Petch Psychology

26/05/2026

We talk a lot about executive functioning skills in ADHD and Autism assessments. These are the brains management system. Difficulties in EF are common in both ADHD and ASC which is why finding life hacks that work for you is so important!

Executive function is basically the brain’s “management system.”
It helps you start tasks, stay focused, regulate emotions, manage time, organize information, remember details, and switch between activities without mentally crashing.

When executive function works smoothly, daily life feels manageable.
When it struggles — which is very common in ADHD, Autism, anxiety, depression, burnout, and trauma — even simple tasks can feel strangely impossible.

A lot of people think executive dysfunction means laziness or lack of discipline.
It doesn’t.

It means the brain is having difficulty coordinating the mental skills needed to do the thing, even when the person genuinely wants to do it.

That is why someone can:

Know a task is important
Think about it all day
Feel guilty about avoiding it
Still feel physically unable to begin

The image highlights some major executive function skills:

• Starting tasks
Many ADHD brains struggle with “task initiation.” The hardest part is often beginning, not doing.

• Shifting focus
Transitioning from one activity to another can feel mentally painful, especially after hyperfocus.

• Paying attention
Attention in ADHD is often interest-based, not importance-based.

• Prioritizing
Everything can feel equally urgent or equally impossible.

• Planning ahead
Executive dysfunction can make future planning feel abstract until pressure becomes immediate.

• Time management
Many people with ADHD experience “time blindness,” where estimating time feels unreliable.

• Remembering details
Working memory difficulties can make instructions disappear seconds after hearing them.

• Emotional regulation
Strong emotions may feel fast, intense, and difficult to slow down.

• Organization
Not because the person is careless, but because maintaining systems consistently requires executive energy.

One of the biggest misunderstandings about ADHD is assuming the problem is attention alone.
In reality, executive function affects almost every part of life:
relationships, school, work, routines, emotional control, self-esteem, and even basic daily tasks.

And when people finally understand this, many stop seeing themselves as “broken” and start realizing their brain simply needs different supports, structure, and compassion.

23/05/2026

YoungMinds Parent Support helpline 0808 802 5544

23/05/2026

Although it isn’t one of the diagnostic criteria, RSD is such a common feature of ADHD. It can really impact friendships, family relationships and self esteem, as well as making it tough to hear what is meant as helpful feedback!

Some children don’t just dislike criticism — they feel undone by it.
A small correction, a friend saying no, or a moment of exclusion can land as deep rejection.

This isn’t being dramatic or fragile.
It’s a nervous system reacting to the fear of disconnection.

Rejection sensitivity often shows up in childhood and, without support, can quietly follow someone into adulthood — shaping relationships, confidence, and behaviour in ways that are frequently misunderstood.

02/05/2026

Another happy customer and some lovely feedback following an ADHD and autism assessment 🥰…
“I’m really pleased to have chosen Dr Vikky. Everything has been managed in a professional and sensible manner. I appreciated that I was provided with detailed answers to all my questions and I was given all the extra information that I asked for. I would really recommend Dr Vikky”

28/04/2026

🌟Did you know I also offer adult ADHD assessments ? Various combinations of over achieving, perfectionism, over compensation, feeling like an outsider and self criticism come up time and time again - particularly when I speak with women. Women who have masked and managed their whole lives by organising their worlds to the nth degree yet still feel like the wheels are about to perpetually fall off and chaos will ensue !

“They think you’re doing fine because you’ve gotten too good at pretending you are.”
There’s a version of ADHD no one talks about enough.
The kind that doesn’t look chaotic on the outside.
The kind that hides behind organization, overachievement, and constant smiles.
The kind that looks “put together” but feels like drowning quietly.
That’s high-masking ADHD.
It’s the version where you spend every ounce of your energy trying to appear “normal.”
Where every interaction feels like a performance.
Where you smile, nod, and over-apologize not because you’re fine, but because you’re afraid of being misunderstood.
It looks like:
Keeping a spotless home so no one can accuse you of being lazy.
Mirroring others’ behavior so you don’t stand out or say the “wrong” thing.
Taking detailed notes because your brain forgets what it swears it will remember.
Appearing calm even when your mind is screaming.
Overcommitting to prove you’re reliable, even when you’re burnt out.
Trying to be perfect to compensate for the parts of your brain you’ve been told are “too much.”
Apologizing for things that aren’t even your fault.
Downplaying your struggles because you don’t want to be a burden.
Feeling like you’re constantly performing instead of just existing.
And maybe the worst part?
People don’t see it.
Because you’ve learned how to hide it too well.
They see the effort not the exhaustion behind it.
They see the notes, the structure, the success — not the mental gymnastics it takes to keep up.
They see the smiles not the sensory overwhelm that hits the moment you’re alone.
You’ve spent years learning how to mask your ADHD so you could fit into a world that was never designed for your brain.
And it worked.
But it also cost you peace.
Because masking doesn’t mean managing.
It means performing survival.
You’ve taught yourself to over-prepare, over-apologize, and overachieve — just to feel “enough.”
You’ve built an image of capability to avoid judgment, and now you’re trapped inside it.
People call you “responsible,” “organized,” “driven” — not realizing you’re running on anxiety and caffeine and the fear of being seen as unreliable.
But here’s the truth:
You shouldn’t have to earn acceptance by hiding who you are.
You shouldn’t have to prove your worth by overcompensating for your wiring.
You shouldn’t have to mask your chaos just to be loved.
Because ADHD masking isn’t just exhausting it’s isolating.
It disconnects you from the people who might actually get it if you let them see the real you.
And here’s the twist masking doesn’t make you stronger. Vulnerability does.
The moment you stop hiding and start speaking openly about your struggles, you give others permission to do the same.
It’s okay to have bad days.
It’s okay to need help.
It’s okay if your house isn’t perfect, your planner is chaos, and your brain doesn’t follow the rules.
You are not your productivity.
You are not your performance.
You are not your mask.
You are a human being doing your best in a world that was never designed with you in mind.
And you deserve to exist as you are unfiltered, unmasked, and unashamed.
Because the moment you stop performing and start being, that’s when you finally find peace.

23/04/2026

This provides a nice visual of various strategies for helping with different types of overwhelm I thought ….

Sick and tired of therapies that don't tailor therapy to your specific needs. Email earth and water therapy who offer therapy for working adults who are diagnosed or suspect they
may have Autism or Adhd or a combination of both. Here's a free summary tool of techniques to help you cope.

Email: [email protected]

20/04/2026

Some lovely feedback this morning 🥰😊…

“I would highly recommend Petch Psychology. Vikky was knowledgeable, friendly and nothing was too much trouble. She was brilliant with my son on the day of the assessment and made him feel completely at ease. The report was very thorough and turned around quickly, and we found it incredibly helpful.”

20/03/2026

11/03/2026

🥰🥰 Feeling warm and fuzzy after being recommended so many times recently. It really does mean a lot to know I have such satisfied clients. As both a professional and a parent I feel very invested in getting ADHD / ASC assessments right. To me the journey and experience are as important as the outcome (this really shouldn’t be a tick box exercise) so I love hearing I have done a good job. A big thanks for allowing me to be part of your / your child’s journey and for supporting local business 🥰🥰

23/02/2026

BBC summary of the SEND reforms announced today….

The government says it will spend £4bn in mainstream schools in England over three years, as the Conservatives question where the money will come from.