11/03/2026
Why Doesn't Telling Your Child to Take a Deep Breath Work? | With Pooja Tolani
You've told your child to take a deep breath. They roll their eyes, get more frustrated, or insist that breathing doesn't help.
So why does a strategy meant to support emotional regulation sometimes make things worse?
In this episode of Overpowering Emotions, Dr. Caroline welcomes meditation and breathwork instructor Pooja Tolani from the Art of Living Foundation to explore how breathing affects stress, emotions and our ability to respond to difficult moments.
Pooja shares her unexpected introduction to meditation, a simple breathing technique called straw breathing, and why learning to notice your breath can be a useful starting point.
Dr. Caroline also shares a personal story about her young daughter attempting meditation and explains why modelling regulation can be more helpful than repeatedly telling children to calm down.
You'll discover why meditation doesn't require an empty mind, how breathing practices can become part of everyday routines, and why consistency matters more than waiting until emotions are already overwhelming.
Homework activities
The episode offers several practices that adults can try themselves before introducing them to children.
Activity 1: Practise straw breathing
Pooja demonstrates inhaling through the nose, then exhaling gently through a small opening in the lips, as though breathing through a straw.
Try a comfortable inhale of around four counts and a longer, unforced exhale, working towards eight counts if it feels natural.
Activity 2: Create a seven-day breathing tracker
Choose a consistent time for a short daily breathing or meditation practice. Mark each day you complete it.
Activity 3: Model regulation without instructions
When a child becomes upset, notice your own breathing, posture and tone.
Practise staying steady without immediately asking the child to calm down or copy you.
Activity 4: Notice breathing patterns throughout the day
Pause during an ordinary moment and observe your breathing. Notice whether it becomes faster, slower or shallower when your emotional state changes.
Activity 5: Find support for consistency
Pooja recommends community support to help maintain regular practice.
Explore a suitable class, breathing group or shared routine with a friend.
About Pooja Tolani
Pooja Tolani has spent over three decades with the Art of Living Foundation, teaching courses and delivering wellness programs with more than 475,000 training hours. Her work has taken her across India, Europe, Canada, the United States, and Central America, serving diverse communities in some of the world’s most demanding environments.
She is also a trained yoga, breathwork, and meditation teacher. Her expertise and contributions to wellness have been featured on Global TV, City TV, and CTV Calgary.
Through her extensive experience, Pooja brings valuable wisdom and practical insights into wellness, mindfulness, and emotional regulation.
Links and Resources:
Official organisation website: https://www.artofliving.org/
Pooja Tolani email: [email protected]
