Love and Other Indoor Sports

04/17/2025

It’s natural to want your partner to act a certain way—listen more, be more affectionate, help out more often. But here’s the truth: you can’t control your partner’s behavior.



What you can control is how you express your needs, how you manage your emotions, and how you choose to show up in your relationship.



Instead of demanding change, focus on sharing your positive needs. Express what you would like to happen (positive) instead of what you want to stop (negative).



“I’d love it if we spent more one-on-one time together this week,” is more effective than “You never make time for me.”



You can also choose to turn toward bids for connection—those small moments when your partner reaches out, even subtly. And when conflict arises, try to respond with curiosity instead of criticism.



You have power—not over them, but over how you communicate, connect, and care.



Today, identify one positive need and share it gently. Let your actions lead with love and see how your partner responds.

11/11/2022

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07/07/2022

02/08/2022

Dr. John Gottman says, “Successful long-term relationships are created through small words, small gestures, and small acts.”

You don’t need grand gestures to show your partner love. Instead, frequent small gestures, such as hugging, holding hands, and regular acts of kindness will help to make your partner feel adored and appreciated.

01/20/2022

6. Reminisce together

Reminisce about your favorite date nights, wedding day, honeymoon, and travels together. Pull out old photos and discuss your shared memories that are attached to strong feelings. This is an important part of building your love maps and will bring you closer.

Be sure to revisit this list when you both feel like you need to bring more opportunities to connect into your relationship!

01/20/2022

5. Dream together

Take some time to discuss your individual and shared goals and dreams. Discuss your relationship bucket list and what you want your future to look like. Dreaming together helps build security and strengthens your bond.

01/20/2022

4. Start a relationship journal

Your love journal can be anything you want it to be. Write down what you love about each other, what you’re grateful for, or things you want to improve. Share your entries with each other and see how it opens communication in your relationship.

01/20/2022

3. Show up for each other

In hard times and good times, make sure you are supporting each other. Trusting that you and your partner will turn towards one another in emotional moments, as well as in everyday conversation, is truly what good relationships are all about.

01/20/2022

2. Schedule a weekly date

Yes, we sound like a broken record, but date night is so important. It gives you and your partner time to focus on each other. Want to mix it up? Schedule a date and keep the plans a surprise. The anticipation will spark a renewed sense of fun.

01/20/2022

Here are 6 ways to turn towards each other and reignite the spark:

1. Stay screen-free during meals

This one is seriously underrated. Keep your phones away from meal time and see what conversations blossom just by being present in the moment. Want to go above and beyond? Make a goal to spend an hour together screen-free every day.

01/07/2022