20/08/2026
On 18.08 - it was 7 years 🩷
Leo was birthed and died.
I remember going into spontaneous labour - the power of the contractions so strong that there was nothing to do but ride the waves.
I birthed him breach onto the bathroom floor
His beautiful, perfect body flopped lifeless on the ground
I was in shock, numb at what had happened
The days, weeks and months that followed were horrendous
My milk came in
No baby to hold
Hormones all over the place
The joy sucked out of my life.
I think back to that time - I was angry, distressed and hopeless
My relationship was breaking down
I was a totally mess
I was unable to dress myself let alone look after my other child.
“This wasn’t meant to happen!”
How do reconcile burying your own child?
How do you ever overcome such a tragedy?
It was all too much.
For those of you suffering with the deep pain of grief
Please know…
There is a way through this pain
When you learn to be with your grief rather than run from it
It becomes a force that unlocks your heart
It becomes a doorway that you can step through
The scars of grief become cracks where your essence can shine through
The essence of you doesn’t go away - it just gets covered in pain and trauma
Grief is a powerful healing force to clear the path for something new to shine through you
It’s possible to integrate the pain where you can find joy and a deeper love
Your perspective can shift so you can view life with gratitude rather than pain
The loss of my little boy broke open my heart
I love deeper because of him in all aspects of my life
I have more of myself available because of him
I am wiser because of his loss
The death of a loved one is never in vain
They bring deep healing - when you are ready.
My beautiful boy - with me forever in my heart and every cell of my being
So grateful to have carried you and seen your beautiful face
Honouring you today and every day 🩷
