Positive Regard for You

Positive Regard for You Therapist

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06/12/2026

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If you’re from the tri-state area, you might be feeling it too.The buzz around the Knicks. The excitement around the Wor...
06/09/2026

If you’re from the tri-state area, you might be feeling it too.

The buzz around the Knicks. The excitement around the World Cup coming to our area. People talking to strangers. People gathering. People celebrating. Woop! I love it.

It’s awakened something in me that I haven’t connected with in a while.

I spend a lot of time thinking, analyzing, helping, and trying to make things better. But lately I’ve been reminded of something equally important: collective joy.

While reading recently, I came across the term collective effervescence, coined by sociologist Émile Durkheim. It’s the feeling of energy and connection that emerges when people come together around a shared experience.

I love that he used the word effervescence. It feels very bubbly and alive. Like the feeling of being part of something bigger than yourself for a little while.

We (or I) spend so much time talking about loneliness and division. Maybe I also need to talk more about the power of gathering, celebrating, and experiencing joy together.

Maybe that’s part of what we’ve been missing. I know I have.

Happy Pride Month!!!
06/01/2026

Happy Pride Month!!!

For me, the act of non-doing has been transformational.For a long time, I was the type of person who felt the need to sw...
05/20/2026

For me, the act of non-doing has been transformational.

For a long time, I was the type of person who felt the need to swoop in and save people before they even asked. I’d make things about myself. I’d put myself down or make sarcastic, self-deprecating jokes to clear the air whenever I sensed tension between friends or family. I’d throw myself under the bus to avoid conflict. I needed to control everything because somewhere deep down, I thought it was my job to manage the emotional temperature of every room I walked into.

I’ve learned to stop interjecting so much. To allow things to unfold naturally. To let people learn the lessons they need to learn without immediately rescuing, fixing, softening, buffering, or managing it for them.

Non-doing isn’t laziness. It isn’t indifference. It’s trusting that not every moment requires your intervention.

Non-doing might look like:
• sitting outside without needing to document it
• letting yourself rest without earning it first
• noticing a feeling without immediately analyzing it
• allowing a conversation to have pauses
• drinking coffee without multitasking
• taking a walk without turning it into productivity
• existing in a moment without trying to improve it

Ironically, many people find that when they stop forcing every moment, they feel more alive inside of it.

There’s a line in mindfulness practices about “the bloom of the present moment,” and I love that image because presence is less something we manufacture and more something we notice unfolding when we stop gripping so tightly.

Maybe not every moment needs to become something.
Maybe some moments are allowed to simply be experienced.

Last week, I read a post in a therapist group saying the number one thing people use ChatGPT for is therapy.Now don’t ge...
05/18/2026

Last week, I read a post in a therapist group saying the number one thing people use ChatGPT for is therapy.

Now don’t get me wrong, I love ChatGPT and AI. It helps me often: creating exercises, writing these captions, even offering me advice on my own emotional needs sometimes. But there’s truly nothing like a human body being in tune with yours giving you unconditional positive regard, wanting the very very best for you, and helping you heal not just through words, but through presence.

If anything, I kind of like when people walk into therapy well-informed. It means we don’t have to spend as much time on psychoeducation. We get to go deeper by feeling, breathing, being.

We get to explore strength inside our fear.

We move things physically, emotionally, and yes, even spiritually through the body and the mind. That’s what helps us become more resilient. That’s what human healing looks like.

Self-criticism refers to the habit of being excessively hard on oneself, often focusing on perceived flaws, mistakes, or...
05/16/2026

Self-criticism refers to the habit of being excessively hard on oneself, often focusing on perceived flaws, mistakes, or shortcomings. This inner critic can be relentless and demanding, leading to feelings of inadequacy, low self-esteem, and even depression or anxiety.

Self-criticism can manifest in various ways. Some individuals constantly compare themselves to others, feeling they fall short in every aspect of life. Others may set impossibly high standards for themselves and berate themselves when they inevitably fail to meet them. Regardless of the specific form it takes, self-criticism can have a profound impact on an individual’s mental and emotional well-being.

Cultivating a kind and understanding attitude toward oneself and treating oneself with the same kindness and support that one would offer to a close friend helps counteract the harsh self-judgment and promotes a more balanced and accepting perspective.

It’s such a weird time to be a content creator right now, especially in the mental health space. The landscape feels com...
05/06/2026

It’s such a weird time to be a content creator right now, especially in the mental health space. The landscape feels completely different than it did a year ago, and honestly worlds away from when I started posting eight years ago.

With AI becoming so integrated into content creation, it’s getting harder to tell what’s genuinely human versus what was manufactured in 15 seconds from a prompt. While some of it is legitimately impressive and informative, I can’t lie… a lot of it feels strangely empty to me. It’s hard to explain, but it appears surface-level, like something is missing from it.

And yes, I’ve used AI too. Mostly for grammar, sentence structure, organizing thoughts, etc. I’m torn in this way. But the actual ideas, reflections, opinions, and voice are still mine. I think there’s a difference between using a tool versus outsourcing the ENTIRE act of meaning-making. 

I’ve noticed it’s made me want to spend less time on Instagram, and it’s definitely impacted my motivation and excitement around posting. Which is sad, because this account has genuinely meant a lot to me emotionally over the years. I don’t make money from it and it’s never really been about that anyway. It’s just been a place where I’ve been able to think out loud, connect with people, share ideas, and hopefully make others feel a little less alone.

I’m still figuring out what posting looks like for me moving forward. I think it may mean more blog-style writing, more research and evidence-based reflections, and continuing to make my own graphics because, that part still brings me joy. I love choosing colors, finding images, and trying to visually capture a feeling or idea.

So if I’ve been a little MIA lately, that’s why. I’m trying to reconnect with what feels authentic, human, meaningful, and creatively alive again.

If you’ve been feeling this too, I’d genuinely love to hear about it.

🕶 When I notice that I’m starting to ruminate with negative thoughts about myself, I sometimes imagine putting on a pair...
05/05/2026

🕶 When I notice that I’m starting to ruminate with negative thoughts about myself, I sometimes imagine putting on a pair of “kindness sunglasses”. Looking at yourself through a lens of self compassion can help us to more quickly rebound from hard times and move us in the direction of loving ourselves fully. 🕶

Optimization anxiety is sneaky.It sounds like:“I just want to do this the right way.”“I need a little more clarity first...
04/28/2026

Optimization anxiety is sneaky.

It sounds like:
“I just want to do this the right way.”
“I need a little more clarity first.”

But a lot of the time, it’s avoidance in a really convincing outfit.

We research instead of decide.
We plan instead of start.
We even turn hobbies into full side quests… trying to name, brand, or monetize them before we’ve even let ourselves enjoy them.

And slowly, the experience gets replaced with management.

Optimization gives a false sense of control.
Like if we plan well enough, we can avoid discomfort. But the discomfort isn’t the problem. It’s the doorway towards our values. And the trust is the next step. You already know how to pivot and you already know how to adjust.

Maybe not everything needs to be maximized and some things just need to be started.

Re-parenting yourself is a form of self-care. This is especially important if you grew up in a household with neglect, m...
04/21/2026

Re-parenting yourself is a form of self-care. This is especially important if you grew up in a household with neglect, manipulation or abuse. Parenting yourself reinforces the idea that you are important enough to care for. The items on this list might seem trivial, but they are things that parents should do for their children and they come from a place of unconditional positive regard. When you think about it, we are parenting ourselves each day. So, what kind of parent do you wanna be?

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