09/06/2026
Lessons from My Mother
Today would have been my mother Patty’s 96th birthday.
She died 21 years ago, yet I still carry her with me every day. Around this time each year, I find myself reflecting on the extraordinary lessons she taught me, not just through words, but through the way she lived.
She was my first coach.
When my father died, she suddenly found herself raising eight children and managing two businesses she knew little about. She didn’t have all the answers, but she trusted she could learn. She taught me that courage isn’t knowing how, it’s believing you’ll figure it out.
She showed me that joy is essential, even in grief. She sang, danced, wrote poetry and embraced creativity when life was hardest. Play, she taught me, isn’t frivolous, it is healing. I can still hear her laugh and see her throw her head back and her eyes crinkle with fun!
Kindness was simply how she lived. Our door was always open to those in need, often with no one else ever knowing. She taught me that the quietest acts of generosity are often the most powerful.
She expected me to work hard, be curious and learn to do things for myself. Those everyday chores became lessons in confidence and resourcefulness that have stayed with me for life.
She valued honesty, lifelong learning and community. And when life became difficult, she kept putting one foot in front of the other, surrounded by people who lifted her up.
As I reflect today, I realise these values have become woven into my own life and my work as a coach. They underpin my belief in resilience, in human potential and in the goodness of others.
The greatest lessons we receive are rarely spoken. They are absorbed by watching those who raise us and shape the way we respond to life.
Perhaps that is the greatest legacy anyone can leave.
Who was your first coach, and what did they teach you without ever saying a word?
Thank you, Mam. For everything.
And thank you to Carolan, whose inspiration prompted me to finally write this reflection.
