11/02/2026
"That stick is too bigโฆ"
These two di*****ds have a talent for dragging me back into the present with their ridiculous antics.
And honestly, I need it right now.
What goes up must come down. After a couple of months in a manic state last year, the bill eventually arrived. The higher and longer the high, the heavier the crash. Some of you may have noticed I went a bit MIA ๐
Mania can feel amazing.
I forget to eat, barely sleep, reorganise my entire life, move towns, plan seventeen side hustles and briefly become convinced Iโve finally cracked the code.
Every. Single. Time.
โOMG my life has improved!โ
โฆfollowed by:
โNope. Itโs just another manic episode โ the musical.โ
Then comes the crash.
Ohhh, the crash.
Projects stall.
I disappear socially.
I drop the things that make my soul sing โ community, spirituality, tarot, astro-nerdery, drawing, cooking, play.
I go from never sleeping to not wanting to get out of bed.
I look at my new house, new town, new job and think: what the hell did manic-me do?
And to be fairโฆ she does tend to upend everything.
So I panic.
Then I avoid.
Then I hide from anything constructive for a while.
But eventually, slowly, I rise again. Not back into mania โ into something steadier.
I ease up on beating myself up.
I start reaching back toward friends and family.
I notice my surroundings.
I go for a walk.
I llaugh at Ollie attempting dignity with a stick three times his size.
I drink more water.
I try a class, meet new people, explore gently โ like Iโve just arrived back in my body.
Right now Iโm in the in-between.
Not quite smelling the roses yet, but looking at them with curiosity.
Not pushing.
Not rushing.
Just being.
And to the beautiful humans who check in, send love, invite me places, or quietly wait for me to resurface โ thank you. Your patience and kindness matter more than I can usually find words for when Iโm down in it.
Iโll be slowly finding my way back to sharing again. Little things at first. Mini readings, thoughts, probably the occasional ramble about my ongoing love/hate relationship with Uranus.
Go gently with me while I come back online ๐
All my love,
stellathewanderingwitch
๐๐๐