12/05/2026
As a psychotherapist, one of the important distinctions I am reminded of is this: description is not explanation.
Naming a behavior is not the same as understanding it.
This is something Gabor Mate speaks about often:
we are quickly to label behaviours, but slow to ask what suffering they emerged from.
We can describe addiction, anxiety, avoidance, perfectionism, people-pleasing, but the deeper human question is:
What function does it serve? What pain was so unbearable that this behaviour became necessary?
Many behaviours that look irrational from the outside make profound sense once their emotional context is understood.
Understanding does not remove responsibility but it transforms judgement into curiosity and curiosity is often where healing begins.
