Jars of Clay, A Sanctuary

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Jars of Clay, A Sanctuary

If you’ve been strong for everyone else but feel lost inside — you’re not alone. Hi there! My name is Monique Phillip, and I am the owner of Jars of Clay, LLC.

We help women heal from deep emotional wounds, reclaim their identity, and feel safe in their own skin again through compassionate & effective trauma therapy via telehealth. I’m a culturally responsive Licensed Professional Counselor in the state of Colorado, and specialize in Trauma Model Therapy and Crisis Intervention. I provide a therapeutic approach that is warm, empathic, and non-judgmental.

My style is collaborative and solution–focused. I tend to artfully weave elements of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Motivational Interviewing, as well as experiential and existential approaches into treatment. I have a Bachelor’s Degree in Psychology from the University of Houston and a Master’s Degree in Professional Counseling from Liberty University. I’ve been in the behavioral health field for over a decade, and previously worked with women of all ages in residential treatment, on probation and within the homeless community who all struggled with mental health, substance use and criminogenic issues. It has truly been the most challenging and fulfilling work I’ve ever done. Stirring up hope and helping women realize their inner power is a great passion of mine, which is what inspired me to open this practice.

08/12/2026

Yeah, I said it! LOL .

God instructs us to love our neighbor . . . AS . . . WE . . . LOVE . . . OURSELVES (Matt 22:39)

There is no way that you can love other people if you do not love yourself first.
I know it’s a shock to the system, but let it sink in.

You have been neglecting and mistreating yourself for far too long, and you know it.

All of that striving to make others happy, doing for everybody else, but yourself is NOT love, it’s fear. And if you’re honest, you would admit that it has been self-serving.

I know you’ve been doing it for so long, that even the slightest attention to yourself feels selfish.

It’s a great BIG lie! Those are your feelings talking (and you already know feelings ain’t facts). Your mind is just conditioned to ignore your needs. Retrain it by practicing something different.

I promise it will change over time. Neuroplasticity at its finest!

Start with little things like paying attention to whether or not you’ve eaten today. Disrupt unkind self-talk and start acknowledging what you are doing well. Coach yourself through things that are challenging.

Learn how to say ‘no’ when you know you don’t have the capacity. Take breaks during the day, so you can catch your breath.

It doesn’t take much. Just tiny changes. This is one way we honor God, practice self-control, and see more clearly how to safely and lovingly have relationships with others.

07/31/2026

Lesson 15484 on how to have healthy relationships.

Sometimes we’re loud and belligerent because we’re used to not being heard. Sometimes we are highly reactive because we want desperately to throw off any kind of threat.

It feels totally justified and makes perfect sense to us in the moment, but it rarely gives us the results we want.

Don’t get me wrong, getting somebody told can feel good. You feel justified . . . strong. . . dominate.

But in the end, you haven’t created any kind of permanent result. You’ll have to do again and again.

And while all that is going on, you’re totally dysregulated and out of control. Remember I told you that the best control in the whole world is having control over yourself. It strengthens your position and maintains your peace.

Moreover, it keeps your connection with God intact. That is the safest place to be.

“Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord.” [Hebrews 12:4]

I know it can be hard to believe, but you can be both assertive and respectful at the same time. You can be kind and hold boundaries. It just takes practice!

David said, “Put a guard around my mouth, keep watch at the door of my lips.” [Psalm 141:3]

He’s not saying don’t say anything. He’s demonstrating the desire to please the Lord in how He uses his words.

Remember that God is your defender and protector. You don’t always need to clap back.

05/19/2026

People ask me this ALL the time! The short answer is of course ‘no’, or I definitely wouldn’t have chosen what I do as a profession. I think there are several reasons why, though:

1.      It gives me a profound sense of purpose, because I think of it as a service the Lord has equipped me for. It makes me really happy to be aligned with my spiritual values.

2.      I tend to be a very interest driven person with strong intuition and pattern recognition abilities (thanks ADHD!). I never get bored, because I basically get to be a detective and strategize all the time. My brain is ALL lit up!

3.      I loathe superficial conversation and feel very privileged that my clients trust me enough to share the most vulnerable parts of themselves. Those connections are so deeply moving and meaningful to me.

4.      I tend to work with clients that I significantly relate to, and helping each of them heal is like a repetitive “undoing” of my own past similar painful experiences. It’s weirdly satisfying.

5.      I’m intentional about compartmentalizing what is work and what is personal. While the bond between me and my clients is special, I have the perspective that those relationships are not personal and could end at any time.

6.      I am constantly praying over my clients, my work, and my functioning as a therapist. Because I believe that God works in me and through me, and also arranges my circumstances, I get to let go of the outcomes and feel grounded in the work I’m doing (so freeing!).

7.      Watching the light come on in people’s eyes as they are healing is like opening presents on Christmas morning! How could I ever get tired of that?! It’s literally a favorite thing.

05/12/2026

You want things in your life to improve? Prioritize your stability!

05/10/2026

Happy Mother's Day, y'all! I hope you feel loved all day long. ❤️

04/28/2026

You ever have a moment of realization that you keep walking into the same situations over and over again?

You ask yourself, “Why does this keep happening to me?”

It doesn’t make sense. You think for a minute that you might be cursed.

No matter what you do or how much time has passed, there it is again.

Same kind of relationships. Same conflicts. A sneaking suspicion that you are inadvertently turning into your mother.

Groundhog’s day.

Here’s a bit of a revelation. Sometimes repetition is training. Another opportunity to pursue and utilize wisdom. (You gotta admit that sometimes we can be hard headed.)

It could be that . . . the reason you keep circling the same lesson is because God is actually trying to strengthen something in you?

Wrote about it in my new Substack blog. If it resonates, check me out.

03/31/2026

You wanna know what one of the hardest parts about healing is?

Realizing that the parts of you that kept you safe…

are also the ones keeping you stuck.

Read that again.

Somewhere along the way…
survival started to feel like your personality.

Honestly, the core of you is still buried underneath hurt and fear.

Truth is, there is a way to come back to your real self—
without pretending, performing, or proving anything to anyone else.

And it starts with a mirror. If you're tired of calling survival "strength", check the new blog in the bio.

03/17/2026

NEW BLOG POST OUT! Not every season calls for hustle. Sometimes the purpose is in the pause. 🌿

Read my latest thoughts on Substack — link in bio.

03/10/2026

I understand the feeling of being trapped by a web of the fear of being rejected, having anxiety over somebody's unrealistic expectations, or codependency that causes you to abandon yourself.

You're thinking, “I don’t know how much longer I can do this” or “How did I get here?”

Maybe you’re just a shell of yourself inside what used to be a great relationship.

Let me say this with my full chest - You DO NOT have to keep doing the same thing over and over again!

Trauma from your past does not have to define your future. You are not STUCK with it!

It can be hard to turn your attention to yourself, but self-awareness is so powerful.

Control over yourself will always trump the manipulation of others.

You can learn how to tolerate what you are feeling, rather than giving that power to someone else.

Challenge yourself to heal and grow, so you can truly give someone real love, instead of desperation.

Psalm 147:3 says, “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” God’s restoration is available for every emotional wound, and you can learn to carry it into your relationships.

If you wanna learn more, paste this link into your browser for information on my Ultimate Relationship Reconnection Bundle.

https://gems-from-clay-jars.mn.co/landing/plans/1954520

Let me walk you out of this trap!

03/03/2026

To the woman who is always the strong one…

The one who figures it out.
Holds it together.
Carries it courageously.

You can stop living braced for impact all the time.

There is a softening that has been happening in me for some time now — not weakness or quitting — but a holy unraveling of the pressure to have the answers, the backup plan, the steady face for everyone else.

And it feels like exhale.

My newest blog post is live on Substack. It’s tender. It’s honest. It’s for the woman who is tired of being the pillar and is ready to be held by God instead.

Gems from a Clay Jar is reader-supported. You can subscribe for free, or become a paid subscriber to support this work and walk deeper with me.

Come read.
Link in bio. 🤍

Address

7222 Commerce Center Drive #220
Colorado Springs, CO
80919

Website

http://www.jocsanctuary.com/

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