06/13/2026
Two recent news stories in Hong Kong have left me feeling deeply saddened.
The first is the tragedy involving a mother and her daughter, which reportedly followed an argument related to the daughter’s studies. The second is the recent case involving an intern doctor and alleged professional misconduct.
These two situations are very different, and I do not want to oversimplify either one. I am not trying to identify one single cause, explain exactly what professionals could have done differently, comment on crisis intervention protocols, or debate disciplinary actions.
Instead, as a clinical and educational psychologist, I find myself reflecting on a deeper question:
What is the true purpose of education?
Hong Kong is a high-achieving city. Many parents work very hard for their children, and many children also try very hard to meet expectations. Academic success is highly valued and is often seen as the pathway to stability, opportunity, and a better future.
Yet education is not only about grades, exam results, school rankings, or university admissions.
Education is also about a person's overall development: emotional growth, self-worth, empathy, relationships, resilience, creativity, values, character, ethical judgment, and the ability to live a meaningful life.
There is also a painful irony in many education systems: we are often very skilled at measuring what is visible and easy to quantify — grades, test scores, school rankings, attendance, admissions outcomes, and achievement data. We may even evaluate schools and communities through academic performance and socioeconomic indicators.
Yet we are far less consistent in asking the deeper developmental questions:
Does this child feel emotionally safe?
Can this child cope with stress, disappointment, and failure?
Is this child developing empathy, self-regulation, responsibility, and moral judgment?
Does this child still feel loved and valued when they struggle?
We often measure what is easiest to quantify, but not always what is most important for a child’s long-term well-being.
When a tragedy reportedly begins with conflict around education, we should not rush to blame. Su***de is complex, and no single argument or factor can fully explain such a painful outcome. But we can still pause and ask whether the pressure surrounding education has become too heavy for many families and children to carry.
This is also why the recent news involving an intern doctor made me reflect from a different angle. A person may have excellent academic ability and enter a highly respected profession, but have we also educated that person’s social-emotional development, professional boundaries, moral judgment, empathy, accountability, and behavioral functioning?
Academic excellence is important, especially in fields such as medicine, law, education, and psychology. But knowledge without character can become dangerous. Skill without empathy can harm others. Achievement without emotional regulation, ethical reasoning, and moral responsibility is incomplete.
Maybe these two very different stories point us toward the same deeper concern:
Are we educating children and young people only to achieve, or are we educating them to become whole human beings?
When academic performance becomes the main measure of a child’s value, both parents and children can become trapped. Parents may feel fear: “What if my child falls behind?” Children may feel shame: “Am I only valued when I perform well?”
This is where we need more compassion, not blame.
We need to support parents in managing their own anxiety around education. We need to help children know that their worth is not defined by grades. We need schools, families, and professionals to work together so that children are seen as whole people, not just students.
Academic success matters, but a child’s mental health, emotional safety, family connection, sense of belonging, moral development, and sense of hope matter too.
Maybe we need to ask not only:
“How can our children achieve more?”
But also:
“How can our children grow, feel safe, stay connected, act with integrity, and develop as whole human beings?”
If this topic brings up emotional distress for you or someone you care about, please reach out to trusted support, local crisis services, or emergency help. You do not have to go through it alone.
Integrating clinical and educational psychology to help youth thrive emotionally, academically, and in everyday life.
Ryan Yam, Psy.D.
Child & Adolescent Psychologist
Licensed Psychologist (NM) | Licensed Educational Psychologist (CA)
