Young Adult Therapy

11/19/2025

I rarely share these type of posts that I see on friends’ pages, but this one is one i can attest to as a therapist. Most of these come under the category of “appealing to your senses”. When your cerebral cortex has you looping through depressing or anxious thougjts, a proven technique to break the loop is to shift the part of your brain that is dominating by appealing to your senses. Listen, watch, touch, smell, and taste things that make you calmer. It works!

💜DEPRESSION TIPS:
Shower. Not a bath, a shower.
Use water as hot or cold as you like. You don’t even need to wash. Just get in under the water and let it run over you for a while. Sit on the floor if you gotta.

Moisturize everything.
Use whatever lotion you like.
Unscented? Dollar store lotion? Fancy 48 hour lotion that makes you smell like a field of wildflowers? Use whatever you want, and use it all over your entire dermis.

Put on clean, comfortable clothes.
Put on your favorite underwear.
Those ridiculous boxers you bought last year with jalapeños on the butt? Put them on.

Drink cold water.
Use ice. If you want, add some mint or lemon for an extra boost.

Clean something.
Doesn’t have to be anything big. Organize one drawer of a desk. Wash five dirty dishes. Do a load of laundry. Scrub the bathroom sink.

BLAST MUSIC.
Listen to something upbeat and dancey and loud, something that’s got lots of energy. Sing to it, DANCE 💃 to it, even if you suck at both.

Make food.
Don’t just grab a granola bar to munch. Take the time and make food. Even if it’s ramen. Add something special to it, like a soft boiled egg or some veggies. Prepare food, it tastes way better, and you’ll feel like you accomplished something.

Make something.
Write a short story or a poem, draw a picture, color a picture, fold origami, crochet or knit, sculpt something out of clay, anything artistic. Even if you don’t think you’re good at it. Create.

Go outside.
Take a walk. Sit in the grass. Look at the clouds. Smell flowers. Put your hands in the dirt and feel the soil against your skin.

Call someone. Call a loved one, a friend, a family member, call a chat service if you have no one else to call. Talk to a stranger on the street. Have a conversation and listen to someone’s voice. If you can’t bring yourself to call, text or email or whatever, just have some social interaction with another person. Even if you don’t say much, listen to them. It helps.

Cuddle your pets if you have them/can cuddle them.
Take pictures of them. Talk to them. Tell them how you feel, about your favorite movie, a new game coming out, anything.

May seem small or silly to some, but this list keeps people alive.

*** At your absolute best you won’t be good enough for the wrong people. But at your worst, you’ll still be worth it to the right ones. Remember that. Keep holding on.

03/25/2025

I think this is a really interesting interview with Sanjay Gupta and Cara Natterson (the author of "The Care and Keeping of You) about what's happening regarding trends in onset of puberty. There's some interesting discussion about why puberty is happening earlier than it did a generation ago, focusing on the increase in cortisol production that results from daily stressors. This could include stressors like food insecurity or violence but also might include exposure to constant stimulation from digital media. The interview includes some advice to parents on just how early they should talk to their kids about what's happening in their bodies.

Research shows that kids are starting puberty earlier than ever, with the average age now beginning at 8 for girls and 9 for boys. But what does this mean for their long-term health? Sanjay sits down with Dr. Cara Natterson, a pediatrician and expert on adolescent health, to discuss the implications...

06/30/2024

Today is the end of my 10th year of private practice and this is a reflection on those ten years. I describe what my practice is about and how it's changed since 2014.

04/16/2024

I have not read this book yet, but it has been recommended by several of my friends and colleagues. I agree with most of the points made in this interview with the author. My observation, based on my private practice, is that rates of anxiety and mal-adaptive behaviors are increasing across all age groups (13-30) and the most concerning behaviors (e.g. self-harm) are moving to younger and younger children. In addition to the points made in this summary, I would add that the constant connection to social media means that conflict resolution doesn't include periods of time to pause and reflect without the input of peers. It is important for the development of emotional control to have time to think independently about the content of one's interactions. I highly encourage parents to limit the amount of time their middle-school and high-school aged children spend on their phones.

With his book “The Anxious Generation,” social psychologist Jonathan Haidt calls for a revolution in how parents administer smartphones and social media to children.

01/25/2024

This is interesting commentary regarding the health effects of any amount of alcohol. There is a common belief that one drink a day is somehow good for heart health, but this was based on one study published in 1991of the Mediterranean lifestyle. Since then, other studies have shown correlations between alcohol consumption and certain cancers and that even one drink per day increases systolic blood pressure and has negative health effects on the liver.

Dr. Sanjay Gupta looks at how the medical consensus on alcohol has changed over the years and what medical experts are saying about the effects of alcohol today.

08/03/2023

In my practice, I teach that employing rhythmic activities will help calm the brain and bring the nervous system out of fight-or-flight mode. Patterned breathing, as described well in this article, is one example of rhythmic activity that can be used to reduce anxiety and aid sleep. Those who know me well know that I prefer creating haikus (5-7-5) over patterned breathing, but the principal is the same. Next time you are having trouble falling asleep try one of these techniques and see how it works for you!

The 4-7-8 breathing method can calm your mind and body by relaxing your nervous system and decreasing heart rate and blood pressure, which gets your body in the optimal state for sleep.

05/11/2023

As I launch my tenth year in private practice, I revisit the four-pillar framework that informs my approach to therapy and I introduce a new, fifth pillar. The fifth pillar is routine, positive social interaction, which can be a critical buoy to mental health.

As I launch my tenth year in private practice, I revisit the four-pillar framework that informs my approach to therapy and I introduce a new, fifth pillar. The…

02/04/2023

One of the central ideas that I convey to my clients is that focusing on patterns is the tried-and-true method of getting out of looped, anxious thinking. The patterned breathing method described below works because it shifts the nervous system out of fight or flight mode. This method also works to calm down when things are stressful during the day. I've found that any type of patterned thinking induces relaxation so if patterned breathing seems boring, one can try tapping, counting steps, creating poetry, playing or listening to music, painting, coloring, doing puzzles, or any other activity that is patterned-based. The key is to find what works for the individual who is experiencing the anxiety.

The 4-7-8 breathing method can calm your mind and body by relaxing your nervous system and decreasing heart rate and blood pressure, which gets your body in the optimal state for sleep.

11/28/2022

We talk about boundaries a lot because they help create healthy relationships. I think these examples are really well articulated.

11/19/2022

Mental health and physical health go hand-in-hand. I often talk to young adults who regret that they don't have time to exercise because of their busy work and school lives. But there's a lot one can do to maintain long-term physical health that doesn't require a gym membership, a daily run, or a significant amount of time. I'm not sure I'd go as far as saying good balance makes life worth living, but balance is an overlooked aspect of physical health that is important to overall wellness. Practicing balance can incorporated easily into daily activities. Examples would be standing on one foot while waiting for the microwave to heat up dinner or practicing balance while standing in front of the computer or TV.

When people think about improving their physical fitness, they often overlook the issue of balance. That's a critical oversight. Good balance is an integral part of being physically fit and key to living a long life. It's an important issue for everyone, no matter your age.