Clear Heart Counselling

10/06/2026

This reminds me of the movie Guru, place your hand on your heart and say All is well… 🌹💕

10/06/2026

New service to support farmers. 💕

Farmers or crofters who are anxious about their cattle registrations are being offered a new service organised by contacting RSABI.

The service will see farmers and crofters being able to request confidential advice and guidance from an independent cattle registration specialist, simply by calling the charity’s 24 hour helpline – 0808 1234 555 – or emailing [email protected].

The aim is to encourage farmers who may find themselves struggling with any aspect of cattle registrations to seek help and advice at as early a stage as possible, before things start to spiral into greater difficulties.

“It is estimated that around 25% of Scottish farmers are dyslexic and this is one of a number of reasons people can struggle with keeping cattle registrations up to date,” said Carol McLaren, Chief Executive of RSABI.

“Unexpected challenges in farming and family life can mean paperwork can sometimes start to slip and, whether due to bereavement, accident, injury or health conditions, important administration like cattle registrations can start to fall behind when life gets really tough.”

Ideally farmers or crofters who fall behind or are worried about their situation should contact ScotEID (on 01466 794323 or email [email protected]), with the new RSABI service offering a confidential stepping stone to support people to act quickly.

More info here: https://www.rsabi.org.uk/new-service-offering-cattle-registration-guidance/

10/06/2026

Please share.

Farmers or crofters who are anxious about their cattle registrations are being offered a new service organised by contacting RSABI.

The service will see farmers and crofters being able to request confidential advice and guidance from an independent cattle registration specialist, simply by calling the charity’s 24 hour helpline – 0808 1234 555 – or emailing [email protected].

The aim is to encourage farmers who may find themselves struggling with any aspect of cattle registrations to seek help and advice at as early a stage as possible, before things start to spiral into greater difficulties.

“It is estimated that around 25% of Scottish farmers are dyslexic and this is one of a number of reasons people can struggle with keeping cattle registrations up to date,” said Carol McLaren, Chief Executive of RSABI.

“Unexpected challenges in farming and family life can mean paperwork can sometimes start to slip and, whether due to bereavement, accident, injury or health conditions, important administration like cattle registrations can start to fall behind when life gets really tough.”

Ideally farmers or crofters who fall behind or are worried about their situation should contact ScotEID (on 01466 794323 or email [email protected]), with the new RSABI service offering a confidential stepping stone to support people to act quickly.

More info here: https://www.rsabi.org.uk/new-service-offering-cattle-registration-guidance/

14/05/2026

❤️

I have learned over a period of time to be almost unconsciously grateful – as a child is – for a sunny day, blue water, flowers in a vase, a tree turning red. I have learned to be glad at dawn and when the sky is dark.

Only children and a few spiritually evolved people are born to feel gratitude as naturally as they breathe, without even thinking. Most of us come to it step by painful step, to discover that gratitude is a form of acceptance.

~ Faith Baldwin

[Art: Elena Wuest]

14/05/2026

💕

Always ❤️

30/04/2026

On New Year's Eve, your daughter sent an email listing everything you did wrong since she was six. Oh, you son too, he's stopped returning calls for over a year now.

Your child, the one you rocked through fevers, taught to read, drove to soccer practice, sat up worrying about when they'd come home, has decided you're the villain in their story. And you're supposed to what? Just accept it, move on, pretend your heart isn't walking around out there in a body that won't acknowledge you exist?

That's the unspeakable pain Sheri McGregor writes about in Done With The Crying. The kind that makes people at parties change the subject when you mention it. The kind therapists don't quite know what to do with because there's no diagnosis for loving someone who's chosen to erase you.

McGregor knows this grief from the inside. One of her five adult children cut off all contact. No explanation that made sense. Just gone. And in that particular hell, the one where you scroll through old photos trying to pinpoint when you lost them, where every Mother's Day is a fresh wound, where you jump every time the phone rings thinking maybe, maybe this time, she had to figure out how to keep living.

Done With The Crying is the map she drew for getting out. And here's why the book is a helpful and worthwhile read:

1. It validates a pain most people refuse to acknowledge.
When McGregor says "you have the right to grieve," it sounds simple. But for parents experiencing estrangement, it's revolutionary. Because society tells them they don't get to grieve. They caused this. They should fix it. They should keep trying until their child forgives them.

2. It refuses to automatically blame the parent.
Most resources on estrangement assume parental abuse or serious dysfunction. And yes, some estrangements happen for valid reasons, like parents who were genuinely harmful, relationships that needed to end for the adult child's well-being. But McGregor addresses the other reality: sometimes good parents get estranged too. Sometimes mental illness, addiction, or outside influences pull adult children away. Sometimes the reasons given don't match the relationship that actually existed.

McGregor doesn't excuse genuinely abusive parents. But she also doesn't assume every estranged parent deserves it. And for parents who know they weren't perfect but also weren't monsters, that distinction matters desperately.

3. It teaches you to stop waiting for reconciliation to live your life.
Many estranged parents put their entire lives on hold waiting for their child to come back. They don't make plans, don't pursue happiness, don't move forward because what if their child reaches out and they've moved on? McGregor says: you can't live like that. You can leave the door open - and many parents do - but you can't spend the rest of your life in the waiting room.

She teaches practical strategies for accepting the reality of estrangement while still holding space for hope. For building a life that has meaning even if reconciliation never comes.

4. It addresses the complicated emotions nobody talks about.
Grief, yes. But also anger. Confusion. Betrayal. Relief, sometimes, which then creates guilt. The bizarre experience of mourning someone who's still alive. The triggers; Mother's Day, their birthday, seeing their friends post on social media. The secondary losses: grandchildren you'll never meet, milestones you'll never witness, the future you imagined that will never exist. McGregor doesn't shy away from any of it. She names the mess and says: you're not broken for feeling this way.

I need to point this out: Some critics say McGregor is too one-sided, that she doesn't adequately consider that maybe these parents actually were harmful and their adult children had good reasons to leave. And that's fair. This is a book explicitly for parents who feel unjustly accused. It's not trying to be balanced. It's trying to be a lifeline for people drowning in shame and confusion.

If you're a parent who was genuinely abusive and your child cut you off to protect themselves, this probably isn't your book. If you're looking for guidance on how to take accountability for real harm, you need different resources.

But if you're a parent who made normal parenting mistakes, who wasn't perfect but also wasn't abusive, who's been blindsided by estrangement and can't find anyone who will validate that sometimes adult children are wrong, this book will feel like oxygen.

BOOK: https://amzn.to/3QOeWnX

05/03/2026

This is one of the best books for anyone who has experienced a sudden loss.

Brook Noel's younger brother, Caleb, died suddenly at just 27 years old from an unexpected allergic reaction to a bee sting while on a fishing trip. Gone. Just like that. No warning. No goodbye. No chance to say any of the thousand things you assume you'll have time to say.

Pamela Blair's ex-husband, the father of her child, collapsed from a cerebral aneurysm. Died almost instantly. One moment standing, the next on the floor, and then just... nothing. The person who'd been in her life for years, who shared custody of their daughter, who was supposed to pick her up next weekend, ceased to exist between breaths.

These are the two women who wrote "I Wasn't Ready to Say Goodbye." Not therapists who studied grief from a distance or researchers who interviewed the bereaved and took notes. But two people who lived through the specific hell of sudden death, where reality fractures so completely you can't trust that anything is real anymore.

1. Sudden Death Doesn't Just Take a Person, It Breaks Reality Itself
Noel and Blair name something hard to articulate: sudden death is different. When someone dies after illness, you have time. Time to say goodbye. Time to prepare. But sudden death? One moment they exist, the next they don't, and your brain can't process it. Keeps expecting them to walk through the door because they were just here, just alive, just real.

2. There's No "Right Way" to Grieve; There's Only Survival
Everyone has opinions about how you should grieve. How long you should be sad. When you should "move on." Whether you're crying too much or not enough. All of it makes it worse. Noel and Blair gave us the only permission that mattered: there's no right way. Some days you can function. Some days you can't get out of bed. Some days, you want to talk about him/her constantly. Some days, hearing his/her name feels like a knife. None of this is wrong. All of it is grief.

3. You Don't "Get Over It." You Learn to Carry It
Here's the lie: "Time heals all wounds." Bu****it. Time doesn't heal sudden loss. Time just teaches you how to function while carrying a grief that never gets smaller. You don't move on. You don't get closure. You just learn to live with a wound that doesn't close. You build your life around the absence. You get stronger at carrying the weight. But the weight doesn't go away.

This book won't bring anyone back. Nothing can do that. It won't make the grief smaller or the wound less deep. But it does something more important: it sits with you in the wreckage. It says: I know. I've been here. I've felt this. And I'm still breathing. Still here. Still carrying someone I wasn't ready to say goodbye to. And somehow, that's something.

Noel and Blair, two women who lost people they loved without warning, without goodbye, without any of the closure we're told we need, are proof that you can carry it. That you can survive the unsurvivable.

That you can be "not ready" to say goodbye for the rest of your life, and still find ways to keep living.

10/01/2026

This. Hits. Hard.

The inability to receive support from others is a trauma response.

Your “I don’t need anyone, I’ll just do it all myself” conditioning is a survival tactic. And you needed it to shield your heart from abuse, neglect, betrayal, and disappointment from those who could not or would not be there for you.

From the parent who was absent and abandoned you by choice or the parent who was never home from working three jobs to feed and house you.

From the lovers who offered sexual intimacy but never offered a safe haven that honored your heart.

From the friendships and family who ALWAYS took more than they ever gave.

From all the situations when someone told you “we’re in this together” or “I got you” then abandoned you, leaving you to pick up the pieces when s**t got real, leaving you to handle your part and their part, too.

From all the lies and all the betrayals.

You learned along the way that you just couldn’t really trust people. Or that you could trust people, but only up to a certain point.

Extreme-independence IS. A. TRUST. ISSUE.

You learnt: if I don’t put myself in a situation where I rely on someone, I won’t have to be disappointed when they don’t show up for me, or when they drop the ball... because they will ALWAYS drop the ball EVENTUALLY right?

You may even have been intentionally taught this protection strategy by generations of hurt ancestors who came before you.

Extreme-independence is a preemptive strike against heartbreak.

So, you don’t trust anyone.

And you don’t trust yourself, either, to choose people.

To trust is to hope, to trust is to be vulnerable.

“Never again,” you vow.

But no matter how you dress it up and display it proudly to make it seem like this level of independence is what you always wanted to be, in truth it’s your wounded, scarred, broken heart behind a protective brick wall.

Impenetrable. Nothing gets in. No hurt gets in. But no love gets in either.

Fortresses and armor are for those in battle, or who believe the battle is coming.

It’s a trauma response.

The good news is trauma that is acknowledged is trauma that can be healed.

You are worthy of having support.
You are worthy of having true partnership.
You are worthy of love.
You are worthy of having your heart held.
You are worthy to be adored.
You are worthy to be cherished.
You are worthy to have someone say, “You rest. I got this.” And actually deliver on that promise.
You are worthy to receive.
You are worthy to receive.
You are worthy.

You don’t have to earn it.
You don’t have to prove it.
You don’t have to bargain for it.
You don’t have to beg for it.

You are worthy.
Worthy.
Simply because you exist.

~Jamila White

art | Zima Angela

09/01/2026

Wonderful idea! Please share with your friends. 🥰

"My name is Helen, I'm a hairdresser and I have my own salon on the beautiful waterfront opposite that beautiful red heart, I also have a little takeaway coffee bar here.

I want to help people, that's why I asked you here. I want to help them understand that they can navigate through what is going on in their heads. I want to remind them that there's nothing "wrong" with them and I wanted to find a way to help one another, especially women. It stems from my own experience, trying to navigate it almost 6 years ago when we went into lockdown. I thought that's what it was but it was actually my hormones as I was going through the perimenopause. The pandemic was the catalyst that brought it to the surface.

I would love to set up a coffee and chat, informal chat group. Aimed at women who feel lost or are unsure how to navigate whatever it is they're going through. There's plenty for men out there which is amazing but I'd like to create a safe space right here in my salon, where we can meet regularly. I have contacts in the wellness industry and they are very happy to support me should it get up and running.

I ran a wee treat last year with Nicolle and the feedback was great, time constraints have been why we never got another one going. We set it up at The Kings, we walked along the beach, did some mindfulness stuff. About 2 years ago I tried to get one set up, this is a bad time for people. We're made to believe that Christmas has to be special from a commercial perspective, and I've learned in the last few years that Christmas is what you make of it. Then January comes along, the dark mornings, the grey weather, it affects so many people out there.

All you need is space, time, love and peace, and to just be present, but I've felt this need to help others. This is a great community, there's a lot happening and there's a lot to come, so many of us see the potential for Kirkcaldy. Levenmouths resurgence has been great, there's independent shops and down here in the Merchants Quarter, it's great and it can be better if there was a few more shops filled.

I've spoken to our local MP who helped secure funding for the area, I really hope so it'll make a difference but it's down to us to take advantage of that. Change starts with the people because it's a great town, but we could be better by working together. The community should come together and support us, I'm not a negative person but there's a lot of it out there sadly, many people go elsewhere and that's their choice, but it's our choice to have these businesses. We can provide these service to our community, but without local help, it's not sustainable.

My idea for the group is to create a nice friendly, cosy and warm open space and that what gets shared in here stays in here. It's about chatting, finding a likemindedness, you just don't know who'll walk through that door. I'd like to do more social stuff, maybe a sauna and a cold dip, I love hot and cold therapy. When the nights become lighter, we can do a barefoot walk on the beach, listen to the waves. Find a way to disconnect from the world together.

It's about building a community for people who need it, and introducing them to things they've never done. To escape their comfort zone, and to find likeminded people who will look after one another but also feel seen and feel loved, because all we ever seek is love, we all deserve that after all. I want people to feel safe, but also held and loved because that's important to me. People will be uncertain thinking it's just another group, but it is and will be, a special place for people to come"

Thank you to Helen for meeting me at Pier 88 the other day, it was lovely listening to how passionate you feel about helping others. The first meet up is on Thursday 22nd of Jan at 6pm

Please consider sharing this if you would like to support Helen in making her idea a reality and tag any other groups out there that supports women.