16/05/2023
A dear friend posted a quote to their profile that would normally draw a 'like' or 'heart' from me, as such posts from those we love tends to do.
But this one exploded in my head when I read it...
Why this unquestioned need to constantly seek or always want to head towards some 'bright side'...?
It clearly bespeaks an implied terror in contemplating darkness.
It suggests a kind of resilience, sure, but one born in a mistaken belief in our inherent fragility... a fragility reinforced by trying to divorce ourselves from our less 'savory' parts... the un-beautiful, inconsistent, incoherent and seemingly 'broken' bits of ourselves we don't want to look at, or that work against the way our ego prefers to view ourselves and wants the world to see us.
We can maintain this only by expending enormous emotional energy...reframing or selectively viewing elements to find 'bright sides' (ie., outright gaslight ourselves), or otherwise pushing it out of sight, out of mind ... and into the dark.
Yet true courage bids us all to go deeper ...to explore our capacity for not just resilience but anti-fragility. This necessitates becoming comfortable looking at - yes, even befriending the shadow... watching how it moves and thinks... and asking what it needs...
And thereby coaxing it gently back towards the light, not leaving it in the dark.
This is not the freakish 'ugly twin' as our imagination warns us, but rather the dissociated, orphaned elements of our whole self, crying for acceptance and re-integration... and a closer look at what's going on in the world.
And this can only happen in light. 😘