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Would you like to get over your emotional suffering? Do you have little time to spend on yourself? I

21/10/2026

I think this is particularly relevant for those of us who are:
🔸 capable
🔸 dependable
🔸+ used to getting things done

We tend to notice what needs doing, often before anyone else does. If there’s a problem, we sort it. If someone needs help, we step in. If something needs organising, we’re often the person who says, 'Leave it with me.'

There’s nothing inherently wrong with that. Being reliable and willing to help can be a real strength 💛

But I wonder if there’s a point where being capable quietly turns into feeling responsible for everything.

So lately I’ve been thinking about a very simple question:

👉 Is this actually mine to carry?

What about you? Is there something you’ve taken responsibility for simply because you know you can do it?

🧡

20/10/2026

Thanks ignite for sending me this great book

19/10/2026

When you’re used to being the person who gets things done, it can be surprisingly difficult to stop stepping in 🧡

You take on the extra piece of work because you know you can get it done.
You organise things at home because it feels easier than waiting for someone else.
You solve problems that perhaps weren’t yours to solve in the first place.

Individually, none of these things seems particularly significant. But added together, they create a mental load that can become surprisingly heavy.

👉 And this is something I see when people are moving towards burnout.

It isn’t always one enormous pressure that gets them there. Often, it’s the accumulation of many smaller things.

Eventually, there’s very little space left for themselves.

So, this week, take a moment to notice what you’re carrying.

➡️ What is genuinely yours, and what have you picked up simply because you were capable of carrying it?

There might just be something you can put down 💛

12/10/2026

𝗞𝗮𝘁𝗵𝘆, 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝘄𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝗲 𝗶𝗻 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗴𝗲.

That was one of my lessons from several weeks of travelling (pics attached 🥰).

Not just about being present, embracing new experiences or stepping outside my comfort zone 💚

It was also about learning that I don’t always have to organise everything, make every decision or make sure everything happens exactly as I think it should.

I’m someone who likes a plan. I’m comfortable making decisions, and if something needs organising, I’m usually happy to step up.

Those qualities have served me well throughout my life and career.

👉 But perhaps there’s a fine line between being capable and taking over.

Sometimes stepping back means tolerating a little uncertainty and trusting someone else to work it out.

Even if they don’t do it exactly the way we would 😉

I’m still working on that one - and I suspect I will be for some time yet!

➡️ Where in your life are you carrying responsibility that could belong to someone else?

10/10/2026

Such a pleasure to present to a small group of rural women in Taupo on Thursday for my friends Stan and Angela Sickler who are rural agents for Colliers Rural in Taupo. I spoke about change and being able to work with this as we get older. I used some pillars to help these women to prioritise themselves when for most of their lives they haven’t. These were 🧡restore, 🧡protect, 🧡connect.

08/10/2026

Apparently, I’m bossy… 😂

There’s nothing quite like a holiday with friends and family to teach you a little more about yourself.

During our recent travels, I somehow became the chief organiser.

🔸 Where are we going?
🔸 What time do we need to leave?
🔸 Have we booked it?
🔸 How are we getting there?
🔸 What’s the plan tomorrow?

I was onto it.

And then came the comment: "You’re bossy.”

Once I got over the slight indignation, it did get me thinking.

When does being organised and taking the lead tip over into needing to be in control?

I talk to clients about control an awful lot, and I think there can be a fine line between leading and taking over.

Leadership says: “I’m happy to take the lead.”

Control says: “I need this to happen my way.”

Maybe the answer isn’t to stop being organised, capable or decisive.

Perhaps it’s simply becoming more aware of when we’re choosing to lead and when we’re automatically taking over 🧡

Sometimes leadership means stepping forward and saying, “I’ve got this.”

And sometimes it means stepping back, tolerating a little uncertainty and trusting someone else to work it out - even if they don’t do it exactly the way we would.

That last bit might be the hardest 😉

👉 Where do you think you sit on that line?

04/10/2026

“It’s just easier if I do it myself.”

Sound familiar?

I think it’s an easy pattern to fall into, particularly if you’re capable and used to being the person who gets things done 🩷

You organise.
You anticipate what’s needed.
You solve the problem.
You make the decision.

And because you’re good at it, people naturally start to rely on you.

Before you know it, you’re not only carrying your own responsibilities, but quite a few other people’s as well.

And that can be exhausting 💚

It’s not always the big things that drain our capacity. Sometimes it’s the constant mental load of thinking ahead, remembering, planning, anticipating and making sure everything happens.

I see this so often with busy mums and capable women.

Perhaps the answer isn’t to stop being capable.

Maybe it’s to ask:

👉 What am I carrying that could belong to someone else?

Is there something you could hand over, step back from or simply allow someone else to do their way?

It might just free up a little more capacity for you 🧡

30/09/2026

"Choose to be optimistic. It feels better."
- 𝘋𝘢𝘭𝘢𝘪 𝘓𝘢𝘮𝘢

This month, the action for happiness theme is 'Optimistic October', which is all about actions to help you focus on what really matters 🧡

Kick off the month by writing down three things you can look forward to this month.

I'll start 👇

Warmer weather! We've had a few lovely spring days, and I cannot wait for more of them ☀️

Keep an eye on my posts and stories this month for ways you can have an Optimistic October.

28/09/2026

𝗪𝗲 𝗼𝗳𝘁𝗲𝗻 𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗮𝗯𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝘁𝗼 𝗰𝗼𝗽𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲 🧡

Before we begin something unfamiliar, our minds are incredibly good at imagining everything that could go wrong.

We convince ourselves we won't know what to do.

That we'll feel uncomfortable.

That we're not ready.

Yet time and time again, life shows us something different.

We learn.
We adjust.
We become more confident.
What once felt overwhelming gradually becomes normal.

Sometimes we simply need to take the first step, trust ourselves, and discover that we were capable all along 💚

👉 What's one small step you could take this week?

25/09/2026

If you’re moving into Q4 exhausted, stretched thin, or feeling like you lost yourself somewhere along the way, you’re exactly who my free webinar is for 🧡

Join me for: High-Functioning Burnout: When you’re coping on the outside but exhausted on the inside.

Monday 28 September
12.00 - 1.00 pm NZT
Online on Zoom

We’ll cover:
🔸 The hallmark signs of high-functioning burnout
🔸 Why pushing through makes symptoms worse
🔸 How your nervous system reacts to prolonged stress
🔸 What genuine recovery looks like
🔸 The small sustainable steps that actually help

This session is ideal for:
🔸 Nurses
🔸 Teachers
🔸 Caregivers
🔸 Helpers
🔸 Leaders
🔸 Or anyone who gives more than they receive

To register, head to the events page - free to attend, you just need a complimentary ticket.

Kathy 💛

PS - If you've got friends, family or colleagues who would benefit, please feel free to forward this to them.

Address

39 Whyte Street
Hamilton
3216

Website

https://www.kathyshawcoaching.co.nz/

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