The Black Therapy Page

05/29/2026

Today’s Message:

🗣️Red Flags are not Traffic Lights, they do not turn yellow or green!!!

05/25/2026

Today’s Message:

An unhealed Gay Man and an unhealed Straight Man carry very very similar psychological and emotional frameworks. Similar distortions, core beliefs and maladaptive behaviors.

Both have difficulty with self regulation…

Both have difficulty building healthy relationships…

Both lack insight and self awareness…

Both are hyper-sexual. Often due to childhood sexual abuse…

Both live with Shame…so they project shame on others…

Both are angry, violent, passive aggressive and highly sensitive to criticism (even when it’s constructive)(no matter how nice its given)

Both facilitate connection with their bodies, bank accounts or social status..not with their personalities, vulnerability and intellect…

Both have insecurities connected to childhood trauma…so both use manipulation, love bombing and deceptive masking to hide their true identities and to facilitate connection…

Both lack accountability and self discipline…

Both have a victim narrative identity story….

Both lack self love so they can’t reciprocate love to others…

Both help create Broken Homes…

Both become baby fathers with baby mommas…

Both have negative impacts on the community…

Both do harm to the community…

Both are toxic to the community..

Both perpetuates stereotypes that are harmful to the community…

Why is this the case?

🗣️Because both are MEN and this is how unhealed Men, living in psychological pain, but unaware they are in psychological pain, behave!!!!

05/22/2026

Today’s Message:

🗣️Your wife is not your mother….

You can’t throw tantrums, lie, cheat and treat her any kind of way and expect her to still be home, tucking u in bed at night with a big smile and a warm snack….

That’s just not how adult relationships work my friend…

Eventually she will disconnect from you, disengage from you and divorce you.

05/20/2026

05/17/2026

Today’s Message:

If your father was inconsistent, gave broken promises, flaked on you, stood you up and gave a lot of apologies with no changed behavior; then the men you attract/date will have the type of characteristics that will require this of you as well!!

Sometimes we truly are attracted to the worst parts of our parents that are hidden within the good parts of people’s potential…

Ways to address this:

-Implement Boundaries

-Heal your inner child

-Love thy self more than you desire
to be loved by someone else

05/14/2026

Today’s Message:

One Sad Truth in our community is that if you’re a gay black man, some black men and women will let their white friends call you a “nigga” while they both simultaneously call you a “faggot”

But yet black gay men rally behind and with you, fighting your specific injustices, even while they know you are the primary cause of theirs…

One other sad truth is that a lot of black gay men support various
Black households…Stepping in and stepping up, sacrificing to fill the voids & gaps in the families lives and children’s lives that black str8 men deny, abandon, neglect or simply just don’t have the means to provide for…

All of this is done with no recognition, no appreciation and sometimes with lots of judgement, hate and shame…

It’s time to change that!!!

It’s time to stop demonizing black gay men!!

As without their light, protection and provision, some of our most vulnerable may never see sunshine through any of the seasons of life…

05/06/2026

Today’s Message:

Some of you will empty your pockets on a woman but won’t pay for a lawyer to legitimize your own kid…

Some of you will work 2-3 jobs & hours of overtime just to save the money to take care of your woman but won’t save up, work 2-3 jobs or overtime to fight for custody of your own kid…

If you know what it felt like to not have your dad in your life, why would you not try and do all you can to be in your own kids life?

If this is you, take some time and reflect and put the work in to do and be better…

Remember, your absence as a father, is sometimes more impactful to the child than the presence of a mother…

05/06/2026

Today’s Message:

When we use romantic love to aide in healing, we create a struggle love dynamic. There are 7 forms of love that we as humans can experience, only 6 of them are “needed” for healing. Romantic love is not “needed” to heal you or make you complete.

1. Eros (romantic)
2. Philia (friendship)
3. Storge (familial)
4. Agape (universal)
5. Ludus (playful)
6. Pragma (enduring)
7. Philautia (self-love)

You can get healing through the love from family, friends, community and etc because these forms of love doesn’t require your light as the power source of that healing just your presence.

Romantic love requires your light. Romantic love is for healed humans. Its not for humans looking to heal.

Love does no harm.

Seeking romantic or Eros love before finding and experiencing Philia (friendship love), Storge (family love), Agape (universal love), Philautia (self-love) will cause (psychological, emotional and sometimes physical) harm. Harm to the other person and harm to yourself.

That’s why the dating pool is what it is, too many unhealed humans swimming in it; looking to be loved instead of looking to give love. Looking for healing instead of looking for companionship..Looking for love to fill their emptiness vs looking for love to share their overflow…

05/02/2026

I don’t care what the flyer says, If they are not LICENSED they do not and cannot provide Therapy….

I don’t care how many degrees you see their name on, if they are not LICENSED they do not and cannot provide Therapy…

I don’t care how many Podcasts you see them on, if they are not LICENSED they do not and cannot provide Therapy…

I don’t care how many scriptures they quote or how many pulpits they stand on, if they are not LICENSED they do not and cannot provide Therapy…

The most impactful things WE deal with, within our community, requires Modalities of Therapy not Modalities of Sensationalized frameworks…

04/27/2026

Today’s Message:

Due to childhood trauma, Some people are subconsciously aroused by and attracted to aggressive behaviors, belief systems and energies.

That’s how some people end up with relationships that are sexually pleasurable but emotionally painful.

Relationships that are visually successful but psychologically unsafe.

That’s why it’s imperative that you heal from what has happened to you, so what has happened to you can stop choosing for you…