10/27/2026
I’ve always been the person who says, “Choose your hard, because life is hard either way.”
Being single vs. being in a relationship. Both are hard, just in very different ways.
Being single can be lonely. There’s no one to come home to after a long day, no one to share the little moments with, no one to plan adventures with or simply sit beside in comfortable silence. You miss the affection, the intimacy, the feeling of being wanted, appreciated, and loved. Of course, we can find happiness and fulfillment within ourselves, but there’s something special about having someone to share life with.
Being single can also be financially challenging. One income, one person carrying the responsibilities, one person figuring it all out. Sometimes it seems like life would be easier with someone beside you.
And then there’s being in a relationship…
The part nobody really prepares you for.
Because loving someone and building a life together isn’t always easy either.
It means blending two completely different lives, personalities, habits, experiences, and expectations. It means learning how to communicate when you’d rather shut down, compromising when you’d rather have your way, and being patient when patience is the last thing you have left.
It means having someone who sees ALL of you. 🤢( I’m a mess, ain’t nobody need to see that)
Not just the beautiful, confident, put-together version you show the world, but the messy parts too. The insecurities, the flaws, the triggers, the stubbornness, and the pieces of yourself you haven’t quite figured out how to heal.
And sometimes, that’s uncomfortable as hell.
Because when you’re alone, it’s easy to overlook your own flaws. But when you’re building a life with someone, those things have a way of coming to the surface. Suddenly, you’re being challenged to grow in ways you didn’t even realize you needed to.
And let’s be real… personal growth isn’t always pretty. Sometimes it’s frustrating, humbling, and downright exhausting.
Two incomes don’t automatically mean twice the freedom, either. Sometimes they mean twice the responsibilities, twice the challenges, and twice the things to navigate.
But here’s what I’m learning…
The beauty of a healthy relationship isn’t that life suddenly becomes easier. It’s that you have someone willing to work through the hard parts WITH you. (Some of ya’ll made this look way easier 🙃)
Someone who sees your imperfections and still chooses you. Someone who challenges you without tearing you down(but sometimes it’ll feel like you’re tearing each other apart).
Someone who holds you accountable(gross- let me be my messy self 🤣)
Someone who understands that neither of you is perfect, but you’re both willing to keep learning, growing, and showing up. 🫶
Because love isn’t just about finding someone who makes you happy. It’s about finding someone you’re willing to grow with, even when that growth is uncomfortable(did I mention uncomfortable 😳).
And being single isn’t a failure, just as being in a relationship isn’t automatically a success. Both seasons have their beauty, their lessons, their freedom, and their struggles.
So which one is harder?
I’m still not sure.
But I do know this…
Choose the hard that brings you peace. Choose the hard that helps you grow(apparently, I need a lot of growth lol) Choose the hard that’s worth the effort. 🥰
Because life will always come with challenges, no matter which path you take.
So whether you’re building a life on your own or learning how to build one with someone else…
Adjust your crown, give yourself some grace, and keep moving forward.
Because it’s all hard. But some things are absolutely worth the hard. ❤️
“Where flowers bloom, so does hope” 🌸
