02/09/2026
Reconnecting with Spirit
Grief is proof of how deeply we have loved. When someone close to us dies, the separation can feel almost violent a crushing thing, this business of carrying on when we miss somebody so completely. And yet human beings have never simply accepted that death is the end of the story. Since the very beginning of time, we have found ways to keep our loved ones close. We hold to the wind. We leave gifts out in nature. We sit in prayer. We light candles. We call out loud into an empty room, half hoping, half knowing, that we are heard. We cook their favourite meal. We listen to the piece of music that brings them straight back to us. We hold a lock of hair, we smell an old jumper, we keep fragments of a life well lived, small precious anchors to who we have loved.
And then, as time passes, it’s often the smallest memories that rise to the surface and mean the most. How they laughed. How they cried. The particular way they walked into a room. How they danced, badly or beautifully. How they responded when they were angry, or when something was simply, gloriously fun. These memories are a blessing. They are ours to keep forever.
But what happens to all of that life? Science is edging closer, year on year, to an understanding that we are, at our core, energy and energy cannot become non-energy. It doesn’t disappear. So what happens to that same energy in the spiritual field?
I have had the privilege of seeing it, again and again, through mediumship. Loved ones come through describing themselves, offering guidance, walking beside the people they left behind with light and love. For so many people, that presence, even just a glimpse of it brings enormous comfort and confidence. Yes, they will see their loved one again one day. But here is a question I find myself asking more and more: is it possible to have a bigger relationship with them before that day comes?
Is there a bridge between the worlds?
I believe there is. I believe we can invoke that bridge in the dream state setting an intention, before sleep, to meet our loved one in that space between waking and dreaming, where we might walk with them again, talk with them, laugh with them, even dance with them once more. I believe we can invite them close enough that we feel, for a moment, as though we are embracing them.
There are wonderful courses and seminars now springing up around the world exploring the continuation of consciousness, and training sensitive people to become clearer channels for this truth. But not everyone wants or needs to become a professional medium. Most people simply want to find their own way back to Mum, or Dad, or the friend they miss so much it aches. So let’s talk about that. Let’s talk about how ordinary people, in ordinary daily life, might feel the loving embrace of those they’ve lost.
Here are ten ways in.
1. Speak their name and set the intention.
Say their name. Out loud, or quietly in your own mind. Ask them, simply and sincerely, to come close. Intention is the doorway and it costs nothing to open it.
2. Hold a photograph to your heart.
Choose a photo that means something and hold it close to your chest. Some people even sleep with it nearby. A photograph carries more than an image it carries an invitation. This works even with old photographs of people you never met yourself, but who you’ve come to love through family stories.
3. Meditate and walk with them in your mind.
Close your eyes. Picture a beautiful path through nature, and picture them walking it beside you. Come walk with me, my friend. Come hold my hand, so that I might know you are here. Let the visualisation be as real and as gentle as you can make it.
4. Hold what they held.
Clothing, jewellery, a well-worn tool, anything that carried their energy in life. This is a form of psychometry the idea that objects hold a trace of the people who loved them. Sit with the object. Let yourself feel whatever comes.
5. Light a candle in a darkened room.
A small flame is a wonderfully simple invitation. It says: you have permission to come close. Walk here among us. Let us feel you.
6. Create something in their name.
Draw them. Paint them. Write their name in the sand or arrange stones on a beach in their memory. The physical act of creating, using your hands, your body opens a door that words alone can’t always reach.
7. Give them permission to walk with you.
Not just in quiet moments of remembrance, but in daily life. Ask them to help guide your decisions, to nudge you gently toward the right choice, to be a quiet source of inspiration when you need one.
8. Cook the food they loved.
There is something deeply grounding about recreating a meal someone used to make, or used to love. Taste and smell are two of the most powerful triggers we have for memory and for connection.
9. Listen to their music.
A song that was theirs, or one that simply reminds you of them, can carry you back to a moment of pure love in seconds. Let yourself sit in that feeling rather than rushing past it.
10. Hold the knowingness of everlasting life.
Above everything else, let the simple belief that life continues be a source of positivity rather than sorrow. This knowingness that love and consciousness don’t end can become one of the most powerful, hopeful forces in your life.
None of this requires special gifts or years of training. It requires only love, intention, and a little patience. Grief doesn’t ask us to let go of our loved ones. It asks us to find new ways of holding them.
And when you do even in the quietest, smallest moment trust it. That flicker of their presence is real.
Even though I cannot see you,
I know you are with me still.
Even though you dwell elsewhere,
I believe — I feel — I will.
Look through my eyes,
Speak through my words,
Inspire me on my way,
Until we meet again, my love,
Until that blessed day.
By. Tony Stockwell
