11/08/2026
FCK IT, I’m just going to say 2 things.
1. Boundary setting is about making sure you can sleep at night with your own decisions.
2. You’re scared about having the hard conversation outside of any specific triggers because you have been accused of being sensitive, dramatic, or causing problems.
You’re thinking: Why bring additional suffering to my own door? It will come sooner or later anyway. Why make it happen sooner?
I think about it as performance managing someone at work. You need to give someone fair warning that you do not have a flexible starting time in your company before you can slam them for it. We both know they already know, but you need the paper trail.
You already know how this conversation is gonna go, but this is your paper trail that you have done everything in your power to make it clear. They can no longer claim ignorance. “But I didn’t know you felt this way” won’t fly.
It is unlikely that they will change the patterns, but this is your chance at making sure you have done everything in your power to increase your odds of being able to sleep at night.
