That's why you can spend a week somewhere beautiful and still feel that familiar tension creeping back in by day three. Or come home rested for exactly two days before the heaviness returns.

What actually helps burnout is working at the level where it lives. Teaching your nervous system that it's safe to come down. Processing what's been accumulated. Addressing the patterns and beliefs that kept you in overdrive in the first place.

That's slower than a vacation. Less photogenic. And it's the thing that actually sticks.

If you're tired of the cycle of pushing, crashing, recovering just enough to push again, I work with women who are ready to actually get out of it.

Link in bio to book a session with me.

🔔 Follow me for more.

You check one more time. You ask someone if you're okay. They say yes. You feel better for about 20 minutes. Then the do...
08/22/2026

You check one more time. You ask someone if you're okay. They say yes. You feel better for about 20 minutes. Then the doubt comes back, a little louder than before.

That's the reassurance loop. And it's one of the sneakiest ways anxiety keeps itself alive.

Here's what's actually happening. When you seek reassurance, you get temporary relief. Your nervous system registers that relief and learns: checking worked, asking worked, that's how we handle this feeling. So the next time anxiety shows up, it sends you right back to the same strategy.

The problem is reassurance never addresses the underlying fear. It just quiets it long enough to reset. And each time you go back to it, the anxiety gets slightly more dependent on that external confirmation to feel okay.

It feels like coping. It's actually feeding the cycle.

Breaking the loop doesn't mean white-knuckling it through doubt. It means learning to tolerate uncertainty at the nervous system level, building internal evidence that you can handle not knowing, instead of outsourcing that to other people or repeated checking.

That's real anxiety work. And it's very doable with the right support.

Swipe to understand how the loop works and what actually helps interrupt it.

Link in bio to book a session with me.

🔔 Follow me for more.

Nobody wants to hear this, but burnout recovery isn't a retreat or a breakthrough moment or a single decision that chang...
08/19/2026

Nobody wants to hear this, but burnout recovery isn't a retreat or a breakthrough moment or a single decision that changes everything.

It's going to bed at the same time for six weeks straight. Eating actual meals instead of running on caffeine and willpower. Saying no to one optional thing a week and sitting with the discomfort of that. Tolerating silence instead of immediately filling it with productivity.

Boring. Repetitive. Unglamorous.

And exactly why it works.

Your nervous system doesn't recover through grand gestures. It recovers through the slow accumulation of low-threat moments it gradually learns to trust. Every consistent bedtime is evidence. Every meal is evidence. Every time you rest without immediately justifying it, your system gets a small signal that things are different now.

That's how the baseline actually shifts. Not dramatically. Quietly, over time, through choices that don't feel like enough but add up to everything.

The hard part for high achievers is that recovery looks like underperforming for a while. And that feeling is real and it's uncomfortable and it's also part of the process.

If you're in it right now and it feels too slow, you're probably doing it right.

I work with women navigating exactly this. Link in bio to book a session with me.

🔔 Follow me for more.

Address

77530 Enfield Lane
Palm Desert, CA
92211

Opening Hours

Monday 9am - 5pm
Tuesday 8am - 4:30pm
Wednesday 9am - 4pm
Thursday 12pm - 4pm

Website

,

Alerts

Be the first to know and let us send you an email when Tyler Dawneé Young, LCSW Therapy posts news and promotions. Your email address will not be used for any other purpose, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

Shortcuts

Share

Category