12/15/2025
Sometimes the hardest part of relationships isn’t what is happening — it’s what might be quietly crossing a line.
Boundaries aren’t about control or mistrust. They’re about protecting what matters most. Healthy boundaries create safety, clarity, and trust — and they help committed relationships thrive, not just survive.
One helpful way to think about relationship boundaries comes from Shirley P. Glass in Not “Just Friends”. She uses a simple but powerful metaphor:
Where are the walls, and where are the windows?
In healthy, committed relationships:
-Walls protect the couple from outside emotional or relational intrusions
-Windows allow openness, transparency, and connection within the relationship
Problems often begin when:
-Walls come down with someone outside the relationship.
-Windows close with the person we’re committed to.
This doesn’t start with betrayal — it usually starts with small shifts: private conversations, emotional reliance, or blurred lines that feel harmless at first.
A useful litmus test for fidelity is asking:
-Would I feel comfortable if my partner saw or knew about this interaction?
-Am I moving toward or away from my partner right now?
Strong relationships aren’t built on avoiding people — they’re built on clear boundaries, intentional connection, and honest conversations.
If you’ve noticed tension, uncertainty, or unspoken worries in your relationship, support can help bring clarity and alignment.
Visit bsbcounselling.ca to reach out for a free consultation.
