Manna Kansas City

09/07/2026

May that Alani hit your soul just right and your emails do find you well today and that both sides of your pillow remain cool tonight.

09/02/2026

I sit alone in a room with strangers while they tell me the things they’ve never told another living soul. They revisit their worst memories. Sometimes they cry. Then I send them home and summon the next one because their sorrow pays my bills.

08/30/2026

Shout-out to my Pops.

08/29/2026

08/29/2026

In what small ways do you delight in your partner? Often times, especially if you've been married or coupled for a long time, it can feel routine, stale or complacent. Partnership is work. Sometimes our brains need a bit of nudging to find new ways to appreciate our spouse or partner.

08/28/2026

08/25/2026

We lost America's favorite meemaw today.

08/22/2026

Internal Family Systems (IFS) is one of the most powerful modalities in the therapy space. I've seen all of these time and time again. Protector parts are powerful. We all have them and they all show up in individual ways.

MANAGERS
Managers are proactive protectors. They try to keep life under control so painful feelings don’t get triggered in the first place.
Examples:
• Perfectionism
• People-pleasing
• Overthinking and planning
• Being hyper-independent
• Staying constantly productive
• Controlling situations or relationships
• The inner critic: “If I criticize you first, maybe nobody else will.”

FIREFIGHTERS
Firefighters are reactive protectors. When emotional pain breaks through, they want it gone NOW. They’re less concerned about tomorrow than getting relief today.
Examples:
• Emotional eating
• Drinking or substance use
• Impulsive shopping
• Doom-scrolling or binge-watching
• Sleeping or shutting down
• Rage or explosive reactions
• Compulsive behaviors
• Anything that quickly numbs, distracts, escapes, or soothes

EXILES
Exiles are the vulnerable, wounded parts that carry emotions and beliefs from painful experiences. Managers and firefighters often work incredibly hard to keep these parts from being activated.
Exiles may carry:
• Shame: “Something is wrong with me.”
• Abandonment: “Everyone eventually leaves.”
• Fear: “I’m not safe.”
• Rejection: “Nobody really wants me.”
• Grief and loneliness
• Feelings of being unwanted, powerless, or unlovable