13/10/2026
One of the greatest things I’ve learned from Judith Hanson Lasater is that no one can make me feel anything without my permission.
I’m responsible for my own emotional state. And I’m not responsible for anyone else’s.
That second part is where many of us get stuck. If you’ve spent years caring for others, you probably know the reflex. Someone you love is upset, and you rush in to fix it.
For me, it’s my children. It’s so hard to watch your child suffer, and it’s natural to want to make them happy when they’re upset. But one of our most important jobs as parents is teaching our children how to be with uncomfortable emotions. And that’s almost impossible if we can’t be with our own.
When someone we love is upset, it can wake up our own hurt child. Healing those wounds is one of the most responsible things we can do.
Their feelings are theirs to feel. Your work is to stay steady enough to be there while they do.