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The Skill Collective

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The Skill Collective

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We're clinical psychologists who help you build skills for a better life in all areas of your life.

We help build skills for a better life in the areas of wellbeing and mental health.

02/11/2026

The expectations can be overwhelming:

👺 Be successful.

👺 Be confident.

👺 Be independent.

👺 Take charge.

👺 Don’t show weakness.

👺 Have your life together.

For some men, these expectations can feel like an unwritten rulebook for how they’re supposed to behave. And when social anxiety enters the picture, those expectations can become even more overwhelming.

You see, social anxiety isn’t always just about worrying what people think. It can also involve worrying about whether you’re measuring up.

You might find yourself:

💭 Constantly comparing yourself to other men.

😟 Worrying about how you’re perceived by colleagues, friends or potential partners.

🙈 Avoiding situations where you might feel judged or exposed.

🏆 Feeling pressure to appear successful, confident or in control.

🔄 Replaying conversations and interactions, wondering whether you said or did the right thing.

It’s worth remembering that these expectations aren’t universal, and masculinity doesn’t have to look one particular way.

You don’t have to be the most successful person in the room. You don’t have to be confident all the time. And you certainly don’t have to prove your worth through achievement.

Sometimes, making room to be yourself is the most important step.

Find the weight of expectations crushing and anxiety-inducing? Chat with our psychologist Tim Cianfrini, who has a special interest in helping men, and in particular men with social anxiety. Tim can help men shift their mindset and take practical steps to reduce social anxiety. https://theskillcollective.com/tim

01/11/2026

It’s November, which means it’s Movember! 💙

Movember is a great opportunity to start conversations about men’s health – and that includes mental health.

We often talk about looking after our physical health, but our mental wellbeing deserves just as much attention.

This month, we’re encouraging men to check in with themselves, make space for conversations and remember that looking after your mental health is an important part of looking after your overall health.

A few reminders for the month:

🧠 Your mental health matters, even when life looks like it’s going well.

💬 Talking about how you’re feeling isn’t a sign of weakness.

🤝 You don’t have to work through everything on your own.

🌱 Asking for support is a worthwhile investment in yourself.

Whether you’re growing a moustache or simply starting a conversation, there’s plenty of ways to get involved.

Let’s make men’s mental health part of the conversation, this November and beyond.

Start here 👉 https://theskillcollective.com/mens-health

SubiacoPsychologist TheSkillCollective

30/10/2026

🎃 Don’t hide behind a costume…

Halloween gives us the perfect excuse to become someone else for the night. That can feel pretty appealing if you experience social anxiety:
🎃 A costume can give you something to talk about.
🎃 A persona can give you a script.

And for a little while, you don’t have to worry quite so much about people seeing the real you.

The problem is that regularly relying on a “persona” to feel socially safe, means over time you might start wondering:
🎭 Do people like me — or just the version of me I’m presenting?
💭 Am I only interesting if I have a good story to tell?
😬 What happens when I don’t know what to say?
🫣 Can I actually have a conversation without having something impressive or entertaining to contribute?

The answer isn’t to rip the costume off all at once. Think small experiments:
🎃 Take off one layer at a time.
🎃 Try asking a question instead of feeling like you need to tell an interesting story.
🎃 Let a conversation have an awkward pause.
🎃 Share something ordinary.
🎃 Admit you don’t know what to say.
—> Notice what happens when you don’t perform.

You might discover that being interesting isn’t the price of admission to a conversation. Sometimes, being genuinely curious about another person is more than enough. 🌱

And perhaps the most important experiment:
What happens when you let someone meet the person underneath the costume?

If social anxiety is making it difficult to feel comfortable being yourself around other people, this is something you can work on with a psychologist.

Several of our team have a special interest in helping those with social anxiety -> theskillcollective.com/about-us
💙 Dr Emilita Cornain, senior clinical psychologist
💙 Tim Cianfrini, registered psychologist
💙 Olivia Kingsley, registered psychologist
💙 Grace Downie, senior clinical psychologist

29/10/2026

You get home from dinner.
And your brain starts the post-event replay.
🤔 “Why did I say that?”
🤔 “Did they think I was rude?”
🤔 “Why did I laugh like that?”
🤔 “I should have said something different.”
🤔 “Did everyone notice?”

If you experience social anxiety, the post-event replay often continues well into the night, keeping you up and affecting your sleep.

One helpful question to experiment with:
“What evidence do I have that everyone experienced the evening the way my anxious brain is telling me they did?”

Sometimes anxiety gives us a very convincing story, however that doesn’t necessarily make it a fact.

28/10/2026

A common fear behind social anxiety is:
“What if people judge me?”

Here’s the uncomfortable truth:
People might judge you.
People are human.
They have opinions.

But your brain can turn:
“Someone might have an opinion about me”
into:
“Everyone will notice.”
“They’ll think I’m embarrassing.”
“They’ll remember it forever.”
“It will be awful.”

And suddenly, your mind-reading turns a five-minute conversation into a high-stakes performance.

Part of working with social anxiety is learning to tolerate the possibility of being imperfect - without treating it like a catastrophe - and dialling back the mind reading.

If the what-ifs and mind reading often cause you to spiral in social situations, reach out to our psychologists with a special interest in helping those with social anxiety  theskillcollective.com/about-us
💙 Dr Emilita Cornain, senior clinical psychologist
💙 Tim Cianfrini, registered psychologist
💙 Olivia Kingsley, registered psychologist
💙 Grace Downie, senior clinical psychologist

26/10/2026

Working on social anxiety doesn’t mean becoming:
✨ Louder
✨ More outgoing
✨ The first person to start a conversation
✨ The person dancing in the middle of the room

The goal isn’t to change your personality. It’s to give you more freedom:
🫶 Freedom to go to the party if you want to.
🫶 Freedom to leave if you want to.
🫶 Freedom to start a conversation without spending three hours rehearsing it first.
🫶 Freedom to be quiet without deciding that everyone thinks you’re weird.

You get to be yourself.
Just with a little less anxiety.

23/10/2026

‘Tis the season to be socially anxious…
Meet our Christmas Party Anxiety Checklist

If social events make you anxious, notice which of these sound familiar:
☐ Rehearsing conversations beforehand
☐ Worrying about what to wear
☐ Thinking of excuses not to go
☐ Arriving early so you don’t have to enter alone
☐ Staying close to one person all night
☐ Avoiding eye contact
☐ Drinking to feel more comfortable
☐ Analysing everything you said afterwards
☐ Assuming people noticed every awkward moment

If several of these sound familiar, you’re not necessarily “just shy”.
It may be worth understanding what’s happening underneath the anxiety.

And October is a much nicer time to start than December 23rd. 😉

This is one of the areas that our psychologists can help with. Reach out to the following psychologists with a special interest in helping those with social anxiety  theskillcollective.com/about-us
·      Dr Emilita Cornain, senior clinical psychologist
·      Tim Cianfrini, registered psychologist
·      Olivia Kingsley, registered psychologist
·      Grace Downie, senior clinical psychologist

21/10/2026

Take what you need from this today 🫶
 

19/10/2026

Social anxiety can create a frustrating cycle:
 
Faced with a scary situation...
⬇️ The brain sees it as a threat.
⬇️ “I might embarrass myself.”
⬇️ “I need to make sure I don’t.”
⬇️ Avoid or escape the situation.
⬇️ Feel relieved.
⬇️ Your brain learns: “Good thing we avoided that!”
⬇️ Over time, with repeated avoidance, social situations feel even scarier. 
What if there’s a way to reduce your fear?
 The goal isn’t to force yourself into every uncomfortable situation. Rather, it’s to gradually learn that discomfort isn’t necessarily danger. 
That you can cope with the feelings that come with being seen, making mistakes and not being completely in control. 🫶
 Our psychologists can work with you to reduce your fear. Reach out to the following psychologists who have a special interest in supporting those with social anxiety  theskillcollective.com/about-us
· Dr Emilita Cornain, senior clinical psychologist
· Tim Cianfrini, registered psychologist
· Olivia Kingsley, registered psychologist
· Grace Downie, senior clinical psychologist
 

16/10/2026

It’s only October...

…but if you experience social anxiety, you may already be thinking about the months ahead!

Cue the dreaded:

🎄 Work Christmas party.

🎄 Family gatherings.

🎄 End-of-year events.

🎄 Drinks with people you don’t know very well.

🎄 The obligatory “so, what are you doing next year?” conversation.

Social anxiety can make situations that look completely ordinary from the outside feel exhausting on the inside.

And whilst avoiding them brings short-term relief, it makes the anxiety stronger in the long run.

If social situations are already taking up a lot of mental space, October can actually be a useful time to start working on it.

Not because you need to become the life of the party, but so you can feel more comfortable being yourself around other people. 🌱

Start with this article:

Christmas parties: A guide for the socially anxious 👉 https://theskillcollective.com/blog/christmas-parties-a-guide-for-the-socially-anxious

And if you’d like more targeted ahead of the silly season, reach out to our psychologists and ask for Tim, Emilita, Olivia, or Grace (theskillcollective.com/about-us)

TheSkillCollective

Address

Unit 5b/1 Station St
Subiaco, WA
6008

Opening Hours

Monday	10am - 7pm
Tuesday	10am - 7pm
Wednesday	10am - 7pm
Thursday	10am - 7pm
Friday	10am - 2pm

Website

http://www.theskillcollective.com/

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