20/07/2026
๐๐ซ๐ ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ ๐ฌ๐ก๐ฒ๐ข๐ง๐ ๐๐ฐ๐๐ฒ ๐๐ซ๐จ๐ฆ ๐ข๐ง๐๐จ๐ง๐ ๐ซ๐ฎ๐๐ง๐๐ ๐ข๐ง ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ๐ซ ๐๐ฅ๐ข๐๐ง๐ญ๐ฌ? ๐๐ง๐ ๐ฐ๐ก๐๐ญ ๐ฆ๐ข๐ ๐ก๐ญ ๐ข๐ญ ๐๐ ๐๐จ๐ฌ๐ญ๐ข๐ง๐ ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ ๐๐จ๐ญ๐ก?
When the structure of a session is intentionally focused on the client's narrative and you are channelling your attention and effort through active listening, the client's nonverbal behaviour takes a back seat.
But there are still moments where you get a sense that their narrative content and their overall communication package is in some way misaligned.
Without the certainty in knowing how to shine a light on the behaviour in a way that enhances the therapeutic alliance, you allow the moment to pass and continue with the session out of fear of coming across as judging or confrontational.
And yet, that moment stays in your mind. It does so for a reason.
A part of you, a part of both of you actually, knew there was something there, but it was glossed over. .
Politely, calmly, smoothly. But costly.
The cost to you is that by ignoring those signals, doubt and uncertainty creeps into your mind and leads to second guessing your ability and therapeutic decisions.
The cost to your client is that they miss out on the opportunity to pause, reflect and explore the very perceptions, decisions and actions contributing to their problem.
The end result is you being described as warm and friendly, but not the person who helped them move.
When you open your attention to all of the different channels of nonverbal behaviour, your personal experience shifts from โtryingโ and โeffortfully listeningโ, to relaxing into a space of calm observation.
The impact on your system is huge.
And when you then combine that with the ONCE technique (Observe, Notice, Connect, Enquire), you bring a lightness and curiosity to your session that welcomes these types of explorations.
Your client shifts - and you become their trusted guide.
How do you cultivate curiosity in your sessions?
