Sarah O’Callaghan Therapy

Sarah O’Callaghan Therapy Accredited CBT and EMDR psychotherapist
Parental Burnout Specialist
North East and Nationwide

Imagine telling a friend over a cuppa that you feel like a terrible mum. They’d probably reassure you. They might tell y...
16/09/2026

Imagine telling a friend over a cuppa that you feel like a terrible mum. They’d probably reassure you. They might tell you that you’re a good mum and remind you of the things you do for your children. You’d probably do the same for them if they said it to you the other day. You’d have a chat, have a cuppa and they’d probably feel a bit better afterwards.

But when you have OCD, you might try to give yourself that same reassurance. You might start going over all the evidence that you’re actually a good mum. You might remind yourself of everything you do for your children and use that to challenge the thought that you’re a terrible mum.

And this is where it can get a bit sneaky.

Looking at the evidence can be a really useful CBT strategy. But with OCD, it’s worth asking yourself why you’re doing it.

Are you challenging the thought because it’s unhelpful? Or are you trying to prove to yourself that you’re a good mum?

Because if you need to prove it, OCD can keep moving the goalposts. You might feel reassured for a while, but then another memory pops up, or you remember something you did wrong, or you wonder whether you could have done more.

And then you’re back to trying to work it all out again.

The aim isn’t to convince yourself that you’re definitely a good mum every time the thought comes up. It’s learning that you don’t need to get an answer to that question.

You can have the thought ‘I’m a terrible mum’ without having to prove that it isn’t true.

📚Non-fiction books that kept me thinking on holiday 📚For some people, fiction is the perfect way to switch off. For me, ...
03/09/2026

📚Non-fiction books that kept me thinking on holiday 📚

For some people, fiction is the perfect way to switch off. For me, it’s non-fiction. I love getting lost in real stories, different perspectives and ideas that make me stop and think. A long road-trip holiday gave me the perfect chance to finally get stuck into some of the books I just don’t have time for in everyday life. Here’s what I read:

1. Who’s the Favourite? by Catherine Carr
An interesting look at sibling relationships, family dynamics and how differently children can experience the same family.

2. Strong Female Character by Fern Brady
Late to the party with this one! A brilliant memoir exploring autism, women, stereotypes and the ableist views that still surround neurodiversity. We still have a long way to go.

3. Hold Fast by Catherine Simpson
As a parent of an autistic child, I really resonated with the battles with the education system, although our stories are very different. I also found the idea of the label ‘autistic mum’ really interesting.

4. I’m Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy
Another classic! An honest and difficult memoir about childhood, fame, abuse, control and ultimately finding your own voice.

All available to borrow from 📚 to support your ongoing therapeutic journey.

Coming to the end of three weeks travelling around Europe with the family 🇳🇱 🇦🇹 🇸🇮 🇭🇷 🇩🇪 And yes, I’m pretty sure this t...
26/08/2026

Coming to the end of three weeks travelling around Europe with the family 🇳🇱 🇦🇹 🇸🇮 🇭🇷 🇩🇪

And yes, I’m pretty sure this trend is dead and buried by now 😂 But after a month long Instagram hiatus, I thought I may as well use it anyway!

Before the holiday, there was a lot going on at home and work has continued to be busy. Any other therapists who run their own business will know that sometimes it’s really hard to take your foot off the gas when you’re the one running the show.

I knew I hadn’t posted for a while, but honestly, I got to the point where I almost stopped caring. Which I’m sure every bit of marketing advice would tell me not to do. The algorithm is a thing, right? 😂

But actually, it’s been quite nice to let Instagram take a back seat. I’m very grateful that being my own boss means I can choose when I take time off. Although the reality is that there’s usually the odd email, enquiry call or bit of admin that still needs sorting while you’re away.

And three weeks travelling with two pre teens, both with their own personalities, developmental stages and individual needs and neurodiversity, has definitely had its moments. Some amazing days, some really challenging ones, some mixed weather and a fair few moments where everyone’s tolerance levels were running pretty low!

But that’s family life I guess! The photos are the good bits. The beautiful places, the adventures, the memories. And they’re all real. They’re just not the whole story.

Anyway, I’ve survived three weeks, missed approximately 400 Instagram trends and wonder what the wrath of Instagram Gods will be 🙄

(And also secretly squealing with delight that it’s nearly autumn and the best season of them all is nearly here! 🍂🤎)

22/07/2026

In more entrenched cases of OCD, the feared event itself feels like the problem. It might be “what if I harm my baby?” or “what if I make the wrong decision and something awful happens?”. The fear feels very real, and your brain does what brains do- it tries to protect you by finding ways to prevent the danger.

You might start checking, replaying conversations, analysing situations, seeking reassurance, or trying to think through every possible outcome. The problem is that OCD keeps asking for more certainty, and no amount of thinking ever feels like enough.

Over time, as more worries appear and more “what ifs” get attached, something can shift. The fear can become less about the original feared event and more about your own mind. You start to fear what thought might appear next, what it might mean, or whether you can trust yourself if your brain is capable of producing such a thought.

This is one of the most distressing parts of OCD, particularly for mums who care deeply about doing the right thing. The thing you are trying to protect your child from can start to feel like it is coming from inside your own head.

But the problem isn’t that you have these thoughts. Intrusive thoughts are a normal part of being human. The problem is OCD convincing you that the thought is important, dangerous, or something that needs to be solved.

Recovery isn’t about creating a mind that never produces scary thoughts. It’s about learning that thoughts can show up without needing to be analysed, neutralised, or treated as an emergency.

☀️ Summer holidays are here! For many of us, there’s a huge sense of relief. No more rushing through school mornings, ma...
17/07/2026

☀️ Summer holidays are here! For many of us, there’s a huge sense of relief. No more rushing through school mornings, making packed lunches, hunting for missing shoes, whilst simultaneously trying to remember everything you need for work and looking vaguely presentable. 😂 But where one pressure ends… another begins!

Any chance we might get for a cheeky little doom scroll, we are met with sensationalist memes, bold statements and black-and-white messages about parenting, relationships and ‘learn this truth’ style preaching— often with little to no context (thank you for sharing the example of being sent to your room as a child = childhood trauma and highlighting just how much nuance can get lost online. 🙄)

This summer, I want to remind you: not every viral post is a universal truth and not every uncomfortable feeling or challenging day means you’ve done something wrong.

Context always matters. Save this post for the moments Instagram has you questioning everything.

One of the most common fears I see in mums with anxiety and OCD is:“If something goes wrong, it will be my responsibilit...
10/07/2026

One of the most common fears I see in mums with anxiety and OCD is:

“If something goes wrong, it will be my responsibility because I should have prevented it.”

Parenting comes with responsibility, but sometimes that responsibility becomes distorted. Instead of accepting uncertainty, it can feel like you have to prevent everything from going wrong.

Here are five experiences that can sometimes contribute:

1. Trying to give your children the emotional safety you didn’t have.

You may feel determined to protect your child from the things you experienced, taking responsibility for preventing any hurt or struggle.

2. Growing up with chaos or unpredictability.

Being on high alert may have helped you cope in the past. As a parent, this can become feeling responsible for anticipating every problem.

3. Believing good parenting means self-sacrifice.

You may feel that a good mum puts everyone else first and takes responsibility for everything.

4. Perfectionism and fear of getting parenting wrong.

Mistakes can feel bigger than they are, turning normal parenting moments into evidence that you’re failing.

5. A difficult journey to parenthood.

After infertility, pregnancy loss, or a long journey to becoming a parent, it can feel even harder to tolerate uncertainty and not get everything “right.”

These experiences don’t mean you will develop OCD or anxiety.

Many people develop OCD without having experienced these things, and OCD is influenced by a combination of factors.

Share this with a mum who feels like the weight of the world is on her shoulders, or who feels responsible for things no parent could ever fully control.

I’ve worked in private practice for a number of years, but making the leap into full-time private practice was a huge de...
09/07/2026

I’ve worked in private practice for a number of years, but making the leap into full-time private practice was a huge decision.

I left my NHS role after 22 years of working hard, starting out in support roles alongside my first degree and building my career from the ground up. The NHS gave me so much experience, shaped the therapist I am today, and I’ll always value the people and learning that came with that journey.

But there came a point where I knew I wanted to create something different. A space where I could work in a way that felt aligned with my values and the kind of support I wanted people to receive.

If you asked me what it’s like to be a therapist with my own private practice, I’d tell you it’s great.

But if you asked me on a deeper level, I’d tell you it carries a lot of responsibility. I don’t switch off easily because I care deeply about the people I work with. I think about my clients between sessions, I reflect on what might help them move forward, and I’m always learning because I never want to become complacent in this work.

The biggest difference for me is that I no longer have to compromise my integrity. I have the freedom to tailor therapy to the individual sitting in front of me, rather than asking someone to fit into a service spec. I can invest in training that genuinely benefits my clients and make decisions based on what I feel is clinically right.

I’ve also been able to create a way of working that allows me to be present for my own family. I don’t have to ration annual leave around school assemblies and holidays. I can build my work around the moments that matter at home, which means I can show up fully for the clients who trust me with their stories.

Running a private practice isn’t just about working for myself. It’s about creating a space where people feel understood, where therapy can be thoughtful and individual, and where I can continue to grow as a therapist.

The responsibility is huge, but so is the privilege.

And I’d tell you it’s absolutely worth it. 👌

A conversation with a client recently made me reflect on something we often misunderstand about therapy. They were talki...
03/07/2026

A conversation with a client recently made me reflect on something we often misunderstand about therapy. They were talking about why they felt clearer after a session with me, even though they had already had the same conversation with family and friends. What stood out for them was that I hadn’t actually told them anything they didn’t already know. I hadn’t told them they were making the right decision or given them the answer. The shift came from having space to slow things down and begin to untangle their own thinking without other people’s opinions filling the gaps.

It led into a bigger conversation about what people expect therapy to be. There is often an assumption that therapists are there to give advice or tell people what they should do. My work is informed by psychological theory, research and clinical experience, but that doesn’t make me the authority on somebody else’s life. My role is to help people understand themselves well enough that they can begin to trust their own judgement.

I also think it’s important for clients to see that therapists are human. I make mistakes and I don’t get everything right. I don’t sit on a pedestal. I don’t think being a good therapist means presenting as if you have life figured out. Sometimes that realisation gives people permission to stop holding themselves to that standard too.

Follow for more therapy insights, or enquire via the link in my bio if you want to work with a therapist who is human too.

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