Cassiana Rusu - Psihoterapeut

Cassiana Rusu - Psihoterapeut Psihoterapie sistemica de cuplu si familie

29/05/2026

Dr. Tracey Marks is a board-certified psychiatrist. In today's episode of The Tamsen Show, she sits down with Tamsen Fadal to talk about ADHD in women: why i...

07/04/2026

Many childhood trauma survivors wonder if they willfully attract abusive people into their lives.⁠
⁠
While it can look like that from the outside, I don't⁠
believe we look at someone and say, "Yes...let's⁠
welcome this abusive person into our lives so they⁠
can ruin it."⁠
⁠
It doesn't work like that.⁠
⁠
I think children who grow up in neglect and abuse⁠
are modeled that their safety doesn't matter. So many⁠
of us were left with perpetrators or exposed to them.⁠
⁠
Just like in childhood, we dissociate when someone says abuse is normal and ok. Unfortunately, this pattern repeats in our adulthood with difficult or abusive people. ⁠We are not focused on our safety because we most likely don't know how to do that.⁠
⁠
When parents do not:⁠
⁠
*Model healthy boundaries⁠
*Use good intuition about their child's safety⁠
*Choose a child's safety over a perpetrator's feelings⁠
the child grows up without the vital mechanism of self-preservation. ⁠
⁠
How can we know who is safe when the adults⁠
welcomed in danger?⁠ ⁠ We need help getting⁠
a radar system in place that should have been⁠
there all along. ⁠ ⁠
⁠
It's more like abusive people happen to us because⁠
we don't think we have rights around our happiness⁠
and safety.⁠
⁠
This issue is also mixed with dissociation, codependency in the form of not wanting to rock the boat, and magical thinking.

01/04/2026

This is the part those hand-wringing articles about estrangement seem to miss. The “trend” of estrangement is not about a lack of communication it’s about a lack of accountability.

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26/02/2026

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"What you find normal will find you… and what you cannot normalize, you cannot sustain.

You can want joy and still contract around it. You can want peace and still recreate chaos. You can want abundance and still feel safer in scarcity. That’s because our nervous system chooses before our mind does. So the real question becomes:

What have you normalized?

Have you normalized struggle? Have you normalized inconsistency? Have you normalized being the strong one? Have you normalized having to prove your worth? Have you normalized disappointment so thoroughly that it no longer surprises you?

Because whatever you have normalized is what will continue to feel familiar. And familiarity feels like destiny until you look closely. To paraphrase Jung: “Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.“

And this is where most people stop reading.

Because it’s easier to talk about vision boards than to examine what your body does when something good happens. It’s easier to say 'I want more & better' than it is to notice how quickly you shrink when more approaches. It’s easier to blame timing, luck, or the wrong people, than to ask whether your system has the capacity to receive what you say you desire."

—Jovanny Varela, excerpt from Gentle Reminder No 127: "What You Find Normal Will Find You - what happens when your body doesn't know how to say yes to the good things in life?"

The ability to receive is one of the major bottlenecks on the healing journey. If you know you're meant for more but your system still contracts when the more goodness shows up, I wrote this one for you ❤️🫂

Read the full piece: jovannyvarela.substack.com

Artwork by Iulia Bochis

22/02/2026

This video explains the neuroscience of attachment styles. Learn how your brain's "love blueprint" is formed and why you might be drawn to a "familiar storm"...

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