23/05/2026
Candid conversations...
One of the best part of being a teacher to young surgeons is that not just they but I get to learn a lot from them too!!!
Today while suturing one of my resident with two other residents in attendance, we were talking about some general things when they suddenly asked, "What kind of men do you like, ma'am?" The reason behind the question being that many of them are looking for life partners and they wanted to learn from my experiences.
I said, "Someone with high EQ and high IQ who is a kind, compassionate and generous with whom I could have deep conversations, remembers to get me flowers, writes me poetry & has the capacity to understand my poetry, can make us a meal, knows that he needs to make me walk on the side of pavement and opens the doors wherever we go consistenly even after years of knowing me coming genuinely from a place of love. He should have his own life goals and be supportive in mine and be secure enough to not be threatened by my growth. And of course, he should earn atleast as much as I do!
There were giggles and laughter and my students asked me, "Isn't this too much, ma'am!?" And I smiled and said, "No! This is the bare minimum!! When I can do all this for myself, he should be able to do this much atleast for us!"
The boys exclaimed, "Ma'am you belong to a different generation. Girls these days don't like flowers or poetry. They are just looking for someone to elevate their lifestyle! They don't care about the rest!" Girls had a different opinion. They felt that boys were bothered more about their style or beauty and if they cared too much, the boys stopped caring altogether. They also felt lack of effort and a sense of competition from many of the men they met.
I don't know the trend in this generation but I do advice my girls to keep up their standards by themselves until they meet the right man and my boys to see the standards of the woman they like as an opportunity to grow as a person and not as a reason to give up!
