Novena-Chanel Davies

28/09/2026

I recently went to watch Table 17 at the Kiln Theatre, & somewhere between the laughter, the audience shouting at the stage, & me mentally putting my therapist hat on when nobody asked me to 😂, I found myself thinking about something I see repeatedly in relationships:

What happens when two people are both investing in a relationship, but investing in completely different parts of it?

Table 17 brings former fiancés Jada & Dallas back together over dinner, years after their relationship ended. I’m not quite sure I would have gone 😅, but hey, when feelings are still present, endings are unresolved, or ruptures result in unexpected ends, many wish these talks were possible.

Without giving too much away, one of the central ruptures in their relationship involved infidelity.

Jada had felt increasingly emotionally neglected. Dallas was working relentlessly towards what he believed was their future, building security, stability & the life they had talked about.

From his perspective: “I was doing this for us.”. From hers: “But where were you while you were doing it?” THAT interested me.

Sometimes one person is busy building the future of the relationship, while the other is becoming increasingly lonely inside its present vacantness.

I’ve spoken about this dynamic many times in my therapeutic work. For some people, love & commitment are deeply connected to provision. Getting their career established, buying the house, becoming financially secure - creating something tangible that says, I can take care of us. We see it often with men who society has told their worth is through provision, not necessarily emotional support, presence & attachment.

There is nothing inherently wrong with wanting to provide, create security, & feel stable in what has been built. The difficulty comes when “I’m doing this for us”, quietly becomes, “So you shouldn’t need anything from me while I’m doing it.” Relationships require maintenance while we are building them.

You can be providing financially & still leave somebody physically, mentally, or even emotionally lonely. Beautiful intentions are just intentions if the outcome is not experienced.

Check comments below for tips👇🏾

07/09/2026

We are finally getting to see true placement and magnitude of Africa - the continent which provides resources throughout the world, yet, is still incorrectly labelled ‘the third world’.

This week, the United Nations General Assembly overwhelmingly backed a resolution encouraging the use of world maps that more accurately represent the true relative size of Africa and other landmasses.

The vote was 164 in favour, 1 against, with 6 abstentions.

For centuries, many of us have grown up looking at the Mercator projection, a map created in the 1500s for navigation, which significantly enlarges landmasses nearer the poles and makes equatorial regions appear comparatively smaller. Africa is approximately 14 times the size of Greenland, despite the familiar Mercator map making them appear surprisingly comparable.

For some, this may simply sound like geography. However, as a therapist, lecturer and author who writes about intergenerational trauma, I believe it is also psychology.

In my book, IERA-Therapy®: A Framework for Understanding Intergenerational Trauma in the Black and Brown Diaspora, I discuss structural embedding, including the historical shrinking of Africa on Eurocentric maps.

It may seem strange to place this within a therapy book, however, representation becomes absorbed into our sense of self, worth, trajectory, and positioning within systems and the world.

In fact, maps, language, education, beauty standards, political narratives, media representation and classifications such as “minority”, “developing” and “third world” do more than describe a world. They can teach us where we are positioned within it.

When the same communities are repeatedly represented as smaller, poorer, peripheral, dependent, dangerous or somehow requiring the leadership of somebody else, those messages can become part of our collective meaning-making.

This is why culturally informed therapy cannot simply ask, “What happened to you?” Sometimes we also need to ask:
What happened around you? What happened before you?
What were you repeatedly taught about people who look like you? What did you have to assimilate into to remain safe?
And much more.

May this be the start.

03/09/2026

02/09/2026

New academic year, same reminder: access matters.

As students return to schools, colleges and universities, this feels like an important reminder.

A student struggling does not necessarily mean a student who is incapable, unmotivated, disengaged or “not trying hard enough”. Sometimes, the environment is creating or merely amplifying their struggle.

ADHD, autism, dyslexia, anxiety and other non-visible disabilities can affect executive functioning, processing, concentration, communication, sensory regulation, organisation and the ability to demonstrate knowledge in the ways education traditionally expects.

Reasonable adjustments are not about giving someone an unfair advantage; they work to remove the unnecessary barriers to learning that most have had to endure for too long. For some, completely destroying their association with education, learning, and academic success.

So, this academic year, here are a few things we can all do differently:

Lecturers & educators: Be explicit. Give clear written instructions alongside verbal ones. Break larger tasks into manageable stages. Avoid assuming that missed deadlines, lateness, silence or difficulty initiating work automatically mean a lack of commitment. Ask, “What might help you access this?” rather than, “Why haven’t you done this?”

Students: Learn what helps your brain learn. Ask what reasonable adjustments are available and use the adjustments that are available to you. Ask for clarification when instructions are ambiguous. Use assistive technology, reminders, visual planning, body doubling and academic support where helpful. You do not have to wait until you are drowning before asking for support.

Parents & carers: Look beyond behaviour. Procrastination, avoidance, emotional overwhelm, shutdown and apparent disorganisation can sometimes tell us that the demands being placed upon a young person exceed their current capacity or available support. Curiosity will often tell us more than criticism.

More below in the comments section 👇🏾

02/09/2026

New academic year, same reminder: access matters.

As students return to schools, colleges and universities, this feels like an important reminder.

A student struggling does not necessarily mean a student who is incapable, unmotivated, disengaged or “not trying hard enough”. Sometimes, the environment is creating or merely amplifying their struggle.

ADHD, autism, dyslexia, anxiety and other non-visible disabilities can affect executive functioning, processing, concentration, communication, sensory regulation, organisation and the ability to demonstrate knowledge in the ways education traditionally expects.

Reasonable adjustments are not about giving someone an unfair advantage; they work to remove the unnecessary barriers to learning that most have had to endure for too long. For some, completely destroying their association with education, learning, and academic success.

So, this academic year, here are a few things we can all do
differently:

Lecturers & educators: Be explicit. Give clear written instructions alongside verbal ones. Break larger tasks into manageable stages. Avoid assuming that missed deadlines, lateness, silence or difficulty initiating work automatically mean a lack of commitment. Ask, “What might help you access this?” rather than, “Why haven’t you done this?”

Students: Learn what helps your brain learn. Ask what reasonable adjustments are available and use adjustments available to you. Ask for clarification when instructions are ambiguous. Use assistive technology, reminders, visual planning, body doubling (working alongside someone else) and academic support where helpful. You do not have to wait until you are drowning before asking for support.

Parents & carers: Look beyond behaviour. Procrastination, avoidance, emotional overwhelm, shutdown and apparent disorganisation can sometimes tell us that the demands being placed upon a young person exceed their current capacity or available support. Curiosity will often tell us more than criticism.

More below 👇🏾

15/08/2026

The news of Professor Jason Arday’s death is devastating.

Whatever our individual opinions may be about the allegations surrounding him, I would urge you to think about what happens when unapologetic public scrutiny becomes a spectacle. There were relentless unverified accounts sourced, character assassination, punishment, and social media became a court room without the balance of actual evidence and defence.

Some matters did warrant proper investigation, as questions about academic integrity absolutely deserve to be examined. However, too many had decided guilt before even the completion of a proper investigation, overlooking previous investigations, and to be blunt, the power dynamics and possibly motivations of those who seemed to tear him down. It became a public pile-on.

So many who have never written a doctoral paper suddenly became academics who understood referencing and citations. Too many with little understanding of neurodivergence became specialists, or, for some, without knowledge of the impact of things such as dyslexia or autism, dismissive.

Neurodivergence does not remove responsibility or mean that someone cannot be held accountable. However, we should be capable of holding two thoughts at once: people can be accountable for their actions, while also being psychologically vulnerable to sustained public humiliation, harassment and social rejection.

He resigned. Still, for some people, that wasn’t enough. That is the part I believe we need to sit with.
What exactly are we asking for when somebody has lost their position, their reputation is being publicly dismantled, investigations are under way, and thousands of strangers continue demanding more?
At what point does accountability become punishment?

As a therapist, I think often about the psychological consequences of shame. Public shame is particularly powerful because there is seemingly nowhere to escape it. Your name becomes searchable, strangers discuss your character, and people who have never met you become convinced that they know who you are.

Whatever may have been established through appropriate investigation, Professor Arday was entitled to due process, dignity and humanit

15/08/2026

The news of Professor Jason Arday’s death is devastating, and becoming too familiar.

Whatever our individual opinions may be about the allegations surrounding him, we are asked to truly think about what happens when unapologetic public scrutiny becomes a spectacle, with relentless unverified accounts sourced, character assassination, and punishment, with social media becoming a court room without rules of evidence.

Over recent weeks, allegations, commentary, speculation and claims about Jason Arday travelled rapidly across traditional and social media. Some matters warranted proper investigation. Questions about academic integrity absolutely deserve to be examined. However, too many had decided guilt before even the completion of a proper investigation. An investigation and accountability are not the same thing as a public pile-on.

So many who have never written a doctoral paper suddenly became academics who understood referencing and citations. Too many with little understanding of neurodivergence became specialists, or, without knowledge, unkind and dismissive.

Neurodivergence does not remove responsibility or mean that someone cannot be held accountable. However, we should be capable of holding two thoughts at once: people can be accountable for their actions, while also being psychologically vulnerable to sustained public humiliation, harassment and social rejection.

He resigned. Still, for some people, that wasn’t enough. That is the part I believe we need to sit with.

What exactly are we asking for when somebody has lost their position, their reputation is being publicly dismantled, investigations are under way, and thousands of strangers continue demanding more?
At what point does accountability become punishment?

As a therapist, I think often about the psychological consequences of shame. Public shame is particularly powerful because there is seemingly nowhere to escape it. Your name becomes searchable, strangers discuss your character, and people who have never met you become convinced that they know who you are.

Whatever may have been discovered, Jason deserved humanity and respect.