18/09/2026
Parents today remove every obstacle from their children’s path — and then wonder why they struggle with frustration.
We don’t want things to be difficult for them.
We don’t want them to be sad.
We don’t want them to lose.
We don’t want them to wait.
We don’t want them to feel disappointed.
So we step in.
They can’t open it? We open it.
They don’t know how? We show them.
They’re taking too long to get dressed? We dress them.
They have an argument with a friend? We solve it.
They forget something for school? We bring it to them.
They’re bored? We quickly find something to entertain them.
They lose a game? Sometimes we even let them win. 😅
All out of love. ❤️
But there is one small problem.
Children don’t learn to tolerate frustration through explanations. They learn to tolerate frustration by experiencing it.
A child sometimes needs to try and not succeed.
They need to wait.
They need to hear “no”.
They need to lose a game and discover that the world is still perfectly fine.
They need to struggle with that stubborn zip that just won’t go up.
They need to try again.
Because in those small, everyday moments, they are building something much bigger:
Self-regulation.
Patience.
Persistence.
Flexibility.
Confidence that doesn’t come simply from hearing “You can do it,” but from experiencing:
“That was hard. I didn’t give up. And I did it.”
Of course, this doesn’t mean leaving a child alone with something they are developmentally unable to manage.
But there is a huge difference between supporting a child while they do something and doing it for them.
Our job isn’t to clear every stone from the road ahead so that our children never encounter an obstacle.
Our job is to walk close enough that they know we are there — while allowing them to learn how to get over that stone themselves. ❤️
Because one day, the obstacles won’t be a difficult zip, losing a board game, or having to wait five minutes.
They’ll be school.
Rejection.
Failure.
Work.
Relationships.
Life.
And we won’t always be able to step in.
Perhaps one of the greatest things we can give a child isn’t a life without frustration — but the experience, while they are still young, of discovering that they can tolerate frustration, work through it, and keep going.
And perhaps after:
“I can’t do it!”
we only need to add one small word:
“…yet.” ❤️
Kristina Rautek Potočnik
Early Intervention Specialist
