Sylwia Kuchenna

05/08/2026

Some words comfort you. Others change you.

These 10 life mottos aren't meant to make you feel better—they're meant to make you think. Sometimes the greatest transformation begins with a single uncomfortable truth.

If even one of these sentences challenges the way you think, don't scroll past it. Sit with it. Reflect on it. Then take one action today that your future self will thank you for.

Growth doesn't happen when life gets easier. It happens when you stop making excuses and start making choices.

Which one hit you the hardest? Let me know in the comments.

03/08/2026

25/07/2026

How most people see others at the gym…

"She's overweight."
"He's too skinny."
"He's obsessed with muscles."
"She has the perfect body."
"He clearly doesn't train hard enough."

We see bodies.
We compare.
We judge.

How a psychodynamic psychotherapist might see the same gym…

I don't just see bodies.

I wonder about the story each body has been carrying for years.

The man who spent years trying to become strong enough so no one could hurt him again.

The woman who pushes herself to perfection because, somewhere deep inside, she believes she's only worthy when she achieves.

The person who hides in oversized clothes, hoping no one will notice them.

The one who has built a body that protects them from feeling vulnerable.

The woman who pushes herself to exhaustion—does she believe she has to earn love through perfection?

The man who has built an impressive physique—has strength become the only place where he feels safe?

The person who avoids eye contact and stays in the corner—how many times have they felt rejected?

The one who constantly seeks reassurance from others—what does abandonment still whisper to them?

The person whose body seems to protect them with extra weight—what pain has that body been trying to hold?

As a psychodynamic psychotherapist, I know that our bodies often carry what our words never could.

Our bodies are not simply the result of genetics, discipline or motivation.

Sometimes they become our biography.
A silent language.
A way of adapting to experiences we couldn't put into words.

The gym is not just full of people exercising.

It is full of nervous systems.
Attachment histories.
Defence mechanisms.
Unspoken grief.
And extraordinary attempts to survive.

So next time you look around a gym, remember:

You never know what story a body is trying to tell.

Inspired by psychodynamic thinking and the understanding that our emotional lives can shape the way we inhabit our bodies. This is not a diagnostic statement, but an invitation to look beyond appearances with curiosity rather than judgment.

24/07/2026

The Father Wound Doesn't End in Childhood. It Shapes the Way You Love.

The father wound is not simply about growing up without a father.

It can develop when a father was physically present but emotionally unavailable, unpredictable, critical, rejecting, controlling, or impossible to reach.

As children, we adapt to survive.

As adults, those adaptations often become our relationship patterns.

You may find yourself:
• Chasing emotionally unavailable partners.
• Falling in love with someone's potential instead of who they are.
• Feeling anxious when someone pulls away.
• Believing you have to earn love by being "good enough."
• Ignoring red flags because you're afraid of being abandoned.
• Confusing intensity with intimacy.
• Feeling uncomfortable when someone offers you consistent, healthy love.

The tragedy of the father wound is that it convinces you your deepest pain is your normal.

But healing changes everything.

You stop trying to rescue people who don't want to change.
You stop begging for crumbs of affection.
You stop proving your worth.

Instead, you begin to believe that love is not something you earn.

It is something you are worthy of simply because you exist.

Healing is about breaking the cycle so you no longer expect others to love you the way you were once wounded.

With love,
Sylwia 🤍

21/07/2026

"Psychologists are lying!"

How many times have you heard someone say:

"I had a wonderful childhood."

Yet in the same conversation they say:

"I love my mother, but I don't want to become like her."

"I love my father, but I don't want a husband like him."

"I loved my childhood, but I don't want my children to grow up the way I did."

Can you see the contradiction?

Loving your parents and acknowledging the pain they caused are not mutually exclusive. You don't have to hate your family to recognize that some parts of your upbringing were unhealthy.

Many people confuse familiarity with safety.

We idealize our childhood because children depend on their caregivers for survival. Seeing our parents as "good enough" is often less frightening than facing the reality that our emotional needs may not have been met.

Healing isn't about blaming your parents.

It's about having the courage to say:

"They did the best they could with what they knew... and it still affected me."

That sentence changes everything.

Because the moment you stop protecting the past, you finally start protecting your future.

The goal of therapy isn't to convince you that your parents were bad people.

It's to help you understand why you think, feel, react, love, fear, and choose the way you do—so you can consciously decide what you want to carry forward and what you want to leave behind.

You can love your parents deeply...
..and still choose a different life.

That isn't betrayal.

That's healing.

19/07/2026

🌿 Which Path Would You Choose?

Imagine you're standing at a crossroads with six different paths in front of you.

Don't overthink it. Simply choose the one that attracts you first. Your first instinct is often the most revealing.

Our minds are naturally drawn to certain images based on our current emotions, needs, values, and life experiences. While this isn't a scientifically validated psychological test, it can be a meaningful exercise in self-reflection.

1️⃣ River & Bridge 🌊

You're seeking stability, security, and peace of mind. Right now, your mind is craving a solid foundation, predictable progress, and a life that feels calm rather than chaotic.

2️⃣ Open Meadow 🌼

You're ready for growth, new opportunities, and fresh beginnings. Your mind is encouraging you to think bigger, embrace change, and step into possibilities you may have been afraid to pursue.

3️⃣ Forest 🌲

You're being called toward courage and self-confidence. Deep down, you know your greatest opportunities lie beyond your comfort zone, and it's time to trust yourself more.

4️⃣ Garden & Fountain ⛲

Your mind is asking for balance, clarity, and smarter ways of working. You don't need to work harder—you need better systems, healthier boundaries, and more space to enjoy the life you're building.

5️⃣ Mountains 🏔️

You're driven by purpose, ambition, and achievement. You want to create something meaningful and lasting. Right now, discipline, consistency, and resilience will help you reach your next level.

6️⃣ Village 🏡

You're craving connection, belonging, and meaningful relationships. You understand that true success is built through trust, community, and surrounding yourself with people who share your values.

✨ There are no right or wrong answers. Your choice doesn't define you—it simply offers an opportunity to reflect on what you may need most in this chapter of your life.

👇 Comment the number of the path you chose (1–6), and tell me what drew you to it.

This is a reflective psychological exercise designed to encourage self-awareness and conversation. It is intended for insight and entertainment and is not a scientifically vali

12/07/2026

Poznajmy się

Wierzę, że za każdym objawem kryje się historia, która zasługuje na zrozumienie – nie ocenę. Dlatego w swojej pracy nie skupiam się wyłącznie na łagodzeniu objawów, ale przede wszystkim na odkrywaniu ich źródła.

Nazywam się Sylwia Kuchenna i jestem psychoterapeutką, traumatolożką, wykładowczynią oraz autorką trzech książek. Od ponad 9 lat wspieram młodzież i dorosłych w wychodzeniu z lęku, traumy, trudnych relacji oraz kryzysów życiowych.

Pracuję w nurcie psychodynamicznym, który pozwala zrozumieć, w jaki sposób nasze doświadczenia z przeszłości wpływają na obecne emocje, relacje i sposób postrzegania siebie. Wierzę, że trwała zmiana zaczyna się od poznania siebie i zrozumienia własnej historii.

Prowadzę indywidualne sesje psychoterapii (1:1) dla dorosłych oraz młodzieży od 14. roku życia, zarówno stacjonarnie w Limerick, jak i online, dzięki czemu mogę wspierać osoby mieszkające w różnych częściach świata. Sesje odbywają się w języku polskim i angielskim.

Poza pracą z pacjentami jestem wykładowczynią w jednej z czołowych szkół psychoterapii w Irlandii, gdzie szkolę przyszłych psychoterapeutów. Jestem również autorką trzech książek, twórczynią kanału YouTube, na którym dzielę się wiedzą z zakresu zdrowia psychicznego, traumy i relacji, a także wielokrotnie gościłam jako ekspert w programach radiowych, popularyzując wiedzę o psychoterapii i zdrowiu psychicznym.

Jeżeli szukasz miejsca, w którym zostaniesz wysłuchana lub wysłuchany bez oceniania, z empatią i profesjonalnym wsparciem – zapraszam do kontaktu.

📍 Limerick, Ireland
👥 Sesje stacjonarne i online
🌍 Język polski i angielski
📞 00353 87 342 6977
✉️ [email protected]
🌐 www.psychotherapykuchenna.com

10/07/2026

5 Things That Feel Like Self-Awareness... But Aren't

Not everything that looks like healing is actually healing.

Sometimes what we call "self-awareness" is simply another survival strategy dressed up in psychological language.

1. Overanalysing everything you do.
Thinking about every conversation, every mistake, and every reaction isn't always insight. Sometimes it's hypervigilance—the nervous system trying to prevent rejection or criticism.

2. Constantly blaming yourself.
Taking responsibility is healthy. Believing everything is your fault is not. Excessive self-blame often grows from childhood environments where you had to carry emotions that never belonged to you.

3. Knowing your trauma—but never feeling it.
You can explain your childhood in great detail and still remain emotionally disconnected from it. Intellectual understanding is not the same as emotional processing.

4. Calling every emotion a "trigger."
Not every uncomfortable feeling is a trauma trigger. Sometimes it's disappointment, grief, frustration, or a healthy emotional response. Healing also means learning to tolerate normal emotional discomfort.

5. Watching therapy content instead of doing the deeper work.
Learning about psychology can be empowering, but insight alone rarely creates lasting change. Real healing happens when unconscious patterns are experienced, explored, and worked through in a safe therapeutic relationship.

Self-awareness isn't about knowing more about yourself.

It's about becoming more honest with yourself.

It's about noticing the patterns you repeat, understanding where they came from, and gradually creating the safety to respond differently.

Healing begins when insight is followed by experience—not just information.

✨ Which one surprised you the most?