BelFin

25/05/2026

There is something so very deeply satisfying about being able to be our whole self for our self and our sub personalities to be integrated for our idea of who we are our identity to be congruent. There is a New Age trope about authenticity and yet authenticity is such a peaceful inner state. ❤️‍🩹

Note: Carl Rogers was one of the most peaceful pioneers of humanistic psychology/counselling/psychotherapy.

09/05/2026

Mother’s Day can be a complicated day for being a mumma. This one’s for you.

To mother is to model. To mirror. Children watch you. They watch your mood and your reception of them. When they’re young, they define themselves by how you respond and determine their own self-worth in the context of your open arms or your distraction in a moment they needed you. When older, they want you to answer for how you did it.

That’s a tough gig… to reflect and be accountable for how you show up again and again in a relationships that is quite one sided in how it’s weighted. It’s an honour. Yes. But it’s vulnerable and sometimes heavy.

Our own mothering is patterned on what we experienced; what we wanted, what we had, and sometimes the painfulness of the gap between.

I lost a friend this week. Katherine Cunningham. A mother, fierce and strong with a raucous laugh and passionate generous heart. She spent her life helping other mothers tap into what was meaningful, forging connection between hearts and between mothers and their blood. She honoured the full arc of a woman from menarchy to menopause and beyond — the woman herself, not just her role. She saw beneath veils. Her loss lands in me like a mother-loss. She was ahead of her time and she showed up anyway.

Last night, I read a post from a friend - CEO, single mum - about how tired and hurt she is and I know today she she’ll get up and give again. Another friend when asked by her teenagers what she would like she said she’d like them to not ask anything off her for the day but to be kind and respectful.

Motherhood is an honour. But it’s also hard at times.

At some point on Mother’s Day we may put aside the hurt and the pain and show grace and delight in a moment of being celebrated. Or maybe the grace we show is to release the disappointment of not being celebrated and try to make the best of the day. But For right now let’s give a moment to the feelings. To the sadness, the loss, the grief of the gap between what we had and what we wanted. What we wished we were and the feeling of coming up short. And then - when that is done - let us practice Gratitude for what we do have. As gratitude practice is what allows us to have more of our hearts Dream … our StarFire*.

Motherhood is tough. And long. I see you mamas. 🤍 This small offering between hearts is a moment of Collective Mothering.

*this post is inspired by Katherine Cunningham. Star Fire. ⭐️ 🔥 Who spent her life reminding us of our Great Mother and her love. Wrapping her strong arms around us, filling our lungs with the breath of Spirit and now resting in peace, in Her arms. ❤️🩸🔥 🐍 🌏 love to her beloved daughter.

Also shout out to those two mentioned above. 💘

30/04/2026

Now practicing in Eltham and Thornbury/Preston. And Online from anywhere. I made a flyer so y’all know how I can support those who are looking for this 💚

24/04/2026

FAQ: How often should I see my therapist to get results? Well, that depends on what you are working on. Some issues can take targeted work in short term or a single session. Some issues run deeper. We can find a rhythm that works for you.

🧐 Longer term/Ongoing: Some people come regularly for a period of time. Weekly and fortnightly can build momentum in a body of therapy work. Counselling is considered to be under 6 months. Psychotherapy - which is about deep personality change - is like gym in that it doesn’t happen in a few sessions. Although, the way I work, we address both the thing that’s happening and the historic relational templates underneath.

👩‍🌾 Short term or single issue: Others drop in when something comes up. Even with this narrowed focus, at least 3 - 6 sessions are recommended for teasing apart the issue, finding solutions and then integrating your approach. Having clear realistic goals is essential for this work.

🥷 One longer session: I offer one single 80 min session on a particular issue to help you face the thing in front of you. Eg: Birth trauma debrief; job difficulties/ career concerns; relationship communication skills session, relationship crisis, and to face questions like: Do I get diagnosed?; What if I’m neurodivergent? Should I stay or should I go? Help me face my next family event.

If you want to talk to me, please email [email protected]
ONLINE, ELTHAM AND THORNBURY/ PRESTON

21/04/2026

Stress management includes noticing pleasure. Please take a look and go Glimmer Hunting!

18/04/2026

moving from public health to practice has interesting Shifts involved. In public there is so much code switching. There is a lot of medical language, a lot of signalling that one is compliant with systemic focuses. And yet to be centred on my clients, I want to use the language that has depth of meaning for them, not pathologising, alienating language that turns them from Person to patient.
Good read from hussey
https://www.thebrink.me/the-colonisers-couch-what-therapy-can-learn-from-the-language-of-power/

20/02/2026

hooked on thoughts? 🪝
www.belfin.com.au

26/01/2026

I would add: There can even be noise AND peace co-existing within at any one time. They can both be there. Attuning to the peace shows us that that is the clearest state within. A state that is always there even when you cant feel it.

30/11/2025

A glimmer is a lil something that pleases you, that brings you a feeling of comfort, joy, pleasure, fun, peace. What can you notice today that lifts your vibe? Here’s mine from this morning. Bees in the poppy. 🐝

27/09/2025

It’s early days but here is a theory teasing apart nuance to ADHD symptoms and seeking to distinguish between early (perhaps more ‘nature’ based) ADHD and a second type that is environmental (nurture-based) ADHD.
I am neuro-affirming as a clinician, and i think we are far off understanding neurodiversity of the human brain. (Please note this is only part of the conversation. ADHD symptoms can also look like and stem from early developmental trauma.)

“Type II ADHD: a cumulative effect of heavy, continuous digital stimulation. Very high amounts of screen use might also trigger similar problems earlier in life – preschoolers logging more than two hours a day showed a six-fold jump in clinically significant inattention compared with those watching less than half an hour per day.”

https://psyche.co/ideas/in-an-era-of-split-attention-there-is-more-than-one-type-of-adhd?fbclid=IwY2xjawND_HxleHRuA2FlbQIxMQABHkYDaJDdX2saR3J2HaokO1m1TrOuTRJgJEehVQqp3weo8O_FKVHR94IKqm7o_aem_7_ciQPF56RxAwYqYzSKSoA

ADHD is typically thought to be wired into the brain early. But many cases may be better seen as products of digital life