Because of medical conditions, my 13-year career in the Army ended, with no plan for the future. It suddenly faced me with finding a new direction that I wanted to take myself. Faced with finding a new purpose and a new career, I basically had to redefine myself. I was scared; not only was I dealing with PTSD and other issues from serving in combat. I faced many challenges that I never encountered before. I planned on an Army career, serving 20 or more years and retiring, but life had a different direction for me. The scary part is, I didn’t have any clue what that direction was. I now realize that I made several mistakes I could have avoided and wished I had, but such is life. We all make mistakes, but what if I didn’t have to? Would I be in a better position today if I hadn’t? Would I be more successful? Would I feel more fulfilled? We know these would haves could go on and on and possibly fill several pages. So, you probably are wondering what did I do wrong? Here are a few that I feel were the major issues that affected my progress along the way.
1. The end of my military career and challenge of finding comparable employment left me feeling broken.
2. The fear of failing left me scared of trying new things.
3. I believed in the limitations others set for me.
4. I let other’s opinions of me control myself-worth
5. I failed to set proper goals before and even after exiting the Army
6. Overall, I struggled to find the right path. But the other question is, what did I learn from my experience and wished I knew beforehand? In hindsight, I feel the most significant thing one can ever do for themselves is merely listening to what you want from life. Drown out the guidelines, the advice, the should haves. Forget the opinions and all how others tell you to live and live in this world as you want to. All this wasn’t easy and took time to realize, but change isn’t easy. I didn’t understand that finding my true direction and version of myself and even happiness would not be comfortable. It is tough to find a new way of doing things differently, to walk away from life, love, or the hope that I once wanted. It’s never easy to change. But another great gift you can allow yourself is to push towards finding out what your version of happiness looks like, growing on your own terms, determining what matters most to you, what sparks the fire in your own heart, what drives you to love yourself even more and finally find your true direction to live life on your own terms. To me, finding my true direction means becoming the person I want to be, rather than the person others tell you to be. In the end, life is all about finding the joy in life that works for one person alone, you! But this doesn’t mean you need to do it alone. If I could do it again, I wish there was someone to assist me in developing a blueprint along my journey and coach me through some, if not most, of that time. Looking back, I feel that with the right “Blueprint”, I could have been more successful in finding my true direction. I wish to be that person. Someone to help guide others in developing reasonable goals, to value themselves, and understand that it’s not your fault just because something in life doesn’t work out. On December 13, 2021, I accepted a position with Goodwill Manasota’s Veteran Service team. Where now, I have the privilege of assisting veterans who are facing similar barriers, find meaningful employment and regain a sense of purpose, pride, dignity; thus, believing in themselves, reaching their goals and achieving their true direction. Letting them know things I wished I would have had as my road map setting off in my true direction.
1. You’re Not Broken
2. It’s Alright to Fail
3. You Can Bust the Myths
4. The Power of Self Worth
5. The Power of Goal Setting
6. Live Your Life with Intention
I wish to empower others to set goals and establish accountability for their personal success. I will guide them in their aspirations, clarifying the choices in front of them and creating that action plan to achieve their goals and true direction. Keeping in mind; this is their direction; I serve as an objective sounding board, allowing them to stay focused and on track. Working together, we will break through old barriers and develop new practices to reach set goals. I once saw a meme and to this day it resonates with me. It states, “I want to inspire people. I want someone to look at me and say because of you, I didn’t give up.”
I want to make sure that others are not part of the 22. The bottom line is to never stop fighting!
